How being around narcissists makes you inefficient

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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.

THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.

[dangitbobby.]

"You're not dumb, you're just buried under all this negative talk"
That made me burst into sobs, hit too close to home for me.

[Lindsay-Makes-Videos]

This is toooo real. Painfully real. I recently said "I spent my whole life working and yet I'm always broke, I spent my whole life living for other people and now I'm alone." This is EXACTLY why. The time I have wasted overanalyzing my choices trying to figure out how it was going to affect my mother has utterly ruined my life. ...So far. My therapist always tells me to remember that I'm awake NOW, and some people don't wake up at all. Better to have some life left than none at all.

[samk]

This channel is so validating! I finally feel seen and heard and it's helping me heal! Thank you doc!❤️

[annabee]

I noticed that the more that I heal, the more that I achieve, and the higher I climb in life...the more AGGRESSIVE the abuse. Now that I can heal from no contact, I realized that I have the most powerful weapon against them: my success & happiness. That knowledge alone gets me through each difficult day and allows me to let go of any desire for petty revenge.

[maryfisher]

Isn't it interesting that the narcs closest to us hate our hobbies. Husbands, sons daughters. As soon as we separate ourselves from them with our own interests they just hate it!

[somayehsheikhi]

Because they never give us the time and opportunity to say our needs, feelings, desires or to show our abilities. They never see us.

[dianastella]

My Goodness. That feeling of inadequacy around narcissistic people is the worst thing, because you never know if it is you the useless one or they. After years of knowing about narcissism, I still battle with it.

[taaliyah]

Almost a year since I left. I’m back to my intelligent, quick witted self and able to get things done. I have ownership over my life again! To anyone else struggling to leave, or have let opportunities pass you by, its okay. There are always chances to get back out there to make your dreams come true💜

[tbd]

Because you’re always spending your energy trying to survive their abuse.

[sindiswamoolman]

The anxiety messes up my thought process.

[gingergirl]

Once again, Dr., I feel like you are telling my life story. I was never enough for my parents or husband. However, at work I was confident, competent and efficient. At home I was a blithering idiot because that is how I was always treated. I was married to a professional student who told me I was too stupid to go back to college. Funny, after he died I went back to college, carried a 4.0 gpa and made the Americas Dean's list every semester. After my abusers died I realized how strong, tough and smart I really am.

[louilind]

I am almost 30 and I am finally learning to be more structured. First step was self love, second a Marie Kondo madness, third adding lots of routines to my life. I have a long fixed morning routine checklist now. It has helped me to stop feeling overwhelmed when I wake up. This is the year where I have stopped being a reactive creature and has become the leader of my own life.

[carolinavillanueva]

They’re like a sponge that absorb all the our energy and all the good

[jonisoma]

...I worry about people who don’t know this...I wish every one knew about this.

[lucygoose]

I hope I can have the privilege to meet you someday and thank you in person. You are giving away precious gifts to us, your listeners. Bless you Dr. Ramani!!!🤗

[EyeToTheSkyPerth]

It’s hard to be efficient when you have narcissist in your life who is usually very inefficient themselves and sending crazy mixed messages to you and making you lose your sense of reality. I could never think straight around my ex narc. let alone anything else. As soon as he was gone... clarity and function resumed!

[reneemorgan]

Omg....this has been me. I've been no contact for about 4 years now and I'm just now being able to focus and get goals accomplished. The psychological ruminating and negativity is real. I'm grateful to have a better prospective on life. I am in control of me at age 59, I feel better than I have....ever. It can be done, keep on keeping on. Bless you all💜

[desiderata]

Thirty years under the ravages of COVERT Narcissistic abuse with my ex husband. I knew he was odd but it was only later that realized how horrible he actually is. I have lost SO MUCH and so has my daughter. 😭It’s been two months and I’m leaning how to breathe. I also have a narc mother so I was programmed from childhood to be supply for these vultures! It is a miracle I’m still alive. 😭💔💔💔

[sannawiklund]

I'm almost crying now... thank you, thank you for putting this into words so simply and accessibly. I've had this feeling all my life that I'm just fighting to keep my nose above water, being held down by a ball in chain, while my peers happily swim the race of life, and now I can finally understand why. I'm 44 and haven't gotten anywhere; I own nothing, never a relationship, and in the last few years I've sunk even deeper to the point where I have no job and have had to move in with my N parent.... I see no light in the tunnel. The cognitive dissonance of "what I could have been", as a top student (and even a Mensa member), is deafening and I'm trying really hard to show myself forgiveness and kindness but always have the feeling that other people wonder why I haven't accomplished anything in life and are judging me for it. My N parents certainly do!

[suzanautry]

I do agonize over the time I waste. Thank you for this video.