I’m tired but can’t rest

I’m tired but can’t rest.

I’m wondering if it’s just because of the time of year… but deep down I know this has been a lifelong thing.

There’s a deep layer of my identity that is tied to productivity.

How much can I accomplish?

What else can I do?

How can I show those around me that I’m worthy of love and respect?

Let me be your dancing circus monkey and take care of everything and show you everything that I can accomplish so that you’ll loveeeee me.

There’s only so much one person can physically, emotionally and spiritually DO before they need to rest, regroup and recenter.

I’ve reached my max. And yet I cannot rest.

How do you get your mind on board so that you can ACTUALLY listen to your body and rest without guilt, judgment or shame?

How do you heal your relationship with productivity and separate your identity from how much you can “get done?”

How do you just BE?

How can you be content with that and let it be enough?

These are things I’m working though in this moment. Maybe you can relate?

If so, let us both remember that rest is a requirement for well being. Not a mother fucking reward for being productive or doing more than we can handle.

I see you. I hear you. I love you.

Ps. If you’ve been in this spot, and have learned how to rest without having your mind talk mountains of shit to you please share your wisdom with me. 🩵✨