We Don't Understand Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) Very Well - Jordan Peterson

Speaker: Jordan Peterson Thanks for watching!
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[carsongould]

I dated a girl with BPD and this is about the most accurate way I’ve heard someone articulate this into words. Extremely interesting!

[tylercampbell]

I am no psychologist however, I have been surrounded by these descriptions for years and it's so painful and hurtful to see. The best thing to learn from the other side, in my experience is, do you're very best not to take things too personally. To those afflicted, know you're not a bad person, know that people love you and those that are closest are inevitably going to let you down. This hits so close to home. I've spent the last 3 1/2 years reading psychology to better understand those close to me and to help understand myself better. This man has really helped me.

[GlmySunday]

I have BPD and rather mild Bipolar II, I was pretty much a lost cause for a long time and if you'd asked me only a year and a half ago, if I'd be here today, I'd probably have laughed in your face. I wasn't even sure wether I'd be alive the next day. Today, I'm continuing University and am working torwards my PhD in Medicine, I've finally found healthy and productive strategies that I even enjoy. I made the move to the big City that I had wanted so badly for so long, got a job to support myself even more and I'm in a healthy relationship with myself and the people around me. I even enjoy alone time now. I found love for life and I'm stil working out who I am exactly, but I have a pretty good understanding of who I am in general and who I want to be one day. I haven't cut or self harmed in any way for over a year now. And I'm writing my story down in hopes that it might someday help others. I'm going to specialize in Psychiatry, Psychotherapy and Neurology, but I also want to conduct research and studies. I wouldn't be here without some brilliant people who supported me and gave me not only hope, but actual perspective. I understand BPD pretty well now and I was at my worst when I wasn't challenged, when I was bored. I've always had a high curiosity and I would soak up information like a sponge. I won't lie to you: I was a horrible person to myself and others. Toxic, manipulative, impulsive, reckless, I used to be all of that. And as much as I regret that, I don't regret my past because there is no use in regret alone. Regret alone won't change a thing. There is however use in actively learning from the past, in confrontation, in admitting your mistakes and in informing yourself. I am so happy I didn't manage to destroy my mental abilities, because they're my greatest asset. And so is self reflection now. I love thinking, writing, drawing, science and using my brain in any way possible. There is hope, there is stability and there is healing. It's very complex and there is no cure-all, but I desire to play my part in ending the hopelessness and stigma that's connected with BPD diagnosis in so many patients AND therapists. This is not the end. We're at a beginning here and if you feel like Dr. Jordan Peterson described now, let me tell you: It doesn't have to keep being let alone end this way. I used to be where you are now, it seemed neverending, it felt so deeply dark and bitter and I stil have lows, but they are nothing, NOTHING compared to what they used to be. I'm thinking about making a YT channel for that now, but I'm not sure if I should wait a bit. Please let me know if you read this. Also, I had the luck to have a Psychiatrist like Jordan Peterson and I will forever be grateful. These kind of professionals are very rare and the very best.

[kerridocherty]

I suffer BPD, as soon as I heard the first part of the first sentence I knew he was talking about me.
Presumption of abandonment is 100 correct for me.
I’ve stayed single for years because of my fears.
Impulsivity. Through the roof!

[sugoiharris]

This stems from attachment disorders in childhood, basically the adult dx of an attachment disorder. That generally comes from serious trauma related to their relationship with their mother sometime between conception and 4 or 5 years old. Most people I see with an attachment disorder had something seriously traumatic that interrupted attachment with mom. That’s why they always feel like they will be abandoned. It’s ingrained in the core of their brain, the part that regulates our body and takes over for survival. They literally believe that abandonment is guaranteed and that in order to survive they have to push people away and yet they want to desperately cling to them. It’s very confusing for them and the people around them. I’ve had an unfortunate amount of experience with this. Not as someone that has it, but as someone who works in behavior health.

[charityhope]

This is the BEST description I’ve ever heard. God bless each and every person suffering.

