Breakups: When do you give them a second chance?

For those of you who want a second exploration of a former love, these are the factors that MUST be in place for romantic success to occur. Only then, will you have the composure and distance to create a new dynamic for partnership.

The Dating Games Guide: You know you're being played, but what's the game?
And what's your countermove?

The Older Women | Younger Men Dating Guide:
Dating a younger man and wondering if it will last?
Attracted to an older woman and not sure how to make your move?

Rough breakup?
Check out: Breakup Triage; The Cure for Heartache

Wondering how to benefit from life's challenges?
Allowing Magnificence; Living the Expanded Version of Your Life

[LRF]

If someone leaves you without talking to you about problems in the relationship and don't give you a chance to work on it. Don't take them back. Your ex quit on you. That person will quit on you again.

[bystandersarah]

For me, regaining romantic innocence with someone is not possible if they’ve betrayed me. I will never feel safe around them again.

[Veagence]

I don't understand why schools dont teach this valuable information that helps us prosper. Thank your for sharing you expertise on this issue for us, I hope you achieve the best things in life!

[emilye.]

This is exactly my situation. We have both changed. I am in a much better place. He says he wants to show me he's changed. Im not throwing myself at him, just taking it day by day, very slowly. Thank you for this, it gives me another side and a clearer picture.

[tetehl]

I wish I've watched this few months ago. It would have save me so much heartache . He hasn't/didn't changed and I had a gut feeling it wouldn't work the second time around but I still gave him a second chance. I'm moving on now. I love your videos. Thanks for sharing your knowledge. 😊

[hannahstanden]

This is brilliant thank you. A lot of relationship advice out there teaches a black and white, ridgid formula, but life is more complicated. You hit the nail on head here, I needed to hear this X

[richardgonzalez]

Let me sum this up before anybody goes back to an ex if you have done work on yourself gone to therapy red discovered yourself whatever self development and your ex has not do not go back trust me I made that mistake and I literally wasted 3 months of my life and there was a struggle the whole 3 months if the other person has stayed the same they will look at you as the problem even though you have more Tools in your belt they will never see that especially if they left the relationship just keep this in mind if someone left you there's a reason why they left you they looked at you as the problem so if you go back to this person and they have not done work they will always look at you as the piece that don't fit even though it really is them

[LSF]

Beautifully explained. The human instinct, the turn which you mentioned I felt that recently when my ex came back to me. I just couldn't feel the love, even though I was waiting for her to come back. It made me wonder if something was wrong with me, because my response wasn't fitting the bill.

[MA-]

I like that concept that I need to see a "deeper and better version of the both ways actually.

[lexislibrary]

Thank you I broke up with my boyfriend and it's very fresh but I'm still going through my emotions. But I just need to take time for myself and if he wants me back and if I want him back, he has to show me hes changed.

[davidfelso]

I don't understand how you can exactly pinpoint what i'm thinking and feeling, but this reassurance and advice is coming to me at such a good time. I think I'll give them a second chance, just because It's my first serious relationship, but it will never be the same as before. Also I like to experiment with certain radical situations, such as being in a toxic relationship, just so I can learn what to avoid. It might have a bad ending but i'm really hoping that they will somehow change their behavior, because in retrospect they were just using me for their own happiness and not for ours. I might regret this...

[hushpuppies]

Susan, i really wish i could talk to you. You are so amazing and absolutely right every time. Its like i have a friend i can count on. In my opinion when you offered your naive innocent humble self they played with your feelings and now you cannot associate with them with the same verve. If you trust again they will hit you hard again. This has happened to me. And you need to start your recovery all over again from scratch and this time feeling even more stupid. Please people save yourself. Its hard as hell to let go. It's even harder second time. If you give time atleast you will heal.

[francesca]

Honestly this is the best advice I think I’ve found after listening to a lot. I worried that the hesitancy would be it and thus all was ruined, but seeing that hesitancy as more of a positive, a safety mechanism that I should have had the first time around, is an interesting way of thinking about it

[CanadianAndre]

This is my favorite video. You give powerful, concise guidance that speaks experience. Your perspective on what to stay aware of, in them and in one’s self is very refreshing and sound advice. Thank you for these videos Susan. I saw, I subscribed, and I’m thumbs upping too. 😊

[anthonymacon]

thiers so much i learned about myself in my breakup when she left me . Thiers alot ive learned and try to keep them to stsy consistant in the change . The only thing i hope is my ex would take me back so i can prove to her ive changed with my actions and not words. A silent reminder for me from keeping me not to slide is REMEMBER HOW IT FELT WITHOUT HER SO DONT SLIP AGAIN . we fought alot but both remained faithful for 1 year . If u ever got a second chance it would be the happyist day of my life

[cosmopolitanbay]

Just gave it a second look. This is very wise and insightful! As tempting as it may be to rectify the past "Enter at your own risk!" LOL Still, you may quickly realise you're no longer that much into that person. Am having doubts about them changing though. They may or may not have changed as much. But, if there is a different, a new YOU, people will respond differently.

[whatrtheodds]

It's been three weeks for me since we were last together and his reaching out here and there even though I specifically said I don't want a friendship after he broke my 🥀♥️ heart. I feel the pain so badly although it's eased a little in the last couple of days, I feel far too much😥 to approach clearly, my friend says I should take his offer to reconnect, but im such a wreck right now my communication would come off too clingy and desperate. I want to be valued and that means being in my power. I think your totally right about waiting, we both need to do some work. It's hard I really really want love and a family, but I need to accept the process. Who knows in three months only time will tell. I guess I gotta accept that as a reasonable time frame, and give myself love in the meantime❤️

[jimstevens]

Susan .I have watched every video of yours that I have found over a few months. This one is truly a message that will help many. It is 100 % perfect advice.

[anveshashandilya]

Thank you for this. It gave me a little hope that the power lies within me. You're an angel

[silvanaarellano]

Wow, this was a ton a actual advice. Not the same cookie cutter common sense stuff I’ve been reading and hearing from everyone else. Subscribed!