Stay in - or Leave - a Relationship?

Produced in collaboration with Andrew Foerster & Joren Cull
Illustration by Joren Cull

[Reebs]

Aw man. Who would want to leave a partner so fly

[sumguy]

Leaving an unfulfilling relationship hurts but staying in it destroys your life so make the step

[metgala]

if you are watching this you are going through some pain💔

[manuel]

I find a small amount of confort in knowing that I will regret any decision I make, in these kinds of situations.

[zmoodyz]

Kill the fantasy in your head that somebody is going to complete you or mKe you happy. Become the type of person you're looking for and then you'll never be alone even when you're alone. Establish a good reputation with yourself by always being honest and finishing the things you start, and simply, get excited about yourself. Start exercising, get some new clothes that fit perfect and look awesome, get tan, double down on your hygiene and most importantly, stop looking for somebody if you aren't happy in a room by yourself or spending nights alone. Being single is a great thing if you're willing to put in the effort it takes to be satisfied with yourself

[mrcherrytits]

I'm so on the fence with my relationship right now. It's hard to leave someone when you feel like you'd be ripping their heart out by doing so. :(

[daqlosers]

I left my bf because I realized that while he was committed- he & I wanted different things out of life and were simply not compatible long term. We were willing to work through any small issues but the small issues were just a cover for the large glaring incompatibilities that we had ignored when we began dating. It was a hard lesson to learn that there’s “normal” relationship strife & there’s “We can’t meet each other’s needs without sacrificing who we are” strife and you can only do so much before you make each other miserable.

[anticsw]

Someone on this channel is going through some shit.

[Tybaltish]

Do whatever; but please stop having children in hopes it'll 'give your life and relationship more purpose/happiness'....your own happiness is your own responsibility, nobody else's....and the other parent is in your life forever.(which is guaranteed certain 'unhappiness' in most cases)

[gamefly]

This video has probably ended some relationships 😅

[Alexis_]

What kills relationship is the expectations we put on the other person to make us happy. But we hardly ever think of their happiness.

[Mrs]

The moment he said “Leave” at the end, my stomach dropped to the floor. How dumb am I? My life is so much better, happier because of my partner. This made it so clear. I need to work on myself, on being a better partner in order to improve my relationship. Thanks.

[RBDETT_]

'children would rather be in a broken family, than an unhappy one'
this one hits home. I'm no longer a child anymore but I'm sick of my parents fighting for just about my entire existence. I don't know how to tell em I want them to just end it and be in peace. anyway great video and insight.

[karenmonson]

The saying " Listen to your gut feeling" is very true. If something feels off and you keep getting that same feeling repeatedly don't ignore it. Better to leave and if you can do it amicably. If it's abusive just leave as safely as you are able. Nobody wins "living a lie"!

[pansyd]

The breakup checklist, summarised:
1) How much of our unhappiness can be tightly attributed to this particular partner? Might similar feelings result from any attempt to live in such close proximity to someone?
2) In what ways might we ourselves be a bit hard to live with?
3) What do we manage not to fight about? Consider previous partners
4) Get to know your crushes better
5) Think about how many intelligent and sexually available people our single friends actually tend to come into contact with day-to-day
6) Have an honest conversation with your partner about your sadness
7) Think about how you would feel as a child of this pairing as it currently is vs under parental separation
8) Remind yourself that it might be rather normal not to have great sex after a long time together
9) Consider whether you’re ready to trade this familiar feeling unhappiness for a new and hopeful but more complex and lonely variety

If you still have the impulse to leave the relationship, leave.

[Sragamna]

He walks out the door, the light flips on in the baby's room, and my heart breaks.

[CowLaser]

IF I GO THERE WILL BE TROUBLE
IF I STAY IT WILL BE DOUBLE

[carrots]

Our concept of hope tends to be stronger than our memories of good experience, so we're more likely to move on than to stay. But the problem is that we often don't see how good things are until we no longer have them. What a dilemma.

[shade]

The hardest part is realizing that love is not enough. If something isn’t working, it doesn’t matter how much you love one another..

[rogerray]

but with all seriousness if you base your relationship on your feelings, you'd really mess it up. Love is not just about feelings. It is that commitment to show affection to your partner regardless of how you feel. That's what makes relationships last.