What are the 10 BPD Dos and Don'ts you need to know!

This video goes over common BPD Dos and Don'ts that often come up for my clients. Do you have them too? Check out the video and find out.

Dos:
1. Do make sleep a priority. Sleep routine, sleep is critical
2. Do practice pause all the time
3. Do always practice Radical Acceptance
4. Do find and support your sense of meaning and purpose
5. Do find kindness and compassion for yourself, and live it.

Don'ts:
1. Don't give in to those old, reflexive maladaptive habits.
2. Don't abuse substances - alcohol and drugs
3. Don't accept the belief that you're less than
4. Don't give in to the negative belief that you deserve to feel pain to be ok; self-punishment is a hoax.
5. Don't believe your BPD lens, it's tricky and false. Live your authentic life, this means shades of grey, not B&W (splitting)

Daniel J. Fox, Ph.D., is a licensed psychologist in Texas, international speaker, and a multi-award winning author. He has been specializing in the treatment and assessment of individuals with personality disorders for over 15 years in the state and federal prison system, universities, and in private practice. His specialty areas include personality disorders, ethics, burnout prevention, and emotional intelligence.

He has published several articles in these areas and is the author of:

Thank you for your attention and I hope you enjoy my videos and find them helpful and subscribe. I always welcome topic suggestions and comments.

[manelyset]

Do:
- Make sleep a priority. Make a night routine.
- Practice pause, to help stop all the bad thoughts and behaviors, before you end up giving in. Be better to say to yourself “Stop, pause. This is not an emergency. It’s going to be okay.” Just slow down and don’t act. Just stop.
When you press “pause”, then reevaluate… Where am I? What am I doing?.. Get centered and be mindful of the situation.
- Do always practice radical acceptence.
- Do find and support your sense of meaning and purpose
- Do find kindness and compassion for yourself and live it and express it


Dont:
- Don’t give in to those old, reflexive habits. (Instead make other healthy strategies to evoid selfharm and other bad habits.)
- Don’t abuse alcohol and drugs
- Don’t accept the belief that you’re less than.
- Don’t give in to the negative belief that you deserve to feel pain to be okay. Self-punishment a hoax
- don’t believe your BPD lens. It’s tricky and false. Live your life. This means, life is shades of grey and not just black and white.

[Nat-hugq]

Your work book and DBT has helped a lot alongside psychiatrics check ups. I am awful at a sleep routine, I still need to work on this. Hi my BPD friends, I love you all 💖

[mandyjames]

You have a beautiful energy that is unbelievably healing. You demonstrate constantly exactly how to see those with BPD. It's a course for all of us in support. I realise now how I've enabled things to escalate through my own lack of presence, invariably invalidating my bpd friend through frustration of not having understood what was happening for her.

[ABCDEFG]

This is what we BPDs need. Solution to our problem not listening about our bad traits all the time. Thank you for being such a nice therapist.❤

[projoebiochem]

Sometime I hate YouTube ads. We're watching this, and it talks about "Don't use drugs, " and then and ad interrupts advertising THC gummies! AAARRRGGHHH! I'm trying to help a friend with BPD, and Dr. Fox is giving great advice, and YouTube interrupts with the most tone deaf ad possible!

[edensiou]

I have untreated bpd and ur videos never failed to make me feel good

[augiemay]

Thank you so much Dr. Fox. I'm an adult who can barley financially get by and sure as hell can't afford therapy. You're videos and worksheets have helped me out SO MUCH!! I am eternally grateful to you. 🙏🙏 The work is never done, but the change of me from a few years ago to now is amazing. A long way to go but never thought I'd be here. 💜🙏💜

[darkwatergeekette]

I think this 25 min video did for me what the last 5 years in therapy failed to do. Simple and beautifully explained! I especially loved the cat comparison, it was on point!

[patriciastewart]

Pause, restraint.
I went to a meeting on my road today.
My main goal was to NOT do any maladaptive aggressive thoughts, words or deeds today.
I did a good job.
Got through the yoga class attended also by a couple of people I had previously alienated with the characteristic aggressive snark.
Kept PAUSING, being restrained.
I was conscious of having had a bit too much COFFEE, but, not the worst toxic, mind altering substance.
I did my best, paid full price, and got hugs.
Left when it was done.
Not a lingerer....

[qxkhfpp]

Dude…. I’m not full on BPD… I’ve been sort of categorized as a quiet BPD but not quite fully diagnosed because my therapist is still trying to figure me out as am I lol but I just wanted to let you know that I resonate with a lot of your videos and I appreciate what you do on YouTube especially for the people that can’t afford therapy or the people that just want to reinforce what they’re already learning… You’re amazing… I’ll probably post this on more than one video to try to make sure you see it lol… Thank you again and have a good day

[bevanbuckwheatshea]

Sleep, exercise, get outdoors. Eat good healthy foods. No drugs or smoking or alcohol. Stay away from negative people.

[laylaluna]

“The first one is you want to make sleep a priority” *me watching this at 4:00 am* 🤫🥴😬😬 working on it!! Hehe

Thank you so much once again for being the most understanding and knowledgeable person on this topic. Thank you for the much needed reminders. 🧡 we love you dr fox 🦊

[andyreyerson]

Thank you so much! I'm 35 and after years of terrible struggling and suffering, therapy, hospitalization, medications, addictions, etc... Finally I found (on my own) that I have BPD. Your content has been life changing, and I can't thank you enough. I've watched this one over and over to memorize and make it habitual.

[jennifermaxine]

Most people I'm around I'm very empathetic & kind to...its the Narcissist that kept me in that black & white thinking...I've started to learn being comfortable in my own skin. Now I stick up for myself against bullies & I dont stoop to their level anymore. No more people pleasing a narcissist, nor do I have high expectations from entitled people like that, who will only disappoint & betray, and repeat old cycles.

[goldahashemzukhn-viren]

Seven year old boy curious of why folks do things they do...your clients are blessed!

[gabbyacuna]

So true about sleep!! Seriously I can’t function at all with little sleep. It really messes you up. I have made it a huge priority and habit! Thanks for this video 💯💯💯💯

[grassgeese]

I really love how gently you offer your advice. So much free advice regarding BPD, and other personality disorders, online is so .. hateful... so clinical... you feel like a human, who genuinely seeks to give people advice for how to be more in control of their lives. Thank you for being a human, not another clinician.
I've been in medical facilities and institutions for my issues before and while I was certainly a wild child, I did not need the clinician treatment... I needed guidance and well it's late but I'm glad to have found some guidance :) thank u again, I've watched a few of your videos now

[cherrycreeper]

Sometimes I forget why the surface stuff happens I just do it and I feel disappointed in myself. But remembering that there's a reason, that it relates to the core content helps me work through it. Great video as usual ✨

[murrayshomeforwaywardchick]

Lol, "Make sleep a priority"...as I watch this at 2am racked with insomnia, (again).

[andreal.tribble]

Dr. Fox you are helping me SO MUCH! I can't thank you enough for these videos. I'm ordering your work book. You understand this personality disorder like nobody else I have ever heard. I'm crying writing this. I have said for years that HOPE is a luxury I can't afford. But because of things you are teaching me about myself, I now HAVE HOPE.