How to Deal With Gaslighting in Relationships

In last week’s show, Seven Covert Types of Gaslighting, we highlighted seven strategies used by narcissists and other manipulators to confuse, manipulate and control their victims. In this week’s show, we are focusing on strategies for overcoming gaslighting in a relationship setting. In the book of Genesis, we read of the first recorded incidence of gaslighting in which the devil gaslighted Eve and Adam into doubting the command that God had given not to eat of the tree in the middle of the garden. Falling to this deception by the devil had severe consequences for Adam and Eve. Similarly, pervasive gaslighting in a relationship has severe consequences. Victims of gaslighting begin to doubt their recollection of events and even their own feelings because of their narcissistic partners’ influence. As a result, victims develop mental illnesses such as anxiety and depression, and some eventually suffer a nervous breakdown. The strategies in this podcast have been proven to protect individuals in narcissistic relationships from the devastating effects of gaslighting.

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In this weekly show, award-winning psychotherapist, Michael Hart, explore mental health and relationship issues from a Biblical perspective. Biblical stories come to life as we look at them through psychological lenses. For example, exploring adoption through the Biblical text in Exodus tells of Moses' adoption into Pharoah's family. Sibling Rivalry, Couples Communication, Controlling Sexual Desires, How to Choose the Right Spouse, are just a few of the over 240 topics covered on this channel.

[adeagbobabajide]

Gaslighting is a serious issue many people may not even realize they are experiencing in their relationships. It's frightening to think that manipulators can use these covert tactics to confuse and control their victims, causing them to doubt their own reality. The fact that the book of Genesis even touches on this topic shows how pervasive it can be throughout history. But I'm so glad this video offers strategies for overcoming gaslighting in a relationship setting. Kudos to Michael for this wonderful video shedding light on this crucial topic and providing actionable steps for those who may be struggling.

[myrosesorcera]

Knowing when you are being gaslighted is very important in dealing with it. This is a very helpful post for people who are experiencing manipulation and toxic behavior like gaslighting in a relationship. Indeed, we should learn how to spot it in order to counter it. Since it is a common tactic of abusers, we should understand the cycle of abuse too and remove ourselves from such situation.

[shanzidaAkrar]

Addressing the insidious tactics of gaslighting and providing strategies for overcoming it in relationships is a crucial and empowering topic. The parallel drawn to the story of Adam and Eve adds a thought-provoking historical context to this issue, emphasizing how manipulation and doubt have deep roots in human interaction. This podcast's focus on practical strategies not only sheds light on the devastating effects of gaslighting but also equips listeners with tools to protect themselves from its harmful consequences. By acknowledging the mental toll that gaslighting takes and offering actionable solutions, this podcast stands as a valuable resource for individuals navigating challenging relationships and seeking to reclaim their sense of self-worth.

[ricardofrancis]

This Podcast is so much edifying, I had no idea that there was such a term given for being manipulated in a relationship such as "Gaslighting, " your perspective information is definately a tool for self - empowerment.

[neishalucy]

I ended my abusive relationship today. And instead of feeling low, I feel relieved.

[Lauren-bgqp]

Wow! 5 minutes into the show, I knew I needed to see last week's show. It was worth it after all. Thank you for taking the time to treat such a topic as this. Now, I will be more conscious of the people that come around me. I definitely don't want gaslighters around.

[aliciakey]

It's not only in romantic relationships, it's also in friendships and family… this abusive behavior is everywhere!

[generomaguera]

Drawing parallels between biblical narratives and contemporary experiences adds depth to the discussion, emphasizing the enduring relevance of addressing manipulation and control in interpersonal dynamics.

[lqcjefp]

Dealing with gaslighting in relationships is like navigating through a dense fog, where reality feels distorted and your own perceptions are called into question. It starts with recognizing the signs – the subtle manipulations and doubts planted in your mind. From there, it's about finding your anchor in truth and trusting your instincts, even when they're being undermined. Surrounding yourself with supportive allies who validate your experiences can provide a lifeline in the storm, helping you reclaim your sense of self-worth and clarity. Ultimately, it's about setting firm boundaries and prioritizing your emotional well-being, even if it means walking away from toxic dynamics.

