5 Signs of Emotionally Manipulative People

Are you being emotionally manipulated by the people in your life? This may be people you love who are applying emotional manipulation or emotional abuse tactics such as your parents or your friends or your husband or wife. Emotional manipulation can show up in many different ways, and we may not always see if we are being emotionally manipulated. There are several signs of emotional manipulation, some more drastic or stark than others. This could manifest or look like toxic parents or narcissist parents or husband or wife or perhaps emotionally immature friends. This emotional manipulation may have also been childhood emotional neglect; I talk more about childhood emotional neglect in the videos below. Here are the 5 signs of emotionally manipulative people; signs to look out for if you think you are being emotionally manipulated or emotionally abused by someone in your life.

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[pam]

I grew up with parents who taught me to put everyone else first. It was my job to please other people

[ThumbnailGrail]

#2 is so relatable. You feel like the bad guy because they're the one's crying. Craziest part is when I remain strong and carefully select my words to be as communicative as possible without being filled with excess hurt words, they say that you're the one playing victim. Sometimes sorting things out feels like an impossibility, so videos like this can be comforting. Thanks!

[SirHatchporch]

Yes, please do a video on emotionally manipulative parents. The long term damage they can do can be devastating, and I'm sure a lot of us are still going through that as we age.

[susi]

I really would appreciate a video on reassessing relationships. It’s so easy to get stuck in a dynamic because “we’ve been friends for so many years, ” but I recently had to step back from a few people and didn’t realize they weren’t good for me. I’d love a video on signs it’s time to reassess and what criteria to use

[richardl]

Yes please do a video on emotionally manipulative parents.

[kenrickbautista]

Videos like these always scares me. I don't really know if I'm the one being manipulative or if I'm being manipulated by others. It's so hard!!! 😣

[jennaywar]

My parents are getting older and are not in good health. They manipulate me on a regular basis- especially my mom. I feel like she knows exactly what she is doing by always playing the victim- the "helpless little old lady". I love them and do feel bad that they seem to have one bad situation after another, and so I've done my best to help as much as I can when I am able. However, I'm not at a point in my life to take care of them, or to drop what I need to do in order to make sure they get their needs met. I'm working, and going back to college, and trying to better myself and my life. This past semester was a particularly tough one for me, and I got guilt tripped to the point that I would regularly have chest pain because I was not able to come to the rescue for them like I normally would. It really sucks once your eyes are opened to what is really going on. I never had a problem with helping them, but now I realize that it's EXPECTED of me, and if I'm not able to help, then I'm made to feel like I'm being neglectful or selfish. My mom doesn't seem to take my situation into account- it's like she only cares about what SHE'S going through. It's just so upsetting to realize that you need to set such strong boundaries with your own parents.

[arthurpenfield]

Emotionally draining and controlling humans suck because they CHOOSE to be that way and it pisses me off.

[idied]

Please do something about emotionally manipulative parents. My dad was the worst a lot of these and I think I see some in my mom as well and am working on overcoming that so I don't continue to let myself fall victim to that in future relationships

[lashadi]

Yes! Please do video on emotionally manipulative parents and/or being around others/family that are emotionally manipulative without realizing it. I think you almost touched on it in the end, with how to tell if you are indeed being manipulated. I find with my mother, and even with open conversation on the topic at times, she doesn't realize some of what she does is in fact guilt tripping for example, or doesnt realize that is harmful. She has already lost (maybe not forever?) a relationship with one daughter, and I really want her to heal more (go back to therapy, not be as co dependent) but being the parentalized child, I want to guide her out of the many negative behaviors from her lofe history of trauma and coping behaviors for her untreated adhd and possibly autism (like me). It's a sticky situation for me, as we are close and I had a history of trauma growing up with her, but she is not as outwardly emotionally abusive as my father. Thanks ❤

[weirdlittlesister]

I'm very happy that you added the "it's not necessarily them" at the endf of the video, and especially the five questions at the end made me interested in codependency a lot more than manipulative parents. I don't have a relationship and currently actively despise men, and I was about to comment "if a man ever approaches you with attention and affection, RUN" but now I'm contemplating that maybe it's because my unresolved traumas from my past relationships that somehow draw me towards more and more of these and refusing to date altogether isn't going to solve this problem...

[caleuxx]

The Victim blame shifting, etc. --- It seems to me, that this behavior is often from people, who have a lot of CORE SHAME and cannot accept their own imperfections and/or have great difficulty accepting reality in life People who behave like this are usually immature and many times suffered a significant trauma when they were young (maybe neglect).... However it is their responsibility to get take proper actions to try and fix, what is wrong.... (getting

[AilsaZeiman]

Dear Kati, thank you so much for sharing these precious insights with us!❤ The most striking statement you made from my point of view, was that a person who has people pleasing tendencies and is not self-aware of it, might blame others for manipulation. I understand it as inability to recognize and/or accept own one's self shadow. This is why, it is so easy to perceive the other as manipulative. In a way this wrong label is used as a justification not to have to deal with oneself's responsibility for one's own feelings. I wish everyone the self reflection to learn to recognize one's own shadow. Because our shadow is capable to sabotage our perception of people around us in a crucial way.

[sd.kfz.]

Welp. Both good and bad news for me. Good news: I've really dodged quite a few bullets by now. Bad news: I used to exhibit some of these traits, up until I realized that I reaaaally screwed up more than a couple times, started thinking about how I could behave in another way to not cause any pain or harm.

Still thinking. Some months in therapy by now. But videos like this one do help between sessions and well complement the meds I've been prescribed. Thank you, sincerely, for content like this. It does help people.

[TheOrignalTRockz]

Please do a video about emotionally manipulative parents. Great videos!

[Moon_Fire_Water]

Kati is such a great teacher and speaker ! love how she sets up her talks and videos. easy to follow along with

[siennaprice]

My stepmom was like this. Guilt tripping, crying for empathy and sympathy, gaslighting, and many other ways. I used to doubt myself because of it. But I think the thing I struggle with is limiting and restricting myself. Emotionally manipulation led me to restricting myself, downplaying my feelings, not liking myself for crying or feeling sensitive. Not allowing myself to do certain things that actually benefit me, but the world frowns upon it. Withholding love and affection from myself when I’m upset, crying or dysregulated. I have overcame self doubt, it’s conditional self love and restricting myself that I have to overcome.

[tracy]

My Mother is a master at all of these types of manipulation...and I think she has invented some new ones!

[captainnemo]

Yes, to one on manipulative parents please.

[benmumick]

Thank you so much for sharing your video with us because i have once dealt and grew up unfortunately with a man who my mom dated back when i was 9-12 years of age and he was very manipulative, deceitful, exploitative, predatory and not always honest. from what i remember during those moments when he and my mom were together he was really charming, caring, playful and generous towards me only and to my sister as well. at the same time he stole and took advantage of my mom and gaslit me at times for things that i didn't even do. he lied at times in promising things but always ended up failing through them and would simply leave the items laying in his garage. He exploited my attempts each time i tried reconnecting with him in the end after he and my mom had broken up. I remember in the end like he disappeared on her so many times and wouldn't answer everytime she asked where he was and would get mad when he answered her. He once stole gold from my mom and then accused me of the theft when i was 12.