[louisecook]

A brilliant depiction of BPD, my wife has it, after many years of very specialised therapy she is more aware of what she is doing and works to counter it using the tools she has been taught. It took years to get where we are, with a great many tears along the way

[essenceocean]

This is a beautiful description for something that ends so tragically.

I knew what she had, how she thought, and how she acted. I understood her. Maybe 1 person knew her better.
But I was a child and she chose to abuse me. Eventually, she forced me to leave her. The guilt I went through for abandoning my own mother and a woman whose worst fear was abandonment was crushing.
But a kid has no power. And shouldn’t have felt that level of responsibility to help her. She was supposed to take care of me.

Bipolar disorder can be triggered by high stress environments plus genetics. My cousin on my dad’s side had bipolar and I’ve never been under more stress than with my mom. So it’s, unfortunately, quite possible living with her triggered my bipolar.
Now, because I’m bipolar, if I have a kid there’s a 50% chance my child will have a mental illness. But that means I can adopt and give a child somewhere hope.

[LHydro]

The way he gets emotional yet is still so articulate at the end. Thank you for having empathy for the core of our hopelessness.

[beanybway]

My ex definitely had this condition, it really messed me up for a bit. After listening to JP and others it helped me to heal and now I understand it a bit better!

[dasherviewed]

At times I feel Aristotle has entered his soul.every word is filled with love, caring emotions. Well seasoned intellectual of the highest degree, indeed.

[PixiePulz]

I have suffered greatly from bPD.
I am just now learning why I have felt
Detached my entire life and this explains so much. I e become a PhD in my illness. I hope I can help others -💕

[Foggy_Til_Noon]

Omg. I used to be JUST like this. Til I finally grew up in a way and understood my own self sabotaging ways and now am very certain and happy with my identity.

[julielevesque]

I suffer so much because of this I don t know how to be anymore so I chose to stay alone and isolate myself. I can t love because it s too intense I m too intense and they run. And I need to be loved and held so badly. I m dying inside because of this heartbreak. Because us humans are not meant to be alone all the time but it s what I prefer to protect myself from people

[crisstopherhagen]

Wish every doctor had his point of view.

[observeroflife]

Psychology is all about diagnosing a problem without understanding how to fix it the majority of the time.

The thing is he gave the answer to the problem within his own comment.

Abandonment causes PTSD that has been mislabeled as "borderline personality".

It is a misfire in the brain caused by trauma that created a faulty connection in their brain.

That is one of the easiest things to cure.

Just because they WERE abandoned doesn't mean that they have to forever remain in that mindset. ALL they need is to feel loved, valued, and like they have worth. ANYONE can do that for them. Literally anyone. But nobody does because they are looking at the symptoms instead of the problem.

Human beings are fully capable of healing themselves emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. All they need is to learn to trust again, and they need others to show them they CAN trust again.

I literally just watched a video where he was talking about twisting reality and how it always snaps back eventually...

Well this is the same thing in a different manner. THEIR reality has been twisted by someone else, and they need help getting back to real reality... Where everyone isn't out to abandon you.

That literally defines PTSD... Which is really the root cause of almost every "mental illness" psychology has "diagnosed".

"Mental illness" is a blanket term for, "I have no idea what is causing this or how to fix it. Let's give them some pills and tell them THAT will fix it." 👍

[wings]

Absolutely! Having had a relationship with someone suffering from BPD, EVERY symptom/characteristic Jordan mentions is classic and present.
It's a tragic disorder for the sufferer, and can be terrible for those having relationships with them, causing long-term scarring and difficulty in forming healthy relationships in the future

[virginiaandrade]

Yes. I had a fractured relationship with my mother from a young age resulting from her mental illness with which she was very rejecting. The last child of three she never wanted to have, I wasn't good or prized in any way so I acted out. I know why I did the things I did, I could never understand my wisping emptiness and lack of attachment to real identity. The impulsiveness and tendency toward self abuse and pushing away of people that wanted to be close. Those were the harder things for me to understand.

[annettestadt]

Also people who live with this often have suicidal ideation

[carriesweeney]

This reminds me of my oldest daughter. Breaks my Fng. heart!