What A Narcissist's Anger Really Means

When narcissists become angry, they want you to feel as if you are faulty and deficient. But, as Dr. Les Carter points out, the intensity of a narcissist's anger indicates how they have much hidden tension that they have not come to terms with. It is essential for you to know and understand the real reason for their anger, so you will not succumb to their self-serving accusations.

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Dr. Les Carter is a best selling author and therapist who has semi-retired to Waco, TX. In the past 40+ years he has conducted more than 65,000 counseling sessions and many workshops and seminars. He specializes in anger management and narcissistic personality disorder.

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[kingbee]

The narcissist becomes angry when the scapegoat isn't following the "rules".

[iononcantomascrivo]

A narcissist’s anger is comparable to a toddler who hasn't learned how to regulate their emotions yet. Seeing an adult in their 50s lose her mind with rage, because she didn't get her way or was told no, is quite the unnerving sight.

[sturobertson]

They twist an entirely innocent situation into something it's not and then get angry about it

[lacecurtainirish]

In my experience, the narcissist’s anger came out when they were losing some level of control or there was a challenge to their sense of superiority. And generally speaking, the level of anger directly correlated to their perceived level of injury.

[smorgasbroad]

They're always the first to tell you what's wrong with you. But never themselves.

[kungfupanda]

Everything a narcissist is "afraid" of being perceived exactly who they are.

[IndianOutlaw]

They perceive everything as an attack, no matter how insignificant and/or benign.

[sandrathomas]

They've learned along the way that their anger reaction works for them to intimidate others from looking behind the curtain where a terrified vulnerable child hides inside an adult body.

[charmee]

The only word to describe this level of anger is "demonic" because its as if someone or something takes over and the person is possessed I only saw it a few times and it was terrifying. I never went back. To this day it haunts me. These people are not people as we know them. They have morphed into a separate species with very few human qualities.

[angellacanfora]

It's amazing how the anger is always burbling right below the surface, how the smallest thing can set them off. It makes it so you can never let down your guard around them, ever.

[markleisa]

They get mad when things don't go their way, when they lose control over you and you don't do things their way.

[tbunnyshy]

I think it means they can’t handle when we are stable, peaceful and unaffected by their mental games and tactical moves.

[rnotalther]

Best idea is get out . Stay away from the narcissist. They will get violent and vindictive.

[xGroteskx]

No one else is allowed to express anger, especially towards them even if they did or said something to cause you feel anger.

[amandaliverpool]

Anger can make people fear them. But, it's usually their own emotions that they fear. The more scared they are. The more angry they are. In my opinion!

[secondhorizon]

Narcissists can never be exposed as bad or wrong ~ without suffering an injury to their (false-self) dignity ~ which then erupts as uncontrolled indignation/anger/tantrums. This explains their tiresome habit of endlessly arguing or "right-fighting" even when they are plainly and obviously wrong or at fault.

[themekfrommars]

It means they have lost control of their capacity to keep shame away, and they are feeling shame. The anger is an attempt to project their shame onto the target and render them "all bad "so the narcissist can be "all good". I'm getting good at this... maybe I'll be able to survive Christmas lunch with my parents...!

[marieldavison]

The worst is when they try to de-motivate you with their anger.
Once on my first day at a new job I was called out of meeting to take a phone call where my now ex spouse proceeded to yell and swear at me because my two step kids 12 & 10 (his children) didn't know what to put in their lunch. (With a fully stocked fridge I might add!) I had to go back to the meeting acting as if nothing had happened ~ I knew my marriage was over ~ my independence was too much for him.

[maryw]

Their anger means they are guilty of what you are accusing them of doing and don't want you to try to hold them accountable for it

[uvvxxid]

When you say no and when they can't control you all hell will break loose sign Cynthia Smith