Example of Effects of Narcissistic Parents #shorts

[ceilconstante]

Not everyone who had Narscissist parents and siblings too. I feel I was groomed from Childhood to be treated that way. It seemed normal so I put up with Narscistic abuse till it got really bad and didn't understand why.
Sensitive caring people tend to attract Narscissist. Now that I understand what was going on, I just appreciate peace and quiet.

[ALT-vzjn]

There’s also the person who constantly forms romantic relationships with narcissists, because they’re repeating the pattern they were groomed to accept in childhood. I wish you had talked about that aspect, although I realize Shorts don’t offer a whole lot of time for all the different effects of growing up with one or more narcissistic parents.

Both my brother and I married narcissists and I always ended up in relationships with narcissists, after I divorced my malignant narc I stopped dating for years in order to work on figuring out why this pattern was repeating itself. It took me forever and a lot of therapy to realize and accept that my mother was a narc; she had groomed me so badly into thinking everything was ‘my’ fault.

Fortunately I eventually met and married a wonderful normal loving man. My brother is still stuck with his narcissist wife. I cut contact with my narc parent in 2018 (the other one is dead).

[Tyndalic]

I am a survivor of mother dearest. I shake my head at this, because I’m not the same

[spectranaut]

I cant even get a relationship, people can just sense my extreme insecurity.

[Autistic_Pelican_Fucker]

Both of my parents are extremely narcissistic in different ways and I don't wanna be ANYTHING like them. My dad's a verbally abusive racist pos who's ALWAYS right no matter what and my mom likes to act like she's the best person in the world with the perfect marriage and good relationship with me and her niece they had to adopt. It's beyond fucking disgusting how she acts in public and I've of course called her out on her lying bullshit in front of her friends. She likes lie about me sometimes in front of me to her friends and I call her tf out cuz I'm absolutely sick of it. It's also extremely awesome that I can't even have my own opinions on anything without being told I'm wrong. They want me to be their clone and that absolutely will never happen.

[SentMyOwnWay]

Yeah, relationships never last with me. Can’t tell you how many times I messed things up with jealousy and controlling behavior. Now that I’m older and dating is more difficult, I just feel like a walking red flag to potential mates.

[lorrainedevlin]

Some attract abusive relationships, and are soft hearted. Insecurity can come from abusive relationships and confidence can be gained by therapy.

[Mimi_]

My Mom is a narcissist and my Dad was physically abusive because of my Mom complaining about me. I became a people pleaser

[LL-xlhq]

Self reflection is truly one of the major keys to overcoming conditioning. This is how we learn to find healthier coping mechanisms that actually work and be able to build trust and create healthy mindsets and expectations of others and ourselves. Also we learn what our feelings are telling us about setting boundaries if we just pay attention to our selves.

[desertrose]

My 21 yr old daughter has been seeing a psychiatrist s ince 2nd grade, beginning with ADHD.
She's endured 3 sexual assaults causing depression & PTSD.
About a month ago, she was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. 🥺
As a mom, I was devastated. But, the new diagnosis fits the missing puzzle pieces.
I want to tell you that I, as her mom, can attest to my daughter having fear of abandonment issues since she was born.
After I delivered her, a nurse from the ward came to ask us if we had a baby swing already set up at home because the only way the nurses had been able to soothe her (in the packed nursery) was to place her in a swing on HIGH.
I held my daughter her entire 1st year of life! I couldn't put her down! She would NOT sleep in a crib! Even grandmother's & aunts tried ... & gave up. She HAD to be touching me.
She never took long naps as a baby. The only way to get her to take a nap was either in her swing on high, or I laid down with her to nurse her to sleep while we co-slept.
She's ALWAYS hated school. So I'm proud to say she's half way to her IT bachelor's degree. Online, because she can't tolerate a classroom environment.
She had to be home schooled during high school because she began having conversion disorder drop seizures & it was becoming dangerous.
She lies. About everything. Big lies, unnecessary little lies. But she's so good at it, I couldn't punish her when she was younger because I had no proof.
My daughter has NEVER received corporal punishment (spanking, slaps) from anyone! I was beaten as a child and even the idea of laying my hands on my child in anger makes me physically ill.
I knew there had to be more than ADHD going on with my daughter. It didn't explain "the rest of the story".
Knowing this new diagnosis of BPD, I'm trying to learn how to speak to her again. More softly than ever before now that I know she perceives others' excited or angry voice levels more intensely than a neuro typical person.
Parents of children with autism learn how to raise their child 1 step at a time with tons of resources & support groups.
Where do we turn?
How do her father & I help her now?
I'm doing research now! But we're behind the 8-ball!
Are we enabling her by paying for everything?
She insists on living out in town, but can't pay for it.
I'm rationalizing the expenses by telling myself to do whatever it takes to get her to finish college!
She's going to apply for SS disability, but that takes a long time. Maybe years. She needs that college degree to fall back on.
We had her late in life. I turned 39 a month after her birth.
We won't be here forever. Her father & I have major health issues of our own, unfortunately.
How do we help set her up to hold her own in this world when we're gone?
I'll tell you ... I'm grieving the loss of the daughter I thought I had. I had hope that she would grow out of this rebellious stage. But it's not a phase. It's a terrifying illness. And only if she puts the work in will she achieve remission. Coping skills.
Our lives are forever changed.
But! This momma bear is going to do what I always do. Get her the tools & help she needs. Even if I have to crawl to get it.
Positive input is welcome!
Please, no flames. This is hard enough. ❤

[nivision]

I feel really lucky that my most narcissistic parent lost all custody beyond weekend visits of me between the ages of 2 and 16. I was still affected by the narcissistic abuse, but I had less to "deprogram" out of my brain than somebody who spent the entire time there. Want to say those with narcissistic parents in the comments, you're not necessarily doomed to be narcissistic too, seek therapy. If you have the will towards self-improvement, and the ability to recognize and admit that you are not perfect, you are already leaps and bounds better off when it comes to any kind of recovery than the people who harmed you!

[rejaneoliveira]

It’s truly sad how narcissistic parents can negatively influence every aspect of one’s existence, even after decades.

Thank you for your insight, Dr. Grande.❤

[bthomson]

Certainly often a vicious cycle! Those who break out are to be commended. 🏆

[oregonsnob]

I’m a survivor of a sadistic Mother Dearest who believed my body and life were hers to do with however she pleased. As a middle aged woman I have never been able to pull off a long term relationship due to the damage. She is the ugliest person I have ever seen. Mind boggling that I came from such evil. Maybe in my next life I can experience companionship and love. Fingers crossed.

[NopeNotTodaySatan]

I went the other way. Ended up marrying a sociopath at 22. Worst decade of my life. Still recovering years later.

[hexhex]

no empathy for narcissists no matter how they got that way

[metsrus]

self hate and narcissism are like virus, contagious as hell and always get passed on to the next victim.

[lorrainedevlin]

Therapy teaches us a lot and I am not insecure, or jealous like my narc parent.

[chipchippie]

After trying to hold my entire family accountable for over 50 years I decided to block them all off and finally I couldn't be happier. Now with all that emotional manipulation gone I might be able to form a healthy relationship.

[debbiethompson]

Both of my parents were narcissist maybe even sociopaths.but they barely spoke to me so I guess I was lucky?