8 Things You Should NEVER Say To Someone In Pain

Have you ever felt like you can never say the right thing when trying to comfort someone? It can be so hard to try to find a good balance of empathy, encouragement, and insight while sounding understanding. However, there are definitely some things that you shouldn’t say to someone who is hurting. Curious to know what to avoid when trying to comfort a person you care about? Here are some things you shouldn't say to someone in pain.

Writer: Lily Metrinko
Script Editor: Morgan Franz
Script Manager: Kelly Soong
VO: Amanda Silvera
Animator: Grace Cárdenas Cano
YouTube manager: Cindy Cheong

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[Psychgo]

Happy Tuesday everyone! Many of you emailed us asking what are ways to comfort a friend. We decided to make this video. Hopefully, it helps! Comment below things that you say to a friend who's hurting.

[malisawithab]

Other things:
"have I done something wrong?"
"You're stressing me"
"You just want attention"
"but you have everything"
"You're ignoring the good things"
"I had it worse"

[JustRaven]

“You’re overreacting”
“You’re acting like a child”/ “grow up”
“Get over it”
“It’s not even that big of a deal”

[RandomGoldieStuff]

"Calm down" has always felt like a personal attack

[hatvielehobbies]

"But there are children that cannot afford their food. "

Yes there are. Send them some money and let me hurt. It really does not help, someone hurting, to remind them how horrible our world is.

[ICEcoldJT]

“Speak to people in a way that if they died the next day, you’d be satisfied with the last thing you said to them.” 🙏🏽

[datboi]

Things not to say to someone in pain
1. It's not that bad... other people have it WORSE 0:53
2. Just stop worrying and let it go 1:21
3. It's not bothering anyone else 1:40
4. You don't need to feel this way 2:07
5. You are too sensitive 2:43
6. Calm down 3:03
7. You should be grateful for... 3:24
8. Chin up 3:54
I hope I could help! :D

[MeemahSN]

So many people just don’t get it. If someone’s in pain, listen to them, and don’t remove that current feeling

[HydroMedusae]

Or "you're just on your period it's not that big of a deal."
I hate when people tell me this

[WisdomWealth]

We cannot be dismissive. They need our love and support. 💞

[Min-Yujin]

I love how my dad has said basically every single one of these to me.

[FaizatheTempest]

"Just think positive."
Wow, *BRILLIANT* idea why didn't I think of that before 😑

[VerenaSatriani]

Sometimes the best thing we can do for them is listening and then give them a warm hug.. they need our ears and hearts.

[RaspberryV]

If my mom tells me to “cheer up” or “stop being so angry” or “calm down” one more time I’m just gonna stop talking to her about anything, I’m a teenager my hormones are going to be out of wack and I’m going to feel sad tired or angry for no reason sometimes for what seems like no reason. Tbh I feel like my mom is the cause of some of this, she plays a big part in my life and is making more of a negative impact on my life then I wish she would. I don’t think she know that she’s hurting me like this but she is. She won’t even respect my boundaries half the time “hey mom I don’t like it when people touch me can you stop forcing me to hug you?” And she just responds with “I’m not people I’m your mother” I don’t like being touched and I can’t just magically change that. Another thing she did unintentionally was say bisexuality isn’t real, and now I’m scared to come out of the closet. And the prefect cherry on top is school being stressful as hell because I’m in all advanced classes for some reason even though I suck at math and I’m only good at ELA. My mom is the person that’s going to leave a huge impact on my life but she’s just not takeing my feelings into account she asks why I’m sad or mad and I don’t know why I just am. I’m not in touch with my emotions I don’t know anything about myself and everyone is expecting me to and I’m just confused right now.

I’m sorry for the rant it’s just easier for me to talk online to people that don’t know me.

Edit: the replies are so nice thank you for all the advice

[michaelokeke]

Who else gets irritated when people say “It’s never that serious” or “It’s not that serious”? 👋 🙄
As soon as you say it to them, they get offended

[ChocoParfaitFra]

“Other people have it worse” is so unfair
It’s like you can’t feel what you feel because it’s not important enough

[veronicaredtzer]

"It's not bothering anyone else" hit close to home, my ex always compared me to his friends :(

[iquestionmyself]

I’m relapsing in anorexia and she said “this again🙄😒”

[joelp]

My parents: "YOU DONT NEED CONSULTATION, YOU ONLY CAN HELP YOURSELF"
ME: DEPRESSION, BIPOLAR, ADHD AND ANXIETY

[imhere]

Friend: You are too sensitive.
Me: You are a psychopathe.