Red Flags in a Relationship: 7 Signs You CANNOT Ignore | Relationship Advice for Women by Mat Boggs

Mat Boggs shares dating advice for women and Red Flags in a Relationship: 7 Signs You CANNOT Ignore

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VIDEOS ABOUT COMMUNICATION WITH MEN (Communication Advice)

3 Things You Can Say To Make Him Feel Like a Man

5 Things Never to Say When Fighting (How To Communicate)

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VIDEOS ABOUT DATING ADVICE

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Funny First Date Story! Gotta hear this?

What NOT to do on a First Date (Strange But True)

VIDEOS ABOUT UNDERSTANDING MEN

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Scared of getting hurt again? Use this mindset?

When Should You Sleep With Him?

VIDEOS ABOUT WHAT MEN WANT / HOW TO TELL IF HE LIKES YOU
The Kind of Confidence Men Find Sexy

5 Unusual Signs Your Man is into You!

How to tell if he is emotionally available

VIDEOS ABOUT CONFIDENCE AND SELF-WORTH

3 Affirmations to Attract Love

3 Ways to Create More Self-Love

Uncool is the New Cool (5 ?Uncool? Things I Do)

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Mat Boggs Bio:

As a sought-after dating and relationship coach for women and international speaker, Mat Boggs has helped thousands of women understand men, improve their relationships, and attract the relationship they want.

As the best-selling author of Project Everlasting, and creator of Cracking The Man Code, Mat Boggs? dating and relationship advice has been featured on national media including The Today Show, CNN, Headline News, Oprah and Friends, and many more.

Mat's Mission: To increase love in the world, one heart at a time.

As a dating coach for women, Mat believes that your history does not determine your destiny, and that you are more powerful than any circumstance you are facing. The relationship dream in your heart really can become the life you love living!

Mat Boggs highly acclaimed relationship programs have served women around the world in all age groups from 20yrs old to over 70yrs old.

Written By: Mathew Boggs

Related Topics:
Dating Advice For Women
Relationship Advice For Women
Relationship Coach For Women
Dating Coach For Women
Dating, Relationships, understanding men, Dating Advice, Love Advice Relationship Advice, How Men Think, What Men Want, What attracts men, How to attract a man, how to create lasting love, how to know if he likes you, signs your man likes you.

[mikiwells]

Looking in hindsight, a lot of these red flags were in my relationship. What few times we would be around my family and friends, he would say things to embarrass me. If someone wronged me, he would side with the other person. Many times he would say he was being an ahole on purpose. He would try to tear me down as a form of control. When I left him, it was one of the best things I ever did.

[rezotydnic]

7 Red Flags In Relationships
1. Your partner is quick to get defensive.
2. The rules don't apply to your partner.
3. White lies.
4. He's over critical and subtly critical.
5. He's a bad sport when he's doing something you want to do.
6. He minimizes your wins.
7. He cannot be with your unhappiness.
Clearly these describe a narcissist. If you meet one, back away. Quickly or slowly, back away. No. RUN AWAY.

[yourfutureisnow]

This can be used for your friendships as well.

[Mayfloweralways]

They can’t apologize. Or if they do, it’s not to own it and tell you how they can address it. They just say something like “I’m sorry that you feel that way.”

They run hot and cold. One moment they love you. The next they want to pick an argument and they can’t be reached. That’s usually someone who has other options they’re spending time with, whether early dating or after they claim they’re being exclusive

They don’t want to compromise. It feels like they are playing chess with you, waiting to yell, “ check mate! I win! “ it feels like they’re trying to win by not giving something you want. They will even do it with something simple. Like, you ask them to do something for you and they always to have an excuse ready.

This goes hand in hand with the previous. They don’t really seem bothered by disappointing you. The have a lot of “but” excuses. Yet they don’t honestly seem bothered or try to make it up to you.

[OkamiSun]

Just entered a new relationship and am still learning about my partner and dating occasionally so I haven't noticed any of these signs... But I see a few in myself. So I'm here to learn how to leave those bad habits behind and grow as a person so I can be the best that I can for him.

[HeatherNBell]

Inability to say sorry and also the silent treatment during the pain. There’s a difference between being present with someone during times of pain, and giving them the silent treatment because it’s an inconvenience.
Deflection is another red flag in my experience. Always redirecting the conversation away from the issue they are contributing too, or have directly created due to words and actions or inactions.

[nikkib]

Just sent this video to my daughter she's in a relationship and it falls under every single one of these I told her to leave him now before it goes to far

[rebekahguerrero]

They are unwilling to compromise, so everything always has to be the way they're used to doing it or from their perspective. Also, they avoid having the difficult conversations.

[adrianacorrea]

You just gave huge information, saw all of this in my previous marriage. Now I know!

[tatyanapizzimenti]

Thank you, Matt, this video helped me a lot! I would add two more red flags: jealousy, or basic misstrust, as well as sexual /social discrimination.
I just broke up with a guy who saw a sexual invitation in every smile I gave any male, no matter the context of the conversation. It took him some time to say anything but I could read his body language and got his negative nonverbal signs right before we had our first confronting conversation about that. And it got even worse, as soon as I mentioned a word about anythig related to any of my previous relationships. I'm almost fifty years old, and have some baggage of experience, I stand to it all, and have nothing to hide or be ashamed of. However, this man would prefer me pretending to be a blank sheet of paper.... Further more, I was shocked to hear from him in a conversation about social help networks that victims of rape were all themselves to blame. It took me almost half a year to realise that there can be no future for me with that guy, no matter how romantic and lovegiving he was. I wish I hadn't dated him that long.

