DYSREGULATION & CPTSD: Triggered by Hurrying and Overwhelm?

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THIS VIDEO is one of 20 lessons from my online Dysregulation Bootcamp. Learn to notice brain and emotional dysregulation from Childhood PTSD/CPTSD and practice quickly re-regulating to powerfully improve your emotional balance, mental clarity and connections with others.

10 Emergency Measures to Re-Regulate:
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[danielmarrero]

I have no idea who you are. Where you came from. But, thank you. I am so thankful this page came up. I can’t stop watching them, never felt so seen before.

[theresarezac]

Now I know why I loved Mr Rogers so much. He always came through the door happy and predictable, singing about what a beautiful day it was...not yelling or rushing or drunk or angry.

[bibofmahatti]

Oops, that‘s me. Not getting out of bed, then feeling overwhelmed by stuff that is wating to be done which makes me pull the duvet higher up the chin and wait for some miracle while slowly start worrying cause know I am procrastinating which brings me back to overwhelm. I try to hurry up then but feel stressed. Thanks for this insight.

[pavla]

I've never heard anyone address this topic before, I was almost never allowed to finish or accomplish anything as a child before being forced to start something else - whatever my parents deemed needing doing 'right now' . And then I married someone who was always pushing, herding me into doing what he wanted all the time to the point that I felt I was the least important person in my own life . When I finally blew one day and told him that I was SO sick of being pushed and pushed all the time he acted like he didn't even know what I was talking about - he OWNED my time as far as he was concerned . And now I mostly do this to myself and barely survive getting ready to leave the house to travel . It's amazing the stress of getting a thousand things done before getting out the door hasn't killed me before now .

[emmamacgregor]

Anna, I am always utterly astounded by how incredibly precise your descriptions are of things I experience, that I chastised myself for...without standing back, but just thinking that something was very wrong and defective about me. Thank you, thank you, thank you for explaining these emotions, and especially for making me feel that I am not "wrong" or "defective" or even better...providing tools to get through this stuff, put is aside....and ultimately THRIVE! My Nana also lived with us. :) She was my rock and both a source of fun and stability and reason. As I watched Billy Connolly's interview with his wife, a psychologist, he said inside he was 4. I have recently heard that we stay at the age were were when a trauma occurred. He was 4 when his mother abandoned the family. I asked myself 'how old am I inside'? I have often thought 12. I didn't think anything big happened that year...so why? A few hours later it hit me...Nana left when I was 12 and the world was never, ever the safe sanctuary again and I rarely got to see her afterward.


YT has provided me with endless resources on organizing and cleaning ( I grew up in a severely hoarded house), and now healing.


Thank you, truly, for sharing your sorrows and for providing light!!!


Blessings, M.

[kelseycoca]

Aww, that part about Mr. Rogers made me tear up. That's so sweet. I haven't seen the movie about his life but I've heard a lot about him as a person, and he always felt like he wasn't good enough for his audience. That's just the sweetest thing I've ever heard that he did things in such a meticulous manner to help kids heal. I'm sure he understood what it was like and wished he had a calming place to heal, too, so he provided that to his audience💕

[ItCantRainForever]

Hurry is not of the devil, hurry is the devil. ~Carl Jung~
When I seen that quote it had a whole new meaning to me. Lol

[baxterandcotton]

Your insight about Mr Rodger's intentionality makes me think about the ASMR YouTube phenomenon. I discovered it while dealing with grief from a coerced abortion and isolated unhealthy relationship, and always thought the sense of caretaking and companionship was what attracted so many. And now I think you're right that we crave purposefulness and intentionality, especially during disregulation and chaos. Says something about parenthood as well- what a gift healthy boundaries, systems and rules are for our young developing minds that can easily imagine any hill as a cliff. Thanks for all you do and share with us here!

[beccabean]

Oh wow, this explains a lot. Now I know why I don't like to be rushed. I thought it was because I was always being yelled at to hurry up as a kid and it was me rebelling.

[bealivebefree]

I remember also being really mesmerized by Mr. Rodgers and his routine at the beginning of each episode and not really knowing why that was. Now you bring up an excellent point. Perhaps his show was a source of stability for little kids who were growing up in chaotic situations.
I think the gas pump thing happens somewhat frequently. I almost did it once too.

[clairelariviere]

I break things, hurt myself and get easily frustrated with others when I'm disregulated.

