How To Manage Getting Triggered & Angry - 5 Simple Steps

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We all get triggered.

It doesn’t matter how emotionally intelligent or emotionally mature you are, there are times that things get under our skin, get our blood boiling, or just make us plain angry.

And contrary to popular belief, anger is neither a bad or good emotion - like all others, it's just an emotion.

But it’s how we deal with our anger and how we respond to it that can be used for good or evil.

In this episode of Good For Me TV today, we're going to talk about 5 ways that emotionally intelligent people respond to their anger so that they feel in charge of it, instead of letting it be in charge of them.

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LET'S STAY CONNECTED:

[juliakristinamah]

Which of these strategies are you most looking forward to using next time you feel triggered or angry?

[autumn.redhawke]

I have been demonized for walking away when I feel triggered. Called selfish, accused of running away from my problems, labeled as narcissistic, unable to own up to things. Really it all boils down to me knowing I'm emotional and need to step away but not one person in my life recognizes this.

[pau]

I always cry when I'm angry, and people don't take me seriously and say I'm just being childish and throwing a tantrum, but actually it's my go to response to anger because I don't wanna hurt other people, but if I say what I'm feeling no one listens

[aussieruth]

First, strive to understand before seeking to be understood. (One of my favourite quotes.

[erikkohl]

You speak with great enthusiasm and conviction. Your body language and facial expressions are living, breathing, vibrant punctuation. I would bet my cabin that you speak from serious experience about working on your anger management! You are so gifted with a great abundance of emotional energy. I think it is near certain you had to work hard to learn to harness and channel that energy and to be available to help us do the same.
Enough of my speculating, to get to the point...your knowledge, insight, compassion, and enthusiasm are treasured!

[YG.]

Honestly im here because although im quite calm and reserved in public and with friends n strangers, i find myself snapping at my family quite often and get angry so often qith them and i want to get better cus i feel like ill eventually start snapping at everyone.

[LavenderChocolates]

when someone is rude, sarcastic or attacking me of course I will defend myself . It's hard not to argue back if they are saying something to provoke . Also, It is built up resentment over time from feeling disrespected, lonely, etc. also when I let people slide but when they keep doing it over time I get triggered to get really angry. Especially when I coomunicate how I feel that person blames you for having the problem ( tell you are touchy or sensitive, no control) and they don't try to admit themselves. There is pride from other person. Advice pleas thanks

[learnasl]

"What we want when we are angry is to FEEL heard" This is pure Gold! As a mom (of 6) this is pure gold! Thank you

[carljam]

I pushed him away. One way I realized that I had to work on my overreaction. On the other hand, he was not the right one for me.

[BubbasChibi]

HALTED - you could put an E in there, and call it EMPTY. Emptiness in our lives makes us more susceptible to over-reactions. Do you agree? BTW, thank you for these vids.

[KerryShearer]

Outstanding information, Julia. I like the HALTD acronym!. It's so important to understand how to avoid jumping into the immediate, go-nuclear "reaction" mode in these situations and make a more respectful and intelligent response.

[deannawanzo]

I'm so thankful I found you. You speak logic when I'm illogical, with NO judgments! I so appreciate that you give us all valuable tools for healing and dealing in this life we're living! You've helped me move lots of junk holding me back out of my way to find some peace within myself. What a rare jewel you are, Julia Kristina!!
Thanx A Big Bunch 😄

[mercedesnguyen]

I couldn’t have watched this at a better time. I am having to submerge myself into a new surrounding of people professionally and let’s just call it all “growing pains”. I have been depleted of energy the last week because I feel like I spend more time trying to understand personalities without getting my feelings hurt and not hurting theirs then I do working. This video is just reassuring to me that I can still be in control of who I am and what I can do with strong emotion in general. Thank you so much!

[lhenderson]

Thank you for your site... I'm so pleased to have found a bright and intelligent person with helpful solutions to our everyday emotional very positive!

[accolade]

Anger is a response to having ones shame triggered. Inner child work is key to managing shame triggers and reducing reactivity. But also an understanding of systems theory also helps. Murray Bowen, Jerry Wise and Brene Brown speak well on these topics as well.

[mrssenta]

I realised after watching this great video, that I feel very vulnerable these days. How to deal with this? Myself, contact with others, traps, decisions etc.

[Edzhjus]

That is correct..everyone gets triggered..some are just better at hiding, controlling it. 🙄

[linda]

Love the HALTD spot check!
Hungry
Angry
Lonely
Tired
Discouraged

[pamelasmith]

I definitely react instead of respond and so does my boyfriend. Needless to say, we have a dangerously explosive relationship.

[ellenweir]

I find your videos very valuable and helpful and often share them with friends and family. I really like your hair in this video. Very flattering!