How to identify a covert narcissist? #mentalhealth #bpd #relationship #personalitydisorders #npd

[ESumner]

Ironically the victims of covert narcissists seem to only understand each other’s experiences… while those who’ve never experienced it just do not get it no matter how much you try to describe it. Invisible abuse… the most insidious form of abuse that can be inflicted on you in public and no one sees it but you and the narcissist. It’s evil.

[khankhalifa]

No one would ever truely understand the extent of your pain whether real or perceived because they are simply not you. And the ones that do come close in understanding are usually the ones who have gone through a similar pain/experience.
What happens with narcissistic individuals is that they think this phenomenon is only unique to them, failing to realise or purposefully turning a blind eye to the fact that it is a common human experience which the wise rise up to and the fools cling on.

[LucyFre]

Behind modesty shyness " gentle soul " you got : no empathy egoist, vindictive not forgiving small things, entitled, highly impulsive. Full of negativism. Passive aggressive. Mainly passive aggressive. It's demon. Human by name only

[etoile_filante]

It’s so crazy because with my nEx it was always about his suffering with depression etc. Even when he cheated on me and later came back with a mediocre apology, he did not really acknowledge my pain and the hurt I went through because of him, but how much he suffered when I left him, how much pressure I put on him etc.

[KtwsN]

How do you tell the difference in covert npd and bpd? They seem identical in many ways

[MichaelJones-jrsf]

I say this because i honestly do feel like no one would, we all experience pain different. When i lash out at my spouse i feel bad but im so angry with whatvwent on between us and now being diagnosed with BPD. Ive tried leaving feeling i was the problem now im just confused. When im not angry i can empathize with anyone but when im angry or even sad i just beat myself up or lash out at others who try to get close thinking its manipulation

[jenlazee]

I can't tell the difference between covert narcissist and my husband's BPD. Please help.
The irony, for me, is that I came from a really hard, pretty white trash background; to survive (and thrive) I was required to overcome many unfortunate events. I have so much sympathy and empathy for my husband, who came from rich neglect. I'm not making a joke when i say "rich" and "neglect" together. It is real. He had everything physically met in his life, except for love and allowing of reactions and feeling of emotions and then being able to talk and make sense and move forward with anything. Because of his upbring, he's confused at other people not reacting the way he did. He feels like he had everything he could physically need and therefore he's not allowed to complain.
And now, not surprisingly, he is a fantastic provider, and so, in the sense that he understands, I, and the children, have everything we need and it is unacceptable, to want more connection or more of anything.
It's like a box was checked and we're done.
I love him so much. I can understand his pain, but I am very frustrated at his lack of empathy and how he views that the way that he sees the world is the way the world is. He thinks he's open-minded, but he's not.

[barbsaenz]

Once you see it, you are never the same. So much makes sense, from their warped point of view. But, wow!

[NunYa-dbjy]

Ty Dr Fox! I saw your video of just stating an example of a symptom. There was no they're a bad person implied in any manner in his presentation. Another symptom is hypervigilance. Dr Fox is a Dr that treats PDs and shamed no one in this short.

[jenp]

Overt narcissism is obvious if you have had to deal with anyone, like this. Covert narcissism is at times, tricky to notice right away. There are also people that are withdrawn because they simply have a quiet nature, and they don’t have patience to deal with drama.

[Nina]

Yes. They LOVE AND LIVE to repeat themselves and repeat their pain in front of you. Regardless of what you say, they make you feel like your going in circles and you either end up feeling drained (if you continue to try and find empathy for them or frustration at how they are almost coming across dumb in their self pity party. - which is always something horrific so even called it out like that you feel like a horrible person! Which they know

[jrg]

What's the difference between the covert narcissist and the fatigued empath who grew up with a covert narc mother who also has real trauma (her mom died when she was 13 and she was in a plaster cast thru high school due to how they used to treat scoliosis)?

[tanjabelegisanin]

Voli da je poznat i bogat. 😊 Bogu Hvala.

[Lolipop]

Is it common for covert narcissist to display strong avoidant attachement?

[EarthAngelReadings]

To be completely honest, I don’t see the problem with wanting your experiences to be your own and not everybody else’s. If you say, “ im going through XYZ” and someone replies, “everyone goes through XYZ.” To me that is invalidating the unique experience that that person is going through. No matter how common the problem is, it is unique to each person experiencing it. Are you talking about a different way? This trait confused me.

[hyperionsolomon]

13 months out and I still cannot tell if it was pathological narcissism or borderline, or both. She was savage.

[KanikaNewsome-pjjb]

Thank you one of the best explanations 🙏🏿🙏🏿

[NunYa-dbjy]

At home always seething with rage until you dare ask them if they'd like a cup of coffee or some such nothing that gets the rage 🤮vomit to come up on you, bc they had to suffer acting like a human adult like everyone else did at work today. Ohhh the suffering they must go through. No one a else at work had a headache or a sore thumb or a financial worry and it was so easy for everyone else in the world to be decent bc none of them suffered *and* had to be decent like they did. Only they, of all the ppl in the world had a headache and a sore thumb and financial worry today. Thats why it was so easy for the rest of the world to not act put upon or mean.

[jackandcokeallmorning]

is there a difference between this and feeling like people often overlook or
are unaware of how much you are suffering? i'm thinking of the experience of BPD and how it feels silently excruciating to a level that most people can't seem to perceive or understand (so it feels like you're often being minimized.) is that a form of covert narcissism? or something separate? is the difference in how you express and process it? (holding space for others' experiences, checking your perceptions against facts, accepting feedback etc.)

[ALGARIC]

Anyone else feels like vulnerable (covert) narcissist is just a pwNPD comorbid with BPD?