Autistic Socialization Tips

As an autistic introvert who struggled with social anxiety until my early twenties and didn't learn social skills until college, I know socializing can be hard.
The good news? There are plenty of ways to counteract this anxiety! Here are a few tips. on how to make your social life a little better!

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[randytobien]

Good talk. Last week was listening to a great talk by an autistic person on how deadly small talk is for many on the spectrum. Replies in the comment section were brilliant! Most saw social interactions as creative interactions. Many feel drained and confused by "normal" conversations. No kidding! Aren't we all "dependent" on "inter-dependence" ? Don't we all thrive better in "quality" relations? For me, it is the honest connection I love, where-ever it takes me. Last couple of months the consistent themes I noticed were, people's fear of being seen as a " defect, not good enough, a failure" Over, and over, and over. Why do we block the road to our inherent inter-dependence?? There are many-y-y autistics who are better at empathy and social interactions than neuro-typicals . A phrase I read. "Autism . . .is it's own kind of normal" What else is there?? There is my "rant".

[sillysam]

I’m pretty sure I’m undiagnosed autistic, but growing up in the Middle East, this kind of stuff is shunned. I’ve always struggled but things esp got worse after I travelled to study abroad which I’m currently doing. I feel so bad for other students whenever they are forced to be in a group project with me because I literally go through a mental freedze out and stop talking, which I’m trying to overcome. I swear sometimes I literally become mute. Does anyone relate to this?

[shanesorensen]

The one piece of advice I could give is try to find like minded who have shared interests is often overlooked.

[Telonelemon]

Ive always loved autistic people. They are so genuine.

[gabe]

Hi as an autistic teenager struggling in the pandemic thank you so much for this. This saved my life

[BARN]

I struggled with depression through out all high school and didn't start making friends until I left because I went down self imrpovement and tried to do an identity shift into someone I want to be

[alecfromminnenowhere]

OMG, I am so much the same. I didn't know how to socialize until college either. It was amazing how a few books helped me so much. Also I plan social events ahead of time and think to myself what I'm going to say and not say. I also critique my interactions afterwards and think of ways to improve them. Wow, it's a relief that I'm not the only one. Thanks.

[bluming]

You can tell from the camera avoidance 🤧🥺❣️

[like]

I haven't made new friends in years. I want a new friend, but I just haven't been able to make any.

[GreenLad]

You are vey honest and open about autism. I really admire you. I believe that I am on the autistic spectrum.

[juliadesiree]

Wow, just by listening to you I realize that I probably am autistic.. I never thought about that because of a wrong idea about autism. But I can totally relate to a lot of things you are saying, thank you for doing this ❤ You said something like “When you don't feel like going, don't go“.. that's true, but I often get really stuck at this step.. trying to figure out if I feel like going or not. Often I feel like I want to go to a social event and at the the same time I don't want to go, so I spend a huge amount of time and energy to make a choice. It's draining. Does someone recognize this?

[zatara]

This is very helpful. You're good at putting words to a lot of the scripts/frameworks I didn't even realize I was doing

[MarieWilliams-tw]

I have ADHD and Autism I have learned it's best to keep it polite with people that I'm on friends with. I always had bad communication with people because I would try and make conversation with people. And get in people's way. People these days are too interested in themselves. And don't want to talk to people if they don't want to. Especially if they hardly know the person. And it's best to not always overshare because people don't really care if people are saying anything that is not in their interests. They might say Shut up or I don't care. But as soon as people say something that is in their interests like money or opportunities that they can get. A lot of people will push their luck and try and persuade us to give it to them. I have learned to always do what is sensible. Don't listen to people who try and make fun of us and say something scarcastic or play practical jokes on us.

[josueacunauwu]

This is so stupid. I AM so stupid. Why are there some people who just do it naturally, but it's hell for me and need to learn step by step what I have to do to be "normal"?

[raymondb]

Well put Jess! You have a great Xmas as well and don't feel rushed to hurry back. We'll be here for you when you feel you have new content to post :)

[ValerieHernandez-yemw]

I really appreciate your videos. I feel so alone.

[burgerhero]

I Just had to grapple myself to watch this afterwards after failing a social situation miserably at the doom near a receptionist.

[Uraim]

I talked with people other than my family was 2months ago ...

I have no friends (I have some but some of them feel like that im talking with random people) No topics whatsoever.

I also have brain damage, Parkingsons disease... I cant really talk with in my native language (Mostly i mix my native language with english, due i dont know the word that im trying to say, my native language is Hungary). Full mess.

Backstory: My dad not liked me, he discriminates aginst me, he just likes my big bro, i have got 10-12year of abuse at school, at home i got yelled at all the time. My mom needed expensive medicine to make me, she was 35at the time i was born, it was very late for her. Something may happened with me that i cannot function properly. Im not able to make friends, no one helps. When i told my mom about that i cant able to do that, she just laughed and she told me that im normal. So we did not went to doctor to identify that. I can identify the Parkingsons disease, due i see things very frequently that is not there, and after like a few second it does disappear (Halucination). And about the brain damage: sometimes i dont know who i am, or my bro name (Real story, my mom got an android phone for a first time and she dont really know what do things, and he wanted to add my big bro to her friend list, and my dumb frick brain didnt know what is my big bro name), or someone name, that is very close to me. I forget it and i dont know.

[Epic-soek]

hi I just wanna say that it's really cool to see someone similar to me in how you think about goals and "frameworks" and stuff like that. This was a good video! Helped me a lot!

[ohzirri]

Yes, having a plan is def something I noticed helps!