Does Silence Make The Dismissive Avoidant Miss You? | Dismissive Avoidants & Relationship Silence

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In this video, I talk about what happens when you go silent while dating a dismissive avoidant, will they miss you?

How do you handle when your partner or person you're dating goes silent? what feelings does that bring up in you?

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I’m Thais Gibson, welcome to my channel, and thank you for stopping by!

This is a channel designed for you, to be used as a resource to create lasting transformation in your personal and professional life. Here you’ll receive an ongoing series of personal development and spiritual growth videos for you to expand your awareness and find resolution and deep understanding within.

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#RelationshipSilence #PersonalDevelopmentSchool #PDS #ThaisGibson #AttachmentStyles
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6 weeks to 3 months is insane. I can not realistically ever be with someone who’s okay with ignoring me for that long.

Itsvanessadove
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My DA said they were relieved when they ran, because they felt weren’t hurting me anymore. Meanwhile I was absolutely destroyed.

oohtravie
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Thais said silence may or may not make DA miss you, but the point is that use silence to heal yourself. To stay out of the situation, so that you can see clearly if the relationship is toxic. Silence is not used to get ex back but to give you a clear vision if you want go back.

In my case, I don’t. It’s 2 months now. I still have strong desires for him but I know he is not healed. Going back together would be the same disaster all over again.

brookelight
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a DA broke up with me... never had an experience like that in my life. the coldness was brutal but helped me (anxious) to really connect with my inner child and higher self, get to know my needs and learning to fulfill them myself. at the end I am glad it happened because I grew so much. understanding that she is a DA helped a lot because otherwise I could not make sense of the brutalitywith which she severed ties from one day to the other (all via messages, the last time I saw her, she gave me a kiss, smiled and said "see you soon") hopefully I will recognize those patterns sooner and am not drawn so much to emotionally unavailable people.

zappthezapper
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Dismiss the Avoidant. All problems solved.

technoutopia
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How to date a DA, pro-tips: Don't.

perspicacity
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My boyfriend is a DA.

When we first started dating there was SO much push and pull. Eventually he “ran away” and I thought he’d never come back. I was so heart broken.
But he called me 3 weeks later. He said “I realized I pushed you away because I felt the way you treat me was too good to be true and it was only a matter of time before you hurt me. I self sabotage.” Basically anytime he’s “uncomfortable because he’s ‘comfortable’” he runs away and pushes whoever away because He doesn’t know what to do with that feeling.

kenndinordhoff
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The DA loved me when I basically put him last on my list priorities… ☹️

leilacarvalho
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They only come back once everyone else abandons them or they get bored with other people. Them missing you means absolutely NOTHING because if/ when they come back the cycle is likely to continue. It shouldn’t matter if they miss you.

Ang.
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So I was a DA, and I used to ask this woman out once a year, and she'd always say yes, and we've done that once a year for about 10 years(we finally reached the hand holding stage on the last date wohoo). Then I did the work and I healed, and I realized OMG I had been stringing this poor lady along and how toxic it must have been. So I talked to her again, apologized, asked her out again and promised things would be better. She accepted, but plot twist: She is a DA, and once a year is about the pace she is comfortable with, she was NOT okay with us trying to date weekly or monthly.

So that happened...

Joe-jcol
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I feel like this video, "Does silence make the DA miss you, " would be a little more authentic to the lived experience of the ex of a DA if it had been a simple, honest, one word answer: "No."

CaitlinWoodstock
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My DA said “this is no longer serving me it’s not who I am or who I want to be, we’re not compatible it’s all over the place” when I pushed for us separating. We never really got to know each other after 1.5 years of dating because of her. It was all surface level partying drinking and having a good time. I wanted to get to know her I wanted her to get to know me. Every blue moon she’d share something new. The last real thing she shared with me was when she asked have I ever had a dark thought. I asked her to elaborate and she mentioned for the first time ever that she wanted to cut herself to feel because she was so numb. It took everything to share a dark thought I had years ago about ending my own life because I felt alone but I did and we discussed life and fell asleep. After that for a whole week she became distant. If I didn’t reach out she probably wouldn’t have and it just hurt. Made me feel like I was so insignificant to her and whoever she was always texting whether friends or whoever was more important than me. Even when we were sharing an empty space together just us two she’d be in her phone not present. When I asked for her to be present it would cause arguments. So I wonder if she even thinks of me since we never really got to know each other deeply. I’m FA and this time around I don’t miss her like I did the last time we separated. This time it feels like a relief even though I wanted her so bad. I got to see her this time around for who she was and though I didn’t expect it because she lied so much in the past I still had a deep desire to be with her…I still do I just don’t think it’s mutual, and that I’m moving on to love myself and eventually be in the place for real secure and healthy love to greet me.

loria
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I recently learned I'm a DA. I started watching videos and reading into it to learn more and its disheartening to hear of so many people having bad experiences with us. I consider myself to be someone who was thrusted into a caregiver role at young age and I'm trying to rebound from that enmeshment. If anyone one reads this I hope you understand there are DAs out there who do want to have happy healthy relationships too, do don't dream of harm, and are willing to explore their emotions.

ronisila
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My DA was so much fun to be around. When we were together, I lost track of time and space, because I knew there was no place in the world where I'd rather be. It was a feeling of being in the right place, at the right time, with the right person. We were just naturally drawn to each other, almost half our lives.

But we all know what happens when deep feelings evolve - after the most intimate and loving night you've ever had together, there come stonewalling, shut down, and complete silence, like they even never existed.

(And I - being an FA on the extreme end of the spectrum - too had my own significant contributions to our fall.)

Now, in our 30's, I've made my peace with him, and I wish for him to experience true, fearless love, as he deserves. I will always remember him, though.

SatieSatie
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They will miss you but they’ll miss you they way they “cared” about you — inconsistently. Notice how your relationship while they’re gone is the exact same as it was when they’re around.

WendiRenay
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Video request: the difference between a DA and someone who is just an asshole. A lot of comments seem to be where a layoerson has diagnosed someone as a DA when they are really just a huge jerk.

misschanandelerbong
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Can we come to the conclusion they should not be in relationships ... get people to love them and then immediately back off. That is not normal and it's not okay. They need help. STOP IT.

sstruthinclusive
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I have to agree with a lot of people here; I'm currently having my first experience with a hardcore DA, and thankfully giving my familiarity with this subject material, I have kept my distance (It's fun, they are very attractive, but that's about it. Can see the disaster it would be already to try and get more involved).

Having had both FA and AP experiences, I'm sorry that I have to agree. Unless you revel in self-abuse and feeling isolated, unheard and alone, they are to be avoided. At least APs and FAs have their periods where they are highly attentive and actually have feelings.

DAs are likely to be rendered obsolete by the first sex robots with conversation skills. At least they won't be verbally abusive.

bp
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If you are waiting around for anyone then you are wasting your time DA or not. Who cares how they feel move on. If you understand DAs then they can only offer superficial situationships, nothing more! Find a secure person instead 😊

Pr_
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I'm somewhat avoidant myself and I have a friend who is very avoidant, and I would say that yes, silence may well make the avoidant miss you, but it will probably only be in small amounts here and there, and unlikely to be enough to cause the avoidant to reach back out to you. Especially as the longer the silence goes on the more the avoidant will probably feel guilty and awkward and will fear anger and repercussions for reaching back to you.

Unless you had an especially strong connection with the avoidant and their feelings for you outweigh their fears, then they might miss you a bit more, perhaps enough to contact you. The stronger your connection, the more those moments of missing you will pop into the avoidants mind and challenge them.

rowanjthomas