Signs You Have Avoidant Attachment Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Self Help

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#signs #avoidantattachment #selfhelp #cognitivebehavioraltherapy #counseling #counselling

Video by Dr. Dawn Elise Snipes on integrative behavioral health approaches including counseling techniques and skills for improving mental health and reducing mental illness.

[DocSnipes]

👍Online Courses for Continuing Education (CEU, OPD, CPD) and Substance Abuse Counselor Certification

[lauraf.e]

"Given up on other people." Oh God, 100 times, yes. All my relationships and friendships have happened because the other person kept pushing and didn't give up on ME. It's terrible.

[avoiceinthewilderness]

My mother yelled and screamed at me when taking a minute to "help me" learn to ride a bike. She got mad and went in the house so I taught myself by using a tree to lean the bike against and push off the tree until I got the this day she says it is her proudest parent moment and praised me for choice was to be yelled and screamed at or teach myself, no brainer....but how sad.

[lauraf.e]

I've been a dismissive avoidant for most of my life. Managed to largely heal in recent years through self therapy. I believe this all started with my covert narcissist father and emotional neglect. I didn't feel seen and basically gave up trying. I'm also INFJ and felt shamed throughout my teen years for my personality. I'm horrified that I've spent so much of my life as a DA 😢

[phantompowerpublications]

My theroy is Sharing your feelings doesn't make you weak. Vulnerable, maybe, to someone who may have unhealthy relationship's in the past.

[MaryMary-snhh]

@ 12:39 “They need to feel like they’re empowered, so they need to be the one to set the pace of things”
You kindly & coherently explained this in a way that gave me relief. I’ve always felt guilty for always wanting to be in charge & taking control, that way, nothing catches me by surprise… in relationships of course. Thank you 😮😮😮

[JJ-rpdf]

Appreciate the concise yet very effective summary of Signs, Causes and Interventions. Feeling unsafe, ignored and unworthy of love hence dismissive, minimising and superficial in relationships is so true and key to trusting.

[walterhernandez]

Non-native English speaker here. I was shocked for a minute, when Dr. Dawn-Elise Snipes said: "That tends to be a disaster." talking about relationships between anxious and avoidant style people. I have an anxious attachment style, and I knew things between my ex-gf and me were never going to work . Her avoidant attachment style triggered feelings of anxiety, insecurity, jealousy, etc. in me. I lived in hell during those four months. I had to break up with her, swallow the bitter pill of going back to being alone/lonely even though I loved her so much, and I still do, but felt that was the right thing to do. It's been a month since then, and although I've made little progress in terms of moving on, the pain is still unbearable .

[avoiceinthewilderness]

I have avoidant attachment. This makes sense. Narcissistic parent did not allow us to have needs or show emotion. I have ADHD and only got diagnosed at 38 or so.

[ericav]

Doc, I want to say thank you because your videos literally changed my life. Last year, I just stumbled upon one of your videos about C-PTSD. Before that, I had NEVER even heard of such a thing. I didn't have any clue why the last 37 years of my life had been so difficult, and why no amount of SSRIs or talk therapy ever worked for me. You gave me the vocabulary to put into words what I have been living all of my life. I was able to get the correct diagnoses and meds that I need. I was able to start DBT and EMDR in February of this year. So your videos are not just informative for the sake of getting CEUs, they're invaluable for those who are struggling but don't have the last few pieces of the puzzle to explain what's going on with them. Again, thank you so much and God bless!

[ALUNE_]

Your channel is so under rated. I love the way you explain things

[zamzamahmed]

No one can beat doc Snipes in explaining these psychological approaches! Thank you!

[agnieszkaweronikajakubowsk]

Thank you for helping me and my partner to find out bout our attachment styles and how to work with those. We become more aware and understanding and also loving because of knowing that we didn’t have best parenting care. That makes me love him even more and we both try to heal each other wounds.

[althompson]

Best video on avoidant attachment I’ve ever seen…I’ve seen many. Thank you for your work

[faysmith]

I found this video interesting because I was diagnosed with AAD about 10 years ago (I am 75) All my adult life I have blamed myself for 3 failed marriage and emotional distance from the rest of my family (1 sister and 2 cousins). From the age of 4 I traveled all over the world until getting married at age 22. I tended (at least at first) to make 1 or 2 very close friends. My sister, 5 years younger always had a ton of friends from the first day of school. Usually, when we left somewhere we had very little warning. I think my parents didn't tell us we were leaving because they though it would be easier on us. The worst one was when I was 12 and lived in Normandy. I was very intensely involved in horseback riding/jumping. We went to the stable on Thursday and on Friday my parents told me we were going back to the US on Sunday by ship. My mother took me to the stable on Saturday to say goodbye to the 67 horses and my instructor, Odette. It broke my heart but it also taught me a lesson. Don't get attached and you won't get hurt. I have spent most of my adult life blaming myself for the failures of my marriages, etc. When I got this diagnosis a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders! It wasn't my fault, it was just the way I am. Since then I am much much happier. I know I cannot sustained a relationship and that is fine. I found this interesting though because other than maybe a little 'neglect' because I was so solitary, I had a wonderful childhood (other than all the broken hearts). Thanks.

[axixi]

This is the best video I have seen so far about avoidant attachment. Much thanks to you for sharing such valuable information

[jhlfsc]

I have no doubt that my attachment style is Dismissive Avoidant for sure. The one major thing that never makes sense to me is that I truly do not ever remember feeling unloved or uncared for by my parents. I'm not saying they were perfect, but if there was any emotional neglect going on, to this day I was at least mercifully unaware of it.
I wonder how much of this (at least in the case of a DA) is simply the temperament you're born with which could have made it difficult for a parent to connect even if they really tried to.
I also wonder if parents (perhaps like mine) could've been neglectful but in a loving way if that makes sense? In other words....I wonder if they could've actively downplayed our distress, constantly redirected, and encouraged self reliance not out of neglect, but out of misguided concern to help soothe us and make us feel empowered in hopes of lowering our anxiety levels and ironically raising our confidence??

[hoorano]

Thank you, Doc Snipes, for this explanation of the Avoidant Attachment style. I wished I knew this info a long time ago.

[glorydeyglowlight]

Greetings! Thanks for posting this video! It is of immense help to me...personally I have faced certain dysfunctional family relationships and also disappointment in love and friendships. I am now very reluctant to associate with people intimately! These tips will help me in healing and living life with more positive and trusting discernment! God Bless All! 🥰🙏

[bernicerodriguez]

Omg this me. Avoidant is what I use to protect myself. At least I know now that I’m not crazy. Time to work hard to improve this. Thank you for this video.