PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE People Do This… ⚠️

This is why you're passive aggressive!

Julien Blanc (AKA JulienHimself) is a Swiss-born, U.S.-based self-help speaker, entrepreneur and transformational coach.

Since 2010, he has been traveling around the world and has personally coached tens of thousands of clients face to face... Empowering them to create massive success in their lives!

His record-breaking programs Transformation Mastery, Transformation Mastery Live, Transformation Mastery Live Advanced, Transformation Mastery Academy & Transformation Mastery Mentoring help people around the world achieve the HEALTH, WEALTH, RELATIONSHIPS & HAPPINESS they deserve!

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PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE People Do This… ⚠️

How to stop being passive aggressive in relationships! In this short, Julien Blanc (AKA Julien Himself) reveals the truth about passive aggressive behavior.

#julienblanc #julienhimself #boundaries

[JulienHimself]

This is why you're passive aggressive... ⚠️

[DLuzElAngelMusikal]

That’s good advice. I used to be passive aggressive and learned to communicate better but now I’m at the point where I will tell people how I feel but then perhaps decide to not expect any type of friendship from them anymore because I have gotten hurt by so many friends. I’m not sure if that’s bad but I don’t know how to get out of that mindset right now.

[dannierae]

I do resonate worth this as something I do: I shall explain. U have come to the realization that in many instances, if you are dealing with someone who has challenges with action feedback it is best to know when is appropriate to bring up so your message can be heard. If you bring it up when they are in defense mode, it WILL be an arhuement from their side. ( you can also not give a shut and also not have someone in your life who behaves this way as well. )

There is also trauma response shut down: I experience this as well. It is when someone says something obviously hurtful, they act like it's okay/oblivious. You think to yourself "wow, That was obviously rude. Well I don't even want to talk now..." and shut down happens automatically.

Are both situations unhealthy, yes. Both are also reserving energy, self protection and time sorring( figuring out when is best to bring up.)

In an ideal world, we would be able to express our pain response, how that triggered us, what we will do to heal that trigger and what the other person can do/actions to not repeat while both parties respectfully step out of defensive ego to communicate.

[missdirectedawakening]

I grew up like that. My mom was constantly upset, and as a child, I can say I was terrifying to exist.

[kaylatakara]

Sometimes it seems more beneficial to just be quiet and hope the situation disperses rather than confrontation. Especially when it's an illogical battle you'll never get a resolution from.
Well, hopefully through confrontation they can think about the words said after the storm has passed.
It's the being strong part that's hard. Standing in your truth even with tears in your eyes.

[smarre]

That's some of the best advice; argue/discuss difficult things when you're on good terms. That way you can actually have a productive conversation/discussion without it ending up in even more of a conflict

[swedishgirl]

It doesnt matter whether you bring it up then or later, people will get really defensive. Whats worse is you bring it up later, they accuse you of being petty for still thinking about it.

[SmilyJokr]

I love the advice, but this won't work if a close family member is a narcissist. 😶

[ValenSerethi]

That's true sometimes. But, there are times when the person (that person could be you or me) did something they themselves know was wrong, and played dumb as if they didn't understand, when in fact they did, because it was obvious. In Those situations, it might be perfectly healthy to let the other person admit where they were wrong. This is also effective against partners who have a habit of gaslighting. I think passive aggression may have actually been learned as a coping mechanism from dealing with gaslighting. I love Julien Blanc, i learned a lot from him as a pick-up coach, but he's actually a master gaslighter.

[longlinez]

That is a good advice friend but the patience it requires is hard to keep😅😅 but I try my best😅😅

[bricktop]

I can be that way still at times with my wife with serious issues.. thanks for this I needed to see it!

[anniegarnett]

How do you work on not being like this? I grew up not feeling comfortable to communicate my feelings, and now I’m in a steady, loving marriage and he truly wants to have that communication with me but I’m still stuck in the “keep quiet, don’t be too loud or you’ll upset someone” mindset.

[martaaktorkiewicz]

I am always feel like it, how can I talk about something killing me inside....HOW

[HuwPewPew]

I'm somewhat guilty of this. I'm usually very direct, however because I'm an irritable sort I tend to pick my battles otherwise id just be constantly nagging people about things I don't like. So I try to decide what is worth addressing and what is just me being a dick.

[zaidaliahmed]

I'm surprised by how good his advice is, some of this is therapy-level advice. I'm not sure if he's done it himself or educated himself on it or smth.

[MetalDeathMusic]

I'm always working on improving this, but I just did this the other day. Somebody straight up told somebody else something they should have told me, when they were standing right beside me. I got very hurt because I really like that person, we always got along well. I shut down and reacted instead of trying to calm down, breathe and then say "hey, I didn't like that and it hurt". It made things a lot worse and we ended up not talking for a couple days.

[onyx]

Thank you 8 year old boy who wished he could be an adult for one day so he could dress himself.

[felixtrinidad]

You can’t do that with your parents . I have a dad who will just roll my eyes smirk and treat me like I’m a piece of trash if I ask to talk😂😂😂