10 Subtle Signs of Narcissism Exposure

Narcissism:

There are two types of narcissism: With grandiose narcissism we see characteristics like being extroverted, socially bold, self-confident, having a superficial charm, being resistant to criticism, and being callous and unemotional. Vulnerable narcissism is characterized by shame, anger, aggression, hypersensitivity, a tendency to be introverted, defensive, avoidant, anxious, depressed, socially awkward, and shy.

Narcissistic personality disorder is a Cluster B personality disorder in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual. It has nine symptom criteria, five of which are required for a diagnosis.

1: Grandiose sense of self-importance
2: Fantasies
3: Special or unique
4: Requires excessive admiration
5: Sense of entitlement
6: Manipulative
7: Lacks empathy for others
8: Often envious
9: Arrogant attitudes or behaviors

American Psychiatric Association. (2013). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (5th ed.). Arlington, VA: Author.

[EyeToTheSkyPerth]

Feeling like you are always walking on eggshells around them -exhausting to say the least.

[sugarcayenneseven]

"..the narcissist... expends very little energy to cause damage. but you expend a great deal to prevent damage.." i likely the BEST, most accurate, succinctly stated description of that dynamic.
thank you Dr.Grande.

[HandbrakeBiscuit]

I have been exposed to a lifetime of narcissistic abuse by a parent and an elder sibling and I approve this message.
I dearly hope that many people will see this *before* being harmed (or harmed further) by narcissists.
Thankyou Dr Grande.

[Chimponaut]

I find that a lot of people that's never been around a narcissist have a hard time grasping how someone like that behaves. It's almost like you have to see it to believe it

[QuiDocetDiscit]

"You feel better or relief when they're not around"....My wife went away overseas for 3 months to house sit for a friend. It was the happiest and most peaceful I had felt in 38 yrs of marriage.

[youssefmebarki]

These are the signs that the individuals exposed to a narcissist will detectect in themselves.
3:45: nervousness and perfectionism
5:00: reluctance to say anything that indicates weakness
5:40: distorded view of relationships... the new standard is that relationships cause suffering
6:18: feeling as yours goals are too small
6:50: feeling as your goals don’t matter... you have no right to be happy
7:15: feelings as though you are completely at fault... inappropriate guilt caused by manipulation or gaslighting
7:41: elevated level of distrust... reasonable when dealing with a narcissist
8:13: continual fatigue... you are on the defensive side
8:37: suspicious of others... narcissist recruits agents
9:00: no expectation of hearing the truth or hold the narcissist accountable

[mephistopheles]

5:20 This reminds me of my Dad. I remember one summer I came home from jury duty and told my Dad that I had jury duty with Laura Bush. As I was blabbering away about how interesting it was in our long car ride back home he ignored me. Once we got home he was in a bad mood and started yelling at everybody over small things. My sister asked me what I did because he was fine when he left to come and get me and I told her I didn't do anything.


In hindsight, that is a consistent pattern I noticed throughout my life. Every accomplishment I ever had was met with either dismissal, anger, or both. I couldn't even graduate college without my dad getting mad. I graduated with honors and made the Dean's list, but my dad was more concerned with being mad at small things that had nothing to do with graduation and then complaining and yelling once we got home from the ceremony.


Narcissists really are toxic people.

[rubyreduxx]

YOO THE TIREDNESSS
The suspicion of others because of the flying monkeys oh LAWD. It feels so great to be away from it all

[conniethingstad]

sanity looks insane in an insane world. saying my daughter told me that I often use to remind myself. Great video. On point.

[lookitsdebby]

Love how you took the statement of narcissists flashing red seriously and answered accordingly

[cindyrhodes]

I also appreciate your giving the sign of feeling nervous all the time, knowing that nothing i did would ever be good enough. My top grades were never good enough. My looks were never good enough. My existence was never good enough. He even told me that I was the ugliest baby he had ever seen, and I was his baby. I am no longer under the influence of that person, but does still hurt a little when I write it out like this. Thank you for all you do!

[malin]

The best protection you have against toxic people are clear boundaries.

[narchelsin]

Unfortunately, if you've made it this far into a narcissistic relationship, that you're actually seeing these signs, you're already way too far in...

[picklep]

Feeling like I didn’t get to express myself properly, it’s always in hindsight
Detour in my plans and realizing it too late

[jcrnda]

One other thing - the reason you feel exhausted after being with a narcissist must be the constant stress/alert (cortisol level). It also may lead to a number of medical conditions.
I wonder if this has been assessed in any studies.

[healyourselffirst]

Lol your deadpan humour is refreshing 🙃

My experience: They move in fast and don’t give you an opportunity to say no, to negotiate arrangements, to have a day to yourself to determine what is happening. It sweeps you off your feet then drop you once you’ve forgotten who you are.

[mandyl]

The subtle signs are spot on. Its interesting to look at the practical ways in which you 'feel' the Narc. The most obvious for me, is the "everything you say will be used in evidence against you". I lived that for years. I once tested it, by telling him I thought I was drinking too much. It was a throw away remark, not a fill blown conversation. Within hours, literally, he was telling me I made no sense at all as I was blatantly drunk. I wasn't drunk, I was testing a theory. 🤢

[Jess-knvl]

Over explaining from narcissistic abuse, a trauma response.

[kaym.]

You are spot on with these points! They never take responsibility for their actions. As a matter of fact they are masters at arguing and switching around the entire conversation so that you alone stand "guilty" Their competitive style of conflict resolution is pretty exhausting.

[kitssch]

I went from.. being abused by a narcissist growing up, to becoming covert myself to dating malignant narcissists.. now I just educate myself and focus on self love..