[bonitomon]

It's really hard when someone you love gaslights you. Because you love that person, you tend to accept the lies and the manipulation just to keep that person with you but it's not healthy, in fact it is devastating to the victim's mental health. A timeout or letting that person go for good if he/she won't change is a wise decision to make.

[Ad-Lo]

Thank you, Michael, for really clarifying point number 3. Too many professionals counsel victims of gaslighting to try and convince the narcissist of their errors. This is human nature, I do understand, but it is actually very detrimental and as you said, further emboldens the narcissist/manipulator. It also opens the door to co-gaslighting. For example, they can start with the 7th type of gaslighting, i.e. pretending that they have forgotten what abusive tactic they deployed, and then as you continue to “explain to them” that the event did occur, they start to use tactic 6 by majoring on minors. If you further engage them, they will then shift to tactic 4 of bringing in third parties and blaming external stimuli for all of their “poor memory”, your alleged hypersensitivity and the fact that “other people are saying” whatever they want you to believe. Without a doubt, the most effective strategy to avoid this is to briefly and succinctly state that you have expressed your feelings and will now disengage. The example you gave is perfect! With people who are not manipulative, you are trying to deepen relational, communicative and emotional intimacy win the person you are in the relationship with and not to win an argument. With a manipulator, you are simply trying to win back your sanity. You don’t have the energy to deepen anything with a manipulator or narcissist. It’s usually a very bad idea to try. Mainly, because it cannot work.

[newtonsmith]

I’ve been really blessed by this series of gaslighting shows. They were made just with me in mind. Talking things out with my psychotherapist presently. If I think I can bear this anymore or get to make him change, I will go for a divorce to save my mental health.

[santoslovenda]

I couldn't put my finger on it, but this concept perfectly describes my current supervisor. Drawing you in then slandering you unfairly out of nowhere to look good. Everything is just about him… and him ALONE. My gut instinct was right, but this video confirms that I need to avoid my supervisor now...

[franciscamathew]

I started recording my boyfriend. I actually started recording him not to prove that he said those things but for my own sanity because I was “crazy” and “delusional” and couldn’t remember what was actually said. Turns out my memory is pretty freakin’ spot on and used the recordings when told I was nutty and that he had “never said those things.” I started documenting everything. It wasn’t until he brought a girl home (while I was home) and denied it to his friends and family—but then I had photographic evidence that said otherwise. Goodbye oppression, hello happiness. Still going through a divorce, but much happier. Home stretch!

[hstuJuki-hhez]

It's fascinating to draw parallels between the ancient narrative in Genesis and contemporary discussions on gaslighting. Recognizing these manipulation tactics and understanding how to counteract them is crucial for maintaining mental well-being in relationships. The insights provided in the podcast seem valuable, shedding light on strategies to empower individuals and mitigate the detrimental effects of gaslighting.

[Theo-ushl]

I was gaslighted by my girlfriend for almost 2 years. I got out of it by talking to my family. They convinced me to leave her. It was the Best Thing I ever did.

[samanthaenriquez]

Gaslighting could bring agony to the victims. It has negative consequences to their self-esteem and could make them feel like everything that they do is wrong while the narcissist is always right. They tend to lost their sense of self and it leaves a very traumatic scar even after the victim managed to get away.

[mgvkbvy]

Gaslighting victims may experience agony. It lowers their self-esteem and may give them the impression that the narcissist is always correct and they are always wrong. Even when the victim is able to escape, they often lose their sense of self, leaving a deeply painful scar. When someone you love gaslights you, it hurts a lot. Listen in to discover how to take back control and achieve emotional stability. Good Video!

[Sandra.....]

We all have faced situation in relationship but personal and formal relationships where the table is turn upon us and we are made to feel bad for being hurt. Gaslighting is a psychological manipulation wher you begin to doubt your own sanity. Narcissistic personalities are known to use the gaslighting tool in relationships

[Alex-qwlz]

I believe I am a gaslighter and was unaware of the fact until recently. I didn't know the term, but 80% of the time, I do it, it’s just a reflex. It’s not like I'm aware of the harm I'm doing or doing it on purpose.