Narcissistic Parents: Odd Ways they Left You To Raise Yourself (ALONE)

In this video, I talk about the odd ways narcissistic parents left you to raise yourself. Learning about this will help you overcome the neglect and help you finally stand strong in your self-differentiation journey.

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Jerry Wise, MA, MS, CLC, has helped 10,000s of people heal from family dysfunction and become the true self they were never allowed to be. As a family systems and self-differentiation coach, he leverages 45 years of experience to help clients permanently break free from family-of-origin dysfunction, cultivate healthy relationships, and build a strong sense of self.

****DISCLAIMER: THIS VIDEO IS NOT INTENDED TO SUBSTITUTE FOR PROFESSIONAL COUNSELING. BE SURE TO CONSULT A PROFESSIONAL TO HELP YOU INTEGRATE AND UTILIZE THESE CONCEPTS.****

[jerrywise]

Finally get your family OUT OF YOU & be the true self you were never allowed to be 👇

[anajackson]

And as an adult when I become overwhelmed and ask for help, my parents scream, "YOU'RE AN ADULT!!! I'M NOT TAKING CARE OF YOU!!!" And you also didn't take care of me as a child. How ironic.

[estellepatella]

Narcissists are the worst parents ever. They emotionally and mentally abuse you in so many insidious ways that can make you feel insane.

[denisevincent]

The Siamese cat raised me. She was kind, patient and loving.

[omyota]

Anyone else buy themselves little gifts, or do nice things for yourselves, on Mother's and Father's day, because you raised yourself?

[stolensilver]

I didn’t realise how dysfunctional my family was until, as an adult, I spent an afternoon with another family on an outing. I was gobsmacked at the interaction between them and the relaxed atmosphere. I thought I was in a different universe.

[leeluna]

My psychiatrist did an "ideal parent" exercise with me where I listed the qualities I wanted in a father. He reviewed the list, paused for a moment of thought and said I just described myself, adding, congratulations you don't need him anymore.

[knitpurl]

I was verbally, emotionally and psychologically abused. Isolated, controlled and put down. It's become a lifelong struggle.

[eliav]

Don't treat yourself the way your parents treated you. Wow.

[Mouse_]

anyone else get really confused or otherwise overwhelmed with feelings when you see a healthy child/parent interaction ?

[BingoMomi]

Having short conversations with my doctor, she once said, "That's from always being in survival mode".

[ChuangSarah]

My parents teach me NOTHING. They didn’t raise me. They bullied, mocked, ridiculed me. Yet they expected me to take care of my younger sisters when I was just a young child.It’s not that they’re poorly educated or poor. They’re actually highly educated & had enough $ to hire a maid or babysitter. They just don’t want to be bothered with any parental responsibility. What’s even more sickening is they have built this perfect parent image to outsiders 😩🤦🏻‍♀️

[laurabarber]

🤔I always wondered how i was supposed to teach myself something i didn't know, yet knew i need to know it. I wasn't parented - I raised myself. 😵‍💫 It's exhausting to be in a perpetual life of "catching up"!😵‍💫

[gardenjoy]

"We're just thrown to the wolves out there." Every child, who has faced emotional and educational neglect. We were not guided. We were not taught to prevent or solve any conflicts, we were startled by angry outbursts of parents when we did something wrong (but they never taught us how to do any better). Life becomes incredibly unsafe and unreliable. The abuse at home sets you up for abuse outside of the home and you've learned no coping mechanisms. So we fall into aggression and/or depression. We are set up to fail on every front. BUT we Can heal. It takes time and tears.

[glendaruiz]

I never want to see my narcissistic mother ever again, I won't even attend her funeral if she dies before me, and I don't want her going to mine! After all the abuse and suffering she has put me through intentionally, she has stolen so many things from me, I was always the outcast from the dysfunctional family, thank God I'm not like any of them! I rather be the scapegoat than to be a demon in disguise! No contact.

[StephieC]

The thing my parents taught me the most is what not to be...cruel, mean, unkind and utterly self centered

[ladyinwaiting]

My mother gave me the greatest gift of my life the day she said I'd grow up to be just like her. I suddenly realized I possessed a secret power, she could not control who I would be one day. For the last 50+ years, I have lived every day trying to be what she was not. Sometimes only we understand the true jewel within ourselves. Treasure it, polish it in secret if necessary, until the day you can reveal your true worth.

[Leah-ie]

They make a point of doing the minimum for the scapegoat, that's for sure. I think narc parents don't understand why they need to protect six year old children. They think the kid should be standing on its own two feet!

Narc parents simply hate being parents.

[nomadicgamer]

They really do set yourself up for failure. :( I relate to all of these, alas.

[lisamarriott]

They neglected me and abused me so much to make me codependent and weak but this just made me independent and stronger, I don't need them and they hate it. 😂