[LivingMyBestLifeIAm]

OMG I couldn’t figure it out until you said Mr. Rogers. You operarte on the same calm as he did. YOU are this eras Mr. R. I love you from the very bottom of my little broken heart. I DID watch the movie a few months ago and it was amazing to watch his story as an adult. Have you ever thought of doing a child’s show for this generation’s little ones who are trying to navigate their crappy childhood that will inevitably bring them to THIS channel in the future? ❤️❤️❤️🇨🇦

[aussie_has_fomo]

Learning about C-PTSD & emotional dysregulation is life changing for me! I now understand why I get so stressful out (now I know it’s called dysregulation) when I have to rush or hurry. I’m so grateful for the information you’re sharing here. I have never felt so seen! 🙏❤️

[jaynej]

You are an amazing hero. Thank you. I want to help other people too, I am still in the healing. There is a song by Raising Appalachia that I like and one of the lines is “wise men say that rushing is violence, and so is your silence when its rooted in compliance”. [I think its called Medicine woman] I feel like everyone with cptsd can relate to that line. rushing IS violence!

[alaysiakayebutler]

Add this to distracted attention disorder, it is vicious. Yesterday I left the bag of groceries, meant to complete the dishes I'm supposed to be making right now for Thanksgiving tomorrow. Holiday that I've been ostracized from for years, due to interference by npd alienation. Add it up and it's probably no wonder I'm feeling ill instead of excited, seeking solace and confirmation instead of getting on with the tasks I need to complete. But thank you for sharing about the gas pump thing, because I was so furious with myself yesterday when I left that bag of items that I went specifically to the store to get, and I didn't realize it till I got home and realized also that I had been in the midst of a heat flash type of panic attack when I was checking out in the first place and had several more stops to make, but I was denying how overwhelmed I was, which is typical. I'm used to being internally pressured, doing everything under duress but it really made me mad at myself and I couldn't keep going told myself I'd sleep and then I'd be okay today but I'm not

[caleshaboston]

I agree with what you are saying about Mr. Rogers. As a child who grew up in a home where there abuse & I was intensely lonely, Mr. Rogers always made me feel better, even if it was just for an half an hour.

[kelliesmith]

Wow! Wow! Wow! I finally hear somebody who puts words to what I have lived for as long as I can remember (I'm 60 yrs old). I knew I lived through trauma (childhood trauma & adult trauma due to the childhood trauma). I left an extremely abusive marriage of 23 years 19 years ago & have been walking the path of healing since. After that marriage, I experienced more abusive relationships. Now I am in a beautiful 6 year relationship (now 4 1/2 yrs married). I took the CPTSD Quiz & have watched 4 of your videos. I cannot beging to express how it feels to feel seen & heard, yet we've never talked or met! What you talk about resonates on so many levels & having this understanding of what I've experienced, tying so many loose threads that seemed so randomly disconnected are ALL connected, alleviates so much self-doubt. God has give me a gift through you. Thank-You! Thank You for not listening to those bullies & haters! I feel a light shine on a courage inside of me to encourage me to do some things I haven't done due to the bullies & haters in my own life. TY YY TY! 🤗😊

[DarkMoonDroid]

OMG! My Grandparents watched me after school for years too and I watched Mr. Rogers at their house too and yes! He saved my life! I continued to watch Mr. Rogers and Sesame Street well into my older childhood because of the friendliness and respect they showed each other. This was the right way to be in the world. And I needed to bathe my senses in it as much as possible.


But there is something here that doesn't match my experience.
You didn't mention dissociation. Dysregulation may be the Clinical term for exterior behavior, but what's happening on the inside is often dissociation. Clinicians can't always tell when that is happening, and neither can we. It takes alot of self-awareness to see it and there are some good exercises - using writing - for learning to spot it. But this is a much better explanation for why we screw things up so much. Procrastination is not an explanation. It's a behavior. And it's caused by dissociation. And dissociation is caused by brain damage. That's why EMDR works for so many people. It's like hot-wiring the brain, bypassing the key ignition. Then you can follow thru without dissociating. Maybe this is what you're talking about when you say "overwhelm". I don't use that term. But it's important to figure out what we mean by these words so that we can effectively solve the problems.


I'm not an opponent nor hostile.
I am trying to come into attunement and connect.
I've spent so many years being told things about myself that aren't true and it wrecks my sense of self. I have to be assertive when speaking my truth to people who just don't know, and sometimes I have to speak up when people are telling lies about us - intentionally or not. I've been shot at and ignored by all sides for this. But I'm still here.

[mistwalker]

This connection between dysregulation, procrastination, underdelivery and hurry is a great thing to hear. Thank you!

[allypallygally]

Fascinating and totally spot on.
It’s only when I realised I’m rushing through yoga and meditation that I really started to notice this pattern.
Now it makes total sense and explains why I’m so happy and peaceful in nature when things move at their own pace.