[honestmom]

These red flags SO describe my ex. Thanks for the reminder to flip these and concentrate on the green lights so we attract who we do want to share our life with. Appreciate you, Mat, and your very useful videos!

[uncouthgirly]

Actually finding this super helpful to figure out what I need to work on in myself before my next relationship (white lies, self-esteem, etc)

[lynntasch]

Sounds alot like narcissism. My ex to a T.

[nikkik]

Brilliant advice to share with people, thank you for all you do 🙏 my kids dad displayed all those traits but cloaked with smiles and fun while mirroring my values to lure me in until after i was pregnant! Life's an interesting lesson! Wish I'd received your wisdom 20 years ago but am happy to be learning now and teaching my kids (and myself!) great boundaries, self worth, kindness and healthy behaviours. Thank you

[summerbardia]

Mat...thank you so much for sharing these. I am a smart woman, a health care provider who feels so confident with helping to advocate for my patients, friends & family...but advocating for myself, especially with matters of the heart, was a strength I had not yet learned to embody. Now thankfully it is a new skillset I am evolving within myself.

My ex-husband had 3 out of these 7...and boy did they wear on me (plus a few others). I was constantly unsure whether I was seeing red flags or if I was being too 'ready to run away' from the relationship bc of fear.
-he was the ultimate bad boy, but made it sound like he was ready to grow up...which we both figured out, in time, wasn't the case. I love how you frame this...if he's willing to break the rules for small stuff he'll be willing to break the rules for big stuff also...yup, I found that out the hard way.
-he flat out lied about important questions I asked him early on...and then eventually when he did tell me the truth, I soon realized they were only half truths. In 1 phone conversation, I found him in 4 lies/half truths and each time I called him out he used another half truth to try to cover up..and on and on! And then he got pissed off at me for calling him out each time. This one took about 3 years for me to realize (while we were in the process of divorcing or getting back together) ...it's hard to know something is a lie...until you do...
-and whenever I was having an emotionally yucky day...sad, mad, etc...he would get super angry and huffy...he always said that he hated seeing the people he loved hurting...but in the end it always became about calming HIS anger and rage and my emotional needs became unimportant...even to my own self!
....gosh as I list these, I'm blown away by how I stayed so long...how I gave him the benefit of the doubt over my own gut (and boy my gut would YELL at me for some of these)...I would focus on the good, the amazing stuff and ignore the red flags...it all seemed to creep up slowly & infrequently ...and then when my heart was so attached the frequency of the red flags became more & more and eventually when I hit a wall...I threw up my own white flag and called it quits...quite in opposition to my heart.

Another red flag...
-he made major decisions about our time together/whether to fulfill my needs, based on his family's input or their needs. For example he missed my bday and bday party (my 1st bday with him) so that his sister and her kids could drop him off to be with me at my beach rental, the next day....so they could get beach time in....that was at our 6 month point...and looking back I should have turned them away when they finally showed up and said, sorry, too little too late...but I sucked it up. And this was a few months after we missed his sister-in-laws bday, bc we were away. He was freaked out that we missed it and was adamant that we'd have to make it up and take her out for dinner....!!! Yet, it was OK to miss his own partners bday...yikes, I was blinded by oxytocin, for sure!! And the final straw was during covid...my mom had stage 4 metastatic cancer and needed to be on o2 all the time. We both wanted to be able to see our families and friends...so I asked him to wear a mask around anyone who wasn't me so I could safely see my mom...I thought that was pretty reasonable...turns out he didn't think it was reasonable and lied about it for 6 months. When I called him out on it he just kept saying he didn't take my needs seriously (well, thats pretty obvious, i thought to myself...and he had no reason why except that he didnt want to make anyone ELSE feel uncomfortable)...and it wasn't until his sister told him it was OK that he wore a mask around everyone that he was ready to 'submit' (my word) to my needs...that's when I decided to sleep on my next decision...woke up the next day and told him to leave. Boy was that hard...and easy. Easy bc I felt so betrayed...but hard bc I loved him (or rather the idea of who I wanted him to be) so much and really wanted HIM to be the man I would grow old with.

The blessing and curses of the wonderful oxytocin...and...of what I've learned were so many underlying beliefs that I held about my worthiness of love...
Some days I still miss him bc there truly were A LOT of wonderful times together, shared loves, decades of knowing each other from a far, similar dreams...and then I remember the reality of our true fit, our contributions to each other and the relationship...and I realize I made the absolute right choice to MOVE ON. Now I know that next time, I need to be slower, more discerning and listen to my gut.

Thank you so much for this video & list...having a concrete list to refer to for external validation of my inner voice as I learn how to listen, is so very reaffirming and helps me to feel confident in my interperetations of the new inner language I'm growing more and more accustomed to.

With much gratitude, thank you.

[wasiatussadiyah]

hi mat, thank you for your advice, i have been following your advice since last year, I overcame my traumatic because of my past relationship, i tried to ignore guys who gave me the red flags, now i found the love of my live, and finally I got married, and it's wonderful i believe that love is still exist ❤️ . keep doing this kindness matt, it's very important for the girl to know your channel 😊.
spread ❤️

[katemiller]

You know, I’m learning things to be a better partner myself too, within my own marriage 😂
Thanks Mat, you present it all in such a positive, non attacking manner and it just makes sense. Grateful for what you do 🙏🏼

[tertain]

Competes with me in everything and has to be the winner.

[dumitriudaniela]

the perfect description of my husband 😪. Im trying to find a way to escape this craziness.

[kimt]

Great vlog; how a guy makes you feel is important. He could be not a model type yet nicer and you are so much better off. I've had a first hand experience with the guy doesn't want to do what YOU want to do. Yet, when it's with his family, your expected to go. When it's something HE wants to do.