When The Avoidant Wants To Be 'Friends'

When The Avoidant Wants To Be Friends
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[Mypineappleprincess]

As a former DA I can confirm. If you want them back, don't do friendship with avoidants. I was doing this unconsciously and breadcrumbed my exes. And I knew I can get them back anytime.

[morpheus]

My DA ex did exactly this very thing, broke up with me out of the blue but offered me friendship. I told her no way, I am not playing second fiddle to anyone and I’m not hanging around to be your backup. We cannot be friends. It made her mad. She can live with her decision forever. It eventually becomes a mindshift when you realize that the one that broke up with you is not more valuable than you and doesn’t deserve your attention after their betrayal. They should become persona non grata to you. Stay strong everyone!

[helenpauline]

Friendship can't work unless they become emotionally mature. They have no business being in relationships or friendships if they're going to keep avoiding accountability. Pain needs addressing not avoiding so best to avoid the avoiders.

[nikki]

They still discard you even when you’re friends. It’s best to leave them alone for them to heal.

[RaphaelFrancis]

This is what she wanted, to put me in the friend zone. I said no way, because she would have held me hostage while I see her talking to other men. It’s bad enough that I’ve suffered over 7 months of anxiety after she dropped me.

[Nazareyes-zuul]

Do you truly want a relationship with someone who doesn’t want it back? No, you don’t. If it does work, let it go. You will have peace.

[Villanelle]

I really needed this. Thank you guys so so much! Appreciate you!

[MarcoCameron-fc]

Looking back at how my breakup happened, I'm now relieved that I wasn't offered friendship by my avoidant ex because I most likely would have accepted it even if it meant feelling exactly how Coach Craig said. But now as months have passed since she broke up with me and vanished, I am starting to realize why would I want to be friends with someone who has hurt me multiple times and then just treat me like I don't exist after being a consistent partner and always showing up for her? Doesn't seem like the person I want to be in a relationship with again let alone even be friends with.

[chiarazoccarato]

My DA (or FA) asked to return to being friends like before when he was breaking up with me. I told him no, it was too soon. He texted me two times. 2 months after the break up I said that I was ok with it. HE said he needed to think about it. 10 days later he told me he would feel stuck and that he could never be friends like before. I didn't respond to that message. I haven't talked to him for 3 months

[Britt-bx]

"Friendship" can EASILY turn into "situationship". Do not do it. It hurts not to have them in your life but you will inevitability be in a state of anxiety and pain.

[SpaceDiiva]

After my ex and I broke up we thought it would be a good idea to try to spend sometime together for our kiddo to see that we were still on good terms. But after the last lunch I had with her she told me she started dating her cousin which ended any comfort I had left to do these lunches. I recently got into a relationship with a mutual friend and she tried inviting us to another lunch after she found out, after I politely declined I noticed she unfriended both me and my current partner. Really made me feel like she was doing it just to play games and bread crumb me now. At the time I’m sure I made her feel like I was always going to be around with how I handled the break up but now I’ve spent a lot of time with your videos and the workbooks that I realized she was not good for me and I had to let her go. Don’t fall into the friendship role if you know what’s best for you. It’s not worth it

[Doohopper_Grandma]

I Loved this video . Everything you said was so Realistic.
My ex started his Oh we will always be friends speech right before he Totally Ghosted and discarded me. He did this knowing I wanted so SO MUCH more. Then after he discarded me for someone else who had in the past Ghosted and cheated on him, saw me a week after he Ghosted me and pretending like he didn’t even know me. So he was Lying about being my friend.

[hhcoach]

Just say no. Do not ever agree to something you’re no okay with. If you still romantic feelings for them and you want more, state you’re no okay with just being friends and get in touch if anything changes. Walk away. If they miss you, still have romantic feelings they will get in touch. Had one girl recently a girl I used to date try to friend zone me after she got out of a relationship. I told her straight up I’m just not interested in you in a platonic way. Within a couple weeks we scheduled a date for next week. Stand up for yourself, don’t be a jerk but state what you want.

[TyrantPlaysTV]

If you do friendship with the avoidant ex, she's going to treat you as a garbage... an option and ofcourse they can't feel how you feel when you get hurt seeing her with someone else 😊

[basicinfo]

3:15 be in alignment with yourself, not just authentic.

[Audrey-kh]

Why would i want to invest my time and energy on someone that doesnt desire intimate relationships?
My time is limited to people that are reciprocal

[Melissaw]

My ex partner wants friendship in the future once I focus on myself, I thought thats bs and I decided that I can't be his friend and I let him know this and went no contact after that as the break up was messy.

[gj]

Has anyone ever dealt with a widower ? They are worse than an avoidant. 😢
I do have empathy but I wish someone would of warned me .

[ninapaz]

By no means can I be friends with an EX at least for now.
That would be pretty weird . . . who knows maybe in 10 years 😅😂

[justinemail]

Can you guys do emotional cheating with a friend who ends up becoming the rebound, and if it's worth waiting for an ex after that?