Why Cptsd Behaviors Like Loneliness Push People Away

Hello Beautiful Soul - I put up as many videos as possible to help individuals that have trauma either due to toxic relationships or a difficult upbringing learn how to become who they were meant to be had the trauma not happened. Your core persona is not gone - s/he may be buried underneath the trauma - but s/he is still there!!!

If the videos are not enough - if you are hopping from video to video yet still struggle to experience real and lasting shifts in your life, here are some links for other resources that you can check out and see if any are a good fit for you:

[garybills]

I have been basically emotionally abandoned my whole life

[dianep]

So much nicer to just be with animals. People are too damn complicated.

[anastasijabeograd]

wow ! I think I have this problem
no friends, feeling lonely but doesn‘t even want to communicate as much with ppl
they drown my energy & I always feel weird or not as NORMAL as them bc I had childhood trauma (narcisstic abusive father & narcisstic immature mother) I also grew up very lonely in my room
Often I feel like my coworkers can look through me and notice that I‘m „not as good or normal as them“

[garybills]

I said goodbye to love. I’m just too nice and gullible and naive

[whatsgoingon]

SO TRUE! I feel afraid of men, and people in general. If I am myself or express negative or vulnerable emotions or events, I'll be re-written (invalidated), criticized, shamed, ridiculed, worse, punished and abandoned (like my Narc mom did!)

[Isabelmaryj]

This is why it's so hard - you get hurt by the narc spouse or whoever and then you feel that loneliness and you want to pour your heart out to the next friend or relationship and boom you can attract another narc because the love bombing feels sooo good. For a while. Michele is right. I found out kind of by accident that I could start listening to myself and not mind if I was by myself for a while. It was lonely but then I realised that I was starting to listen to myself just for a bit, just with a bit more kindness than before. It's certainly a journey to healing, there is no quick fix. Thank you so much for your wonderful insights Michele.

[bchristian]

I've realized I have this problem and have basically withdrawn from society and relationships because I'm tired of the only relationships I can ever attract being those who want to take advantage of me, but I can't "be there for myself" without going no contact with my family, because their hooks still have me strongly.

[lydias.coaching]

Learning emotional regulation can help with this.

[MCognettaable]

The only thing I don’t understand about life is how is it we that are trying to get our needs met and are genuinely lonely and always meet ppl that detect this and pull away, like you said, and why narcissists are essentially trying to do a similar thing yet always seem to find victims to manipulate and get their needs met through? But the unfair part of life is most of the ppl we are talking about here have cptsd and would reallly benefit from just 1 person being kind and quenching just some of our loneliness and isolation and just restore our hope in humanity after what we went through versus the narc who has zero good intentions, isn’t hurting and just wants to abuse/control…how is this fair? And it’s oxymorons like this that make me question god and life and how it always seems like the worst of humanity gets everything they want, and ppl truly suffering just keep falling short and most likely were abused/neglected In childhood when they had zero choice, and then over and over and over again before even realizing things like this we are learning now! Ugh it’s just so unfair and doesn’t make sense to me! Narcs were also most likely abused and took a “different path” to getting their needs met, but it’s like THEY GET THEIR NEEDS MET though 🙄 and ppl like us don’t, we just get more pain and more abuse because that’s what our parents set us up for? Anyone have any advice or thoughts?? 🙏

[TrustInTheUniverse]

The biggest struggle is finding meaningful work while dealing with CPTSD to get out of toxic environments

[reallifepsych]

I’ve never clicked a video so fast. Thank you for this!

[phoenixrising]

The guilt & shame of feeling overwhelmed with angst & anxiety for feeling discombobulated can be debilitating & confusing.
Trauma transcends words for so many it’s a challenge to even figure out what you’re experiencing. It’s important to know that there is light at the end of the tunnel. There is Hope
to overcome the dysfunction 🙏

[Canaday]

The exploitations insults belittling berating mocking and invalidations from the malignant narcissist alcoholic ex I divorced whenever my children and I expressed any emotions or feelings has created so much c-ptsd, anxieties
Crippling Social issues, low self esteem, ocd,
Lack of ambitions and drive

[gracebellinger]

I been pushing people away because I'm so scared that they will find out what I been hiding

[runlolarun]

Yep, catch 22. It is hard to understand how it feels like you are doing time for others abuse. Because it is hard to regulate ourselves it can drive others away, then you are lonely on top of that which drives others away, then the trauma of being so alone makes it harder to trust anyone at all even if they stick around.

[fitnesswithwasif]

Can u do a video on why after truama it feels like you are living your past life in the present over and over again like same kind of people same circumstances that brought trauma in the past

[johnpaul]

Your smile can save lives Michele Thank you

[kates]

I am in this right now....in unhappy relationship with narc...can't get out....don't know how. Because of him I have no job, constantly yelled at, can't share emotions, thoughts....you nailed it....he NEVER sees me & makes fun of my "fake" crying. I live in house with Silent treatment . I left last year, but proved to him my stupidity by going back...

[hanswollo]

I really feel weird saying this because I don't even know if you read anything I say but I'll say it anyway. I sincerely apologize if I have ben anyway rude or insensitive... especially about the last comment I made. I read your story about your parents and everything you've been through...I have no motives all I ever tried to do is make you smile and laugh and even maybe make your day go better. I truly have learned a lot from your videos...I am a police officer with the phoenix pd and I've seen first hand what the effects of narcissism can be...it doesn't only result in mental abuse but also physical...I'm going to end this by saying to keep doing what your doing...your are not only helping people to heal...but you are also maybe saving lives. Thought I'd tell you that...

[janisgaines]

This really resonated with me. The way you explained how we emotionally abandon ourselves was helpful. Also, I like the phrase “emotional hydration.” I used to use the term “emotional slut” to describe that over sharing/desperation for validation that you mentioned. I’ve come a long way but still work to be done!