The Narcissist Makes You Leave

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Tune in to hear the perspective of a self aware narcissist. That’s me - Ben Taylor a narcissist in recovery trying to promote awareness, healing, growth and change. I do that by these videos on here, TikTok, Instagram and Facebook.

Platforms I am on:

[breakthrough]

That abuse is horrendous … it is rape of the soul .. literally after such a one sided entanglement you are searching for the person you were … a new identity within you comes to be … once you heal you will find that you won’t deal with such delusional toxic sub human people you will develop safe boundaries .. self love .. and you will embrace your alone time ..

[korab.]

They make you leave and then blame you for it.

[danirichardson]

The biggest lie mine has said is, "I've been nothing but real with you the whole time."

[wendy]

I stayed a very, very long time. Towards the end I felt so invisible to others, that I had to leave before I became invisible to myself.

[desertangelfish]

The constant seeking of attention from other females and talking about his exes, was the tipping point for me to pursue my freedom and happiness from the insanity.

[rubypaige]

He definitely forced me out, I knew something was underlying because it got worse in the last month I was with him. The digs about my kids, I didn’t do enough, and his false accusations of me with other men. There was so much more but the stress and pressure was just too much. He is still playing the victim.

[straightcashhomey]

This is all so accurate. My ex either felt smothered or abandoned. Anytime the relationship progressed toward healthy, loving, and calm she had to ruin it by sabotaging. At one point, we were booking a trip together and after I paid for it she looked at me and said “I afraid I’m going to push you away.” This is when I began to suspect her of cheating, most likely because she felt out of control in a stable relationship. Regardless, Narcissists know right from wrong and just don’t care who they hurt in the process of getting their emotional needs met. It’s extremely difficult for a neurotypical person to comprehend the mindset of someone so mentally ill.

[spacegirl]

That last moment with my ex husband was him looking hopeful and saying maybe we COULD work it out after all. I'd been telling him we could work it out for years, gave him plenty of chances, but it would require effort on his part. That was just too much to care about me. After ten years of neglect and abuse and pushing the limits of what I would tolerate, giving me the benefit of the doubt and trusting me was still too fucking much for him.

He tried to manipulate me even as I was walking out the door with kisses and sweet words. "Don't look back. Just don't look back when you get outside. Don't look back."

He wouldn't even walk me outside to my dad and stepmom waiting with the Uhaul to take me away from my dead life with him. That's how much he cared about me -- he couldn't even show his face to my parents who he hates for five seconds. Threw me out and watched me from the window. He stood there in the dim morning light in our apartment, looking like hell, but I know secretly thrilled to death that me -- his wife, his problem, his forced adversary, his shame, his reminder -- was no longer going to be a source of unpleasantness for him anymore. He got everything he wanted from me, and when there was nothing left after he'd drained me dry, he won. He had accomplished his goal of breaking me and ruining me. I am the bad person because I wanted too much that he wouldn't give. I am the bad person he couldn't please because he didn't bother trying. I am the bad person who left him. I am the bad person who divorced him. I am the bad person. I am the bad person.

All games. All manipulation. All lies. But at least I know it and understand it now. Thank you, Ben.

I'm happy to be free. Also, I never looked back. I know how this story ends. I didn't look back because I was leaving nothing of value behind.

God bless you all.

[tracimattox]

Most narcissist are unaware and they cannot change.

[beautifulsmile]

This is what happened to me however, I fell
In the trap of reactive abuse. The more he hurt me the more I became angry because I would spill my guts out to him and he would look at me like I was nothing to him. I’m sure this devil has lied to his family about me. He had two failed marriages and other failed relationships hopefully his family people is smart enough to see through the smoking mirrors. This is worst thing I have ever been through next to loosing my Mother. Most people are not capable of understanding the impact that it does to your psyche.

[rosierb]

I realised that my ex destroyed my image so that his family would think poorly of me. That I was aggressive, argumentative, and a gold digger. His family were mostly also NPD and ASPD.

[imezryou]

got to say it's very odd so many people are dealing with this same issue telling almost the same story this has to be a spiritual entity we are dealing with. this is a demonic spirit we all have encountered.

[nehachoudhary]

I completely agree with this - the narc does things that they know will trigger you to get a reaction out of you. In my case one of the scenario was about sharing their plans, their whereabouts and availability everyday. They did it so often, over a period of 3-4 years, and one day suddenly started withholding all information. On confronting about the change in patterns, there was a counter question about why do you need to know my availability? I had been so accustomed to their sharing of smaller things about themselves and looked at that as a piece of affection or moreover a way to stay on the same page or even contributing to their life. My confrontation was taken as some form of controlling or mandating behavior and I was made out to be the bad person in the end, to add to their story of victimization.

[krissysturgul]

If you choose to leave the narcissist, be prepared for the worst because they will launch the worst attack on you that you’ve ever experienced. I just divorced my husband of 25 years and his revenge on me through out the divorce was unbelievable. He purposely prolonged it for a little over two years with huge attorney fees and really nothing left. But guess what? I made it and I am rid of him. It was all worth it, but it was definitely not easy at all. Good luck to those who decide to leave. God be with you🙏

[motowngirl]

It’s the same feeling as an alcoholic
It’s and addiction, you have to break the addiction

[mellymeow]

I went back to my narc after a very bad fight and separation. When we reconnected... i initially felt really good about it, because he was love bombing me. Once he took his mask off again, which took literally maybe 2 days, the feeling of dread that came over me was so so heavy. I have never in my life hated someone that i loved so much. I didn't realize this was even a form of abuse or that it had a name. But this is 100% what i went through for years. I was never an angry person, never had anger issues until i started dating him. Even i was astounded by the level of rage he was able to drum up in me. He knew all the buttons to push, and loved to "talk things through." I would try to end an argument, and tell him i wasn't in a sound mind to continue talking. and he would push and push and make me keep raging. watching this and thinking about my experiences really shows me how deeply twisted a person he was. He was literally getting joy out of seeing me lose my mind.

[mumzthewurd]

If they realize you KNOW who they really are, they can’t have you around warning the new supply, ruining their image.

[nadianohelani]

You reminded me of so many horrible things that I forced myself to forget or minimize. I don’t feel as crazy anymore, thank you.

[phoenixrising]

That slight acknowledgment just keeps you on the hook which buys them time to continue on ...it’s part of the trauma bonding

[LS-wcnw]

The ex narc made me leave, then immediately changed the lock on the doors. I took that as though we were done, then I received an email from them trying to hoover me back. Totally ignored it and moved on.