How to Start Healing from Emotional Dysregulation

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We have to prioritize connection in order to heal complex trauma and emotional dysregulation. In this clip from '60 Characteristics of Complex Trauma - Part 20/33 - Emotional Dysregulation' , Tim goes through the most important phases of healing to regulate intense emotions that may arise from triggers, like finding rhythm, moving your body, and meeting your 12 Basic Needs.

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[DJ-yjvg]

Trauma is like an iceberg. You can only see the top, the triggers. The reasons are all below the surface of our subconscious.

[headshot]

Hard to find healthy people anymore. Yes, we are very disconnected from one another.

[APOLLINAIREBARTHOLOMIEU]

Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.

[red_disc]

I live in NZ and I can tell you, that Maori culture has tremendous wisdom, the wisdom of nature.

[HappyCat]

Crappy Childhood Fairy has the ‘daily practice’, which I find very helpful for staying regulated. And it’s free, which is great.

[cleber]

I was very embarrassed to talk about the things I was going through, with the time I chose, like other people, some were not healthy, but others were. It is difficult to talk to the victim, in addition to the shame, guilt and fear, there is the feeling that you trust no one, but it is important to face and mature to deal with this. God envies me 4 healthy people, I am very grateful.

[LOVEISTRUTH]

I pray I can connect with people like you Tim Fletcher. People who know LOVE💖💖💖 I am forever Thankful to you for all you do💖

[peachespulaski]

Thank you for doing these shorter ones.

[Ominous]

So playing my bass guitar, tapping my fingers on a phone screen, playing polyrhytms on a drumming app. All the "drumming" with my restless feet I've been doing for years. It only stops when I force my feet to play the rhytm until it's done. All these things are not obsessuve compulsive disorders. In fact they are my bodies response and in fact coping mechanisms at play. A desperate and impressive attempt to calm the body down. It's actually EFT in disguise what I'm doing. Without even knowing why. And I've been doing this for so long, I could also be a percussionist, and I can play drums by nature. I just don't have the money yet to buy the drums and instruments to do it like Lars Ullrich or Mario Duplantier. So I'm stuck to bass guitar. Or any other object that can make a drumming sound. To start with my own chest and hips and arms. Wild rhytms. Complex polyrhytms. Sad Radiohead ish tunes on bass. All to cope and heal the complex trauma.

It's quite a remarkable realisation and a rediscovery that music has indeed been benificial to get me through emotional dysregulation. In many, many ways.

[kahearne]

Triggered too often but learning. Have MS with brainstem lesions and thinking may be partially to blame. Pray+++ YOUR teaching helps much. Though no addiction had traumatic experience over 10 years ago and life experiences that wounded but learning more day by day including forgiving in spite of broken trust. Your work is a gift. Thank you!

[UTP]

Excellent work Tim, meditation does the trick for me, it’s a game changer🧘🏾‍♂️

[tmking]

Can u do lecture on how safe people behave

[jodycasey]

This is what I’m working on, healing my stress system.

[ctlo]

Because we don’t have connection, having all the other tools is not a bad thing at all. Once you’ve healed all that you possibly can, then you can better judge and not run into narc cults whilst unhealed. Blessings.❤

[yigitalpberber]

Does anyone knows whether he has a separate video where he elaborates on Phase 1 - tools to deescalate dysregulated emotions (grounding)

[Ruby-wise]

Thank You so much for this vid…I experienced an event this week to which I repeated old patterns of reactivity..and have been disappointed in myself for three days. This is such a great reminder and check point for me to hone and use the tools I have, but failed to implement under great stress.

[HappinessinYourLife]

I've been a big fan for years. Thank you so much, Tim, for all you do!! This is wonderful. The resetting DOES happen. It does take time and seems boring, but in those weeks or months that the brain is rebuilding, it is so critical to prioritize peace in one's life.

[jcepri]

My phone recently lost connection somehow. The phone number and account completely disconnected from the device and the carrier could not figure out why. I read that this could mean my SIM card was hacked. Well, let me tell you, emotional "disregulation" doesn't even come close to describing what happened to me. I FREAKED! I didn't have phone service for 4 days because I had to wait for them to send me a new phone. When I'm "in it" - and I'm sure many know what I mean - I can't control myself. I was on social media, cursing the phone company and the insurance company because I could not deal with being without a phone. I was like a toddler, red faced, kicking and screaming, because my favorite toy was taken away, and I can't seem to reign it in. These videos are so incredibly educational, but I can't remember what happened to me when I was a child. I'm 61 and I don't see that happening.

[rhondaturner]

I'm so grateful for your channel. Bless you

[MrBrunoUSA]

this was a great summary, so thanks for this.