The Number One Reason Traumatized People Pull Away

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Isolating is an almost universal symptom of PTSD from childhood – or for anyone with wounds from trauma. There’s what it looks like from the outside. But the real reason you silate may not be becuase you want to be alone; chances are, you long for love and connection, and to belong in a community of friends. Find out in this video the REAL reason why traumatized people tend to hold themselves apart from others.

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[rossk]

How is it that I’ve gone to 4 different therapists over the years and tried to articulate the symptoms and felt unheard or like I have something unfixable wrong with me and I’m just doomed. Yet, you talk about this and it’s honestly like you’ve watched my life and you are describing how I’ve been living in precise detail? This is the first time ever that it feels like someone understands and I’m not just some defective human with insurmountable problems that are only my experience/problem.

[sheilagunn]

the sun is setting, and i finally got out of bed today . I just wanted someone to know I made it.

[dgvfsa]

Being around people is exhausting. I'd rather be alone.

[rvjzfuj]

It is better to be alone than with someone abusive or toxic.😊

[kkelly]

Not ever have I regretted isolating. Not ever do I feel lonely when I am alone. But I do regret being with people often.

[keturahspencer]

"We need to be socialized or we get rusty." Some of us never knew how to socialize to begin with.

[queenofwater]

I find that the older I have gotten, the more I isolate. So much hurt and pain in my past…I’m often tortured by it.

[AbelieverofourLord]

I'm 56 and I've isolated most of my adult years. I love it - no jealous friends to cut your throat or "loving" family to use you dry.
Socializing may work for some, but cut off from the world is the happiest life for me.
Many Blessings to All...

[FifiR]

Only a few days ago I spoke the words: "I will rather live and die alone in this world than be hurt by another person I cared for." If there is nobody to hurt me, I cannot be hurt. I will take solitude over hurt any day.

[bnzxxyp]

Isolation has saved my life while destroying it.

[RC-tgmt]

For me it's survival - I isolate to survive when it all gets too much.

[shirleygardiner]

I love being alone! It’s healing. I heard a lady say (concerning Christmas)...”I tell my friends I’m going to be with family...and I tell my family I’m going to be with friends...and I stay home alone...and just love it”! I’m using that one!!!

[KatArt]

Been burned too many times. I’m a magnet to narcissists. I try to open back up and get sucker-punched again. Maybe I’m just bad at this. I’m safe, happy, and alone but not lonely. I read, I do my art, I cook, a walk at the park every day with my dog, I went back to college (online of course - lol). I finally found myself. I bought my own house in 2020 and am enjoying the solitude. I’ve gone no contact with my abusers and I have learned to set clear boundaries for myself. I’m fine where I am. People are vicious! I will surround myself with animals, books, and my art. I will never again let anyone else hurt me. I’m happy. 😊❤

[linjicakonikon]

I'm 70 and twice divorced. I've been alone for 10 years and have felt peace and contentment for the first time in my life. I dont avoud people but I no longer seek connection. I'm fine. We all die alone.

[brandonjohnson]

Exact reason why i choose to spend christmas alone because they showed me who they truly are and im prepared to except whatever comes with it. Rather be alone than being with narcs and fake people and yes ive gotten good at being aolne. Thank you for this video. Merry Christmas

[moniquefleming]

I've been this way my whole life. I had to force myself to be a photojournalist in the military for 23 years. I did it and retired successfully. But then went into isolation again.
Finally, last year I moved to a remote town near my brother, who I hadn't seen in 45 years. He went thru the horrible trauma with me growing up.
His wife is so happy I moved nearby. He's happier, so am I. We go hiking, biking, kyacking, shooting, cooking together. We both joined a pottery class to force ourselves out of our hermit lives. Lol
It sounds weird, but we kept each other alive, fed, and protected as children in a horrible living situation, and we feel safe when we are together. I'm making friends separately now with a support system. My brother and I can talk about our past when no one else would understand it. It's therapeutic.

[mlw]

When something negative happens to you once and you withdraw, that's an overreaction. When it happens over and over and over and you withdraw, that's just you acknowledging the preponderance of the evidence.

[isabellaflorentina]

After years and years of reaching out and trying to keep relationships alive, I have given up on these one way family, friends, romantic, etc. I am a beautiful person inside and out with so much love to give to others but it is always one way. This christmas i refused to do it again. I stayed by myself, took a long walk, made good food, laughed at funny shows. Honestly i feel more connected with you people on this commebt thread than i do with my own family members. Not one even texted or called to say merry Christmas. I am sorry for everyone else going through the same thing and i wish you all a better 2024.

[Theanchoritegarlic]

Imagine all the group think, gossip and manipulation you've been missing!

[wendysusanlovejoy]

I just turned 70. I have never had a long-term romantic relationship. The only long-term friendship I have had is with someone who seems to like me better when I'm in need. I do feel like life has passed me by. I watched my mother shut herself off from life, and it took her seven years to die. I don't want to do that, so I force myself to get out, take classes, and meet people. People seem to think I'm bubbly, friendly, and outgoing, and although I can talk to pretty much anyone, I feel so lonely, I just want to curl up and die. I do not see a bright future. Recently, I have begun spending more time alone in my apartment, and I feel better. I don't feel so lonely. I don't spend so much time crying. I may be isolating, but, honestly, I haven't felt so good in a very long time.