7 Signs of Emotional Neglect in Marriage | Sharmen Kimbrough

Are you married to, or in a relationship with, an emotionally absent partner? Do you make attempts to connect emotionally and either get no effort from your partner to reciprocate, or worse yet, are met with contempt or verbal attacks? In this video, Sharmen Kimbrough from the Marriage Recovery Center talks about some of the reasons your partner may be emotionally absent from your relationship, the impact it has on you, and what it takes to have true, authentic connection in any relationship.

Dr. Hawkins and his team of experts offer education and professional training as well as treatment for narcissistic and emotional abuse.

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About

The internet is inundated with hyperbole and misinformation about narcissism, leaving many people confused and hopeless. Get the facts about narcissism and emotional abuse from someone who has been researching, writing about and treating narcissism and emotional abuse for over a decade.

Dr. Hawkins is a best-selling author and clinical psychologist with over three decades of experience helping people break unhealthy patterns and build healthier relationships. He is the founder and director of the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute which offers education, training and counseling for people who want to break free of, and heal from, emotional abuse.

Whether the perpetrator of the abuse is your spouse, partner, parent, boss, friend or family member, we offer practical advice for anyone trapped in a toxic, destructive relationship. In addition to narcissism & emotional abuse, topics include covert, reactive, spiritual, secondary, relationship trauma and more.

#emotionalneglect #emotionalabuse #marriage

[tryagainagain]

I would love to hear advice on how to escape the vicious circle of need neglect, ie. "Husband ignores me emotionally but still expects sex. I'm literally, physically incapable of that because of the contempt I feel from him. He takes that as denying him and uses it as an excuse for ignoring me...etc." And round and round we go.

[Hope-czfg]

I was sneered at, smirked at and given the silent treatment, put down in front of people and my husband expected our relationship to carry on as per normal. He spoke at me, not to me. Didn’t look at me when speaking to me. That was no marriage or normal relationship

[janclebro]

In the bouncing ball analogy, my narcissist doesn't even see the ball.

[amandineminer]

I love the ball analogy. In some cases, you can be sending a ball and they send back a different one. Completely invalidating you by ignoring the ball you sent in the first place.

[confusedwhynot]

I think sometimes due to emotional neglect will cause a personal to just shut down and disconnect for survival. For me I felt burdened down with all the responsibility of the family and the business. I was struggling without his support in anyway. I can't live this way anymore. I have spent a lot of time in grief and now I have to file for divorce.

[personalinfo]

Wow. God’s grace that this topic was published just in this new season. My situation is indeed serious. But the Lord God is already and always at work. Please pray in the name of Jesus…

[annekecor]

You described my life perfectly! My 3rd. husband shows very little interest in anything I say or do. I wait on him hand and foot, our home is spotless, I'm an excellent cook and even bake bread! Yet he has become a non communicative, inconsiderate guest in our home who does nothing except pay the bills. I have considered divorce many times, but feel guilty because he suffers from the onset of Parkinson's disease. My disabled children are now gone so I have no-one left, but am so very tired in this emotional neglectful relationship.

[saladgirl]

Thank you so much for this enlightening talk, please add a profound sense of loneliness to your list .

[rebeccacraig]

It does take work, however, it’s like pushing sand uphill if your spouse isn’t capable of mutuality, authenticity and reciprocity. The emotional heavy lifting remains on the emotionally neglected spouse. It’s exhausting and not sustainable.

[HollyNYC]

My husband is mean, extremely loud and is an emotional time bomb....It's very stressful being near him. 😢

[LL-jdmn]

I've been goung through thus for years. I can't even understand why, but this is what it's been sounding like. I can't do it anymore.

[Ann-pnor]

hit the nail on the head for me. Thank you.

[Aetherfield]

Please have her on again! She explains this issue better than all others.

[fairygurl]

Here's to Being Authentically Braver 💞

[lisafarmen]

Thank you so mush..one of the best podcasts ive heard. Yes so helpful..i will be going to your website to find out hiw to reach out.

[MeCynthiaAnn]

THANK YOU.
GREAT VIDEO
God bless you so much.
From JANESVILLE, WI

[thejesuschic]

This is exactly what my in-laws do while I am present at their house, it’s like looking through a glass window on the outside. They will hear and talk to each other, as well as my husband but will completely ignore me. Even if I ask the same question as my husband to them, they will only answer him. It’s a very odd feeling, a bit like being invisible.

[annabanzon]

Some spouses use their spouse for finances and or.to hide behind in society. These kinds of.people will negoect your words and emotions because they need you to survive.

[gurupi]

I'm trying to understand my situation.
My wife has a health problem and became darker and darker as she got more depressed over about 7 years. She would talk about how she wants to die young, she'd abuse our son, our every conversation for several years was about hating my son, America, and wanting to hurt herself. She didn't do anything around the house, and my mother-in-law and I coordinated so she wouldn't be alone with the kids, ever. Listening didn't help, doing things to help didn't help, she wouldn't take any advice. She refused all my urgings for her to get professional therapy. Finally I said 'I can't take this anymore; you've got to talk about your health to a therapist. You can't just drop all your vitriol and hate onto me."
About a month later, she did see a therapist, but it didn't help; she completely withdrew and stopped functioning for about 6 months. After that, she did interact with the kids again, but she was completely cold toward me, never acknowledged the suffering she caused to me, but instead only brings up the time I put up a boundary and said she needed to talk to a real therapist. In her eyes, she's the victim. I don't care who's the victim or not; I want to be married to a human again, and not a robot.

Since then, she's been better with kids, but all feeling toward me is gone. The only time we have sex is make-up sex maybe once every 2 months, with no feeling, after I've decided to leave her. If I reach out, talk about physical contact, do anything romantic, initiate contact or sex, she pulls away; she must be in total control of initiation. At the same time that I'm not allowed to reach out, nearly the impetus is on me to restore the emotional connection.

Needless to say, this has left me feeling extremely lonely, jerked around emotionally, walking on eggshells, with no long term planning. I've wanted to remodel my kitchen for 3 years, but haven't committed because I expect I'll need the money for a divorce lawyer. It's very difficult because I'm grieving the family life I wish I'd had, the relationship we once had, the person she used to be, and feeling incredibly guilty that I can't keep going like this to keep my kids' family together, but also weak and naive for not having left yet.

[carrad]

I know no one is going to change.

Need emotional suffering to end.
Brain fog, cognitive capability, auto immune diseases all I see in victims of emotional abuse.

Rage and anger to simmer down. Not wait for emotional titbits from other, not need fake care or fake niceness that is shown. And be strong enough to move forward.

Many a times such abusive people are born with rage or extra neediness or such things on extreme and get average empathy parents and then as adult these people destroy life of all those they are in close relationship with.