Do Dismissive Avoidants Really Care If You Apply The NO CONTACT RULE?

In this video, Coach Courtney Gatlin talks about if avoidants really care if you apply the no contact rule.

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[batmikipig]

I'd say they care if they are lonely. If they have someone to keep them busy you're just dust.

[TripleJJJJJJ]

It doesn’t matter if they care or not. No contact is for you to get yourself back. What the toxic person thinks about it is immaterial. You only care about this if you are trying to get their attention.

[cherylthompson]

It doesn't matter what's wrong with him. Ghosting, ignoring, only communicating when THEY want to is inhuman. I barely survived 9 months of him acting like I never existed and now that his mother passes away, he contacted me out of the blue. But, still I can't contact him.

[ryandavis]

This is where I'm at. Idk if my DA cares at all. I feel like 3 years ment nothing to her. I miss her and what we had. I had alot of great thoughts of the future. Ill continue to heal, and work on my own attachment style. But I won't stop moving forward.

[adoptioncorner]

They don't unfortunately and it's heartbreaking

[nikkipvt]

Mine comes back every time? I wish I understood him better! He’s truly an amazing man❣️

[angrychickadee]

he broke up with me very suddenly after I brought up commitment. we had an amazing connection and I know he cares. he never gave me indication something was wrong between us, but he did tell me he felt guilt when I complimented him. I worry about him, I believe he is setting himself up for a life of loneliness

[Amethysts_moon]

They are so afraid and yes they are lonely and sad because they can't never be real to themselves or anyone else. I'm not trying to put anyone down, but that's how I see it. So paranoid, so insecure, so fearful that, needs to grow a pants like real man, not like a 3-year-old who throws a thunderstorm when the situation doesn't fit him.

[Dreamsareareality]

Thank you it was explained so well!!! 💜 Look at your channel and how much it grew!! This is amazing!!

[foreveryoungpisces]

Yes, he cares. We're an LDR, unable to visit each other for the last 2 yrs due to pandemic. He's shut down on me for a few days to a week (mostly due to loadshedding in S. Africa) off and on, and I'd be grief stricken, but would be okay with it after I understood. Sometimes I'd go quiet too, to ground myself, and he'd be callling and calling. These past two years have been hard on relationships of every type, but now easing up and he's flying to me next month. (After 4 cancellations -- travel bans, lockdowns -- our enthusiasm a bit dampened). We'll see how it goes! Thank you. 🙏

[nicholusmthokozisi]

If they really care, how is it that they just find it easy to switch up on u and never give u answers for it😔

[JaeSwiftJamellaSwift]

I dated an avoidant a few years ago. He broke up with me because I told him that I would like to get married one day, not to him specifically, just in general. Two weeks later, the tables turned. He started to pursue me, badly. That lasted for 2-3 years. I was done with him and the more he called the more I was done.

I recently broke up with another avoidant that I really like. I am hoping that he will rise to the occasion because I know for sure that he cares and he was hurt when I ended it.

[AggroGaming]

We care, but we won't cross the line, if you dumped us, if we dumped you, it will take awhile to open up and try again, but it will be a slow process

[dorklingduck]

Im testing out preventively facilitating friendly short term no contact in situations when they’d normally feel the impulse to retreat- “hey I know you’re gonna be really busy and stressed this week, so I’m gonna leave you alone.” So far it seems to kind of put us on the same team-hoping this might help heal the whole “it’s me against the world” mindset. I’m a pretty secure attachment style but DA seems to throw me out of whack. I think this process helps me learn to feel more unconditionally secure as well as time goes on. I like them to be around, I want them to be around, I’m not stressed if they’re not around.

[Theysopretty]

I'm a dismissive avoidant but with a certain few I turn anxious preoccupied for little spells. Thanks for been nice to us. My childhood was shitty and weird 😅

[antranettejohnson]

Hmmm... I think I'm in this position right now and I was wondering if he even cared.

[EnglishWinterRunne]

DA here - I would LOVE it if my AP ex would go into no contact 🤣

[fuliviacannady]

Thanks, Jeff! Valuable information here 💯

[heartbreakercedes]

I act like I didn’t care but really did now I’m regretting pushing him away

[jenorozco]

I was with my ex for 3.5 years and share a child together, an intense and passionate relationship with many ups and downs.... Things got hard so he checked out fearing opening up. I dont even know if i want him back due to his emotional unavailability & invalidating my feelings time and time again but i do miss the idea of having a family as he does have some great qualities, potential and hes a good Dad hes just shut down completely atm . He acts as if the breakup doesnt bother him and rather relieved which stings like crazy. As the anxious counterpart i was an emotional wreck before leaving with our boy. but been keeping strict no contact unless its about our son. Hes very prone to seek other women right away through dating apps when single so thats even shittier to imagine what hes upto while im grieving the relationship and loss of our family 😓 but thats completely out of my control just gotta let him go and do my thing to get well myself. Any advice please coach? I love your videos btw is helping me getting closure xx