When your PARTNER PRIORITISES their CHILD over YOU, the step-parent.

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Your partner is in a pivotal position, balancing between their child and you heir partner. However there are different ways to behave according to whether your partner accepts you into a co-parenting role or not.

I help step-parent make their step-families the be the best it can, by helping them with understanding, strategies ways of thinking and tips

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Booklets

Step-children's difficult behaviour
£4.50GBP
How to understand why step-children behave the way they do, often in challenging ways. Strategies for dealing with the difficult behaviour to bring good results and long-lasting friendships and relationships.

Let's talk, Meeting as a step-family.
How to communicate as a step-family and run a meeting successfully. This helps set boundaries/rules, helps make changes and builds family togetherness.
£4.50 GBP

First steps the challenge of relationhips with step-children
Understanding what steps to take in building a step-child/ step-parent relationship.
£4.50 GBP

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The step parent is the third wheel. You will be the last one to be considered. The child and the other parent are priority. it’s awful.. 😭😭😭

EekZombies
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Never ever be a step parent. It’s a waste of your time, resources and your mental wellbeing. I know all to well. Never again

jasonbarber
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This is very difficult to navigate. It is better to stay married to the spouse you have children with. It seems easier to divorce but when you have to blend families together it actually becomes much harder than staying in the original marriage. Life is complicated no matter what decisions you make.

kimberlyl
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Marry someone with children at your own risk. Doing so seems to bring out the worst in people. From what I've seen, it seems reasonable that in most instances the child takes priority over the step-parent. Don't like it? Don't marry someone who is already a parent.

andrewbrendan
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Asking the stepparent to lead an independent life and to step aside sounds like a recipe for disaster for a healthy marriage. How/why/in what universe is the wife being independent and having a separate life from the husband ever a productive strategy to promote a healthy and close marriage. This sounds like last-resort advice that would create resentment in the stepparent.

christinedillingham
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Responsibility without authority is slavery period.
I won't be made to feel responsible having to put out my resources and time just to be disrespected. If I get disregarded then I withhold my attention and my finances I'm not being hateful in anyway I'm only stepping back so that real daddy can do his job (he doesn't never has not a Penny) my wife doesn't like it but I've told her I ain't no atm nor will I be disrespected they can just get to moving on down the road if that leaves a bad taste in there mouth.
I'm at a point of giving zero f_cks now

Irishman
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I’m almost to the point of no return, been with my lady for three years since her son was only 2 months old. Baby father never did shit for his son and very unstable financial in his own life. I’ve taken care of them, built a bond with her son and even claim him as mine.. love him and always thinking of ways to be there for him. His mother told me to my face a week ago her child will always come first no matter the situation & it crushed me.. I’ve poured all my emotions, money, time, effort.. it got so bad that I said why can’t we both be equal because I understand the need for a mother to protect her cubs… can we both prioritize each other & him equally? She looked at me like I was crazy and said I’m in competition with her son, I’m grown & shouldn’t need attention & I sound jealous……. Like something is wrong with me smh….. my soul is crushed beyond words because for 3 years I’ve made them my top priority….. but I guess that’s what I get for trying to fix a broken home with love…. I get heartbroken.

chaundadon
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I was pushed out of the home in the middle of the night and barricaded not to come back in. It was a 2.5 year relationship and slavery to cook and clean for his kids just to get kicked out in the middle of h to e night by his kids over one argument with their dad who brought the bedroom argument to living room

pushc
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My partner treats has 21 year old daughter like a wife. At 21 your not a child.

nhendrickson
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Can you please make a video on when older step children are mean/ passive aggressive to younger step children. Who are not biological siblings. Thank you so much. I look forward to your videos and they have helped me!

melissaann
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When I withdrew from the stepchild, my partner hated it and insisted I connect more with the child even though he constantly prioritised his stepchild. Mind you, there were two other children in the house. My own child, and one we shared together. They were also not prioritised. It was such a mess.

tdibetso
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Thank you, these are the best videos I have heard on this subject! x

zoebrock
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My spouses' children are in their 30s and are still acting they did 10 years ago. I need to walk away from this drama.

lpaone
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PARENTS SHOULD NEVER PRIORITISE THEIR CHILDREN FROM ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP IF THEY WANT A NEW RELATIONSHIP, THEREBY MESSING THE NEW PARTNER'S LIFE AROUND. THEY SHOULD REMAIN SINGLE! THE CHILD IS NOT ABOVE THE RELATIOBSHIP. NO ONE DESERVES A CRAP LIFE WHERE THE BRAT IS CONSIDERED "IMPORTANT". ABSOLUTE RUBBISH!!!

stephanieval
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People in comments seem to think prioritising your children means indulging their every whim, how bizarre! Of course dependents need to be prioritised over an adult who can take care of themself! It's literally your legal responsibility as a parent. Which relationship would you be most likely to end? It's always going to be the adult one, your children and your children forever! They can't go and find new parents but your partner can leave and find a new partner of they're not happy.

papiliopurpuro
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I tried for 2 yesrs but spoilt step daughter tried to play us against each other and trying to say im making her jealous if i played with her brother - i have now in 3rd year together seperated myself from being around when he sees his kids & do my own thing. As like you said i was being disrespected because he didn't discipline the girl & didn’t want to upset her over me!! She would totally ignore me and not even say hello to me in my house & made funny faces at me - she has a very jealous streak & hascto be centre of attention all the time. Horrible negative energy no matter how nice you was to her....
I got fed up spending my days off listening to her whinging & whining over almost everything 🙄 so now im not around when he sees his kids!!! THE GAMES END WHEN YOU STOP PLAYING & REMOVE YOURSELF FROM THE SITUATION 💯

Especially if your partner doesn’t discipline or allow the bad behaviour to carry on 🙃

Ladybirdtaj
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(FACTS OVA FEELINGS). Children Ollwaves Set Us Up Unintentionally to make us feel the Exact Same way tha wee have been making them feel that they r a mirror focus on what eu can do differently to change the way that eu now knoe that eu r making them feel instead of asking the Reflection in the mirror to change

GoddestPitcher
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My partner bought a small farm3 years ago, but has encouraged all her sibling to move in..none of them have any money so what ever we produce on the farm from my hard work goes straight into there houses and she always defends them to the hilt, I'm devastated but left a week ago after 4 years of putting up with this sort of behaviour...

MegaPatients
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Please do a video on when your partner prioritizes their child's biological parent over you?

Lemons
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Hi. I am at my wits end. I have been with my partner for 5 years. He has 3 sons and I have 1. All are grown up now. His youngest works abroad 8 months and then comes home for 4 months. He insists that his son must stay with us for those 4 months. This does not sit well with me. Not only do I cover 80% of our expenses but I also do all the cooking and cleaning and I have a full time job. I feel this is intrusive as our daily habits are changed and I never know when he will be here for meals or sleeping over. He comes and goes as he pleases. I feel like a boarding house. My partner does not want to discuss the situation and I am already stressed even though his son won't be back for 6 months. What can I do??

elizmamarais