Twelve Signs of a Sadistic Partner: Unmasking a Malignant Narcissist

Sadism is characterised by having a desire to inflict pain and misery on others for pleasure or to control and dominate. Alongside psychopathy, narcissism and Machiavellianism, sadism is the fourth part of The Dark Tetrad.

Through examples and insights this video outlines looks at the key characteristics of sadistic side of the dark personality, and how a sadistic narcissist operates within a relationship, their manipulation techniques, gaslighting, parental alienation and abuse. Looking also a their dark empathy, enjoyment of others' suffering, and insatiable thirst for power and control at any cost.

00:00 Intro
01:35 Signs of a sadistic partner
11:15 Conclusion

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#sadisticnarcissist #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissistic

[nrika]

A sadistic malignant narcissist will keep asking questions to you about a hurtful situation you happen to find yourself in once they pick up on your suffering. They will listen contentedly as you explain what causes you pain. If you naively and inadvertently give out information to them, they will keep coming back for more. Beware!

[KA-mqwj]

Very good video. My ex narcissistic husband of 20 years had all 12 of these signs and more. He was truly a sadist. I was so depressed from all the abuse and trauma I was hospitalized many times. He wanted me to die of suicide. These sick people will murder your soul. It’s taken me years to recover. Get out!! and protect your kids, pets too.

[matilda]

"constant barrage of malice" sums it up well

[izawaniek]

This is exactly what sadists do. Sadism manifests in the ways you have described. I have experienced many of them. Evil is driving those cruel people.

[MM-zsrp]

I swear this fits my ex - I’ll never forget him texting me while I was in the ER for kidney stones asking when I would take the kids back because he has things to do. Or when he yelled at me for bothering him while I was having a miscarriage and asked him to drive me to the hospital because I passed out from pain. Other people don’t even seem to be seen as human by him when it conflicts with his wants

[chelleb]

I grew up the youngest in a family of extroverted sadistic/sociopathic narcissists. I can't even begin to describe how damaged I was as a kind hearted introvert until I finally went no contact and got the proper help I needed to begin to heal. It's like growing up with actual demons.

[danishrover]

You just described my ex-wife to the teeth. Thought she was a covert narc but this is more like her. She would like to starte and argument just for the "fun" of it and wake me up in the middle of the night because she had an issue. And she made sure that every time I wanted to spend time outside the home I was told that I was ego centric and didn't love the family and her. The smirk and the black eyes are the things that really mess with your mind. Never again.

[vidarignault]

You have just perfectly described my husband of 58 years!! It is as though you you knew him intimately!! I have been a widow now for 3 1/2 years and couldn’t be happier!! The only thing I could add to all you said would be that his narcissism became steadily worse and more vindictive with age!!

[lindseyw]

I looked after my mother for 16 years after my father died. Visiting her every Saturday in that time, when she became demented slightly more regularly. I worked 80 miles away full time and lived 40 miles in the other direction away from her. 3 months after she died my narcissistic husband and my 2 manipulative children sat me down and tore strips off me for still grieving for her and that I needed help. Cruelty like none other.

[vantom]

"Insults disguised as jokes." Thanks for hitting that nail on the head. This is something covert about my brother that I have struggled to explain to even counselors. My brother also fits multiple other signs like enjoying others' misfortune, including laughing about pets dying, and public humiliation and drawing attention to people's failures. And constantly seeming like he wants some kind of argument and then to derail and dominate it. It's not about the argument or topic but just finding someone to tussle with without admitting it. And yes, there is a constant sense of intensification to his toxicity over time. I'm really avoiding and minimising contact as much as possible and it feels like fighting/flighting for my life!

[cp]

It's like you lived in the house with myself and my now deceased 2nd husband. I'm so glad for your education and others. You literally saved my life.

[JUMPforyourLIFE]

Being in a toxic relationship and with a suspected NRC or BPD partner, could actually be one of the great moments of your life, in such a way that if you are ready, and are not particularly inclined to create a victim identity for yourself, you may actually be able to recreate yourself and find a measure of self love that before hand might have taken many years to figure out. That is if the NRC doesn’t off you first, because you are their property, in their eyes and from their supreme sense of entitlement, even if it is not at all true. I hope everyone who reads this understands how much danger you are in by keeping these toxic covert poisonous people around. Save yourself.

[ianarn]

My ex girlfriend almost out of the blue one day said “how can i punish you” i thought she was joking and didn’t take it seriously as she seemed fun and playful other than a previous silent treatment. I mentioned the Caroline Flack lamping event as an example of what not to do. I didn’t think anything mor of it apart from when she occasionally pushed me really hard when i was asleep. After refusing a baby request after only 10 months of pretty unstable dating where i was constantly triangulated with other men she kicked me incredibly hard in the backside when i was asleep. The next evening we had an argument and she said “if you go that’s the last time your coming back here”. I quickly exited as i didn’t trust sleeping there another night so her control tactics ultimately back fired on her. The first night i was actually with her she bit my lips really hard and sadistically there was nothing playful about it. I guess she was testing how much abuse I’m could withstand for later. It was the kind of bite that I hadn’t had since a toddler bit me when i was a little kid in the sandpit. I imagine this is congruent with narcissists only having the emotional development of a 3 year old despite being a chronological adult in their 30s with a mature intellect and body.

[daedalusjones]

These videos have enabled me to for the fist time recognize (and name) the full extent of what she did to me. I’ve stayed alone ever since, out of fear, for decades.

[MoPoppins]

I could have benefited from knowing EVERYTHING in this video as a toddler—anyone who’s not a narc, and is exposed to narcs (isn’t that most people?), should know ALL the info in this video, so they’ll understand what’s happening, and that they can never do anything to change it (other than quietly sneak away).

[karenk]

I lived with this for decades, and it accelerated especially after retirement and children leaving (no witnesses) ... until I fled for my life.

[JudeMichaelPeterson]

Reminds me a lot of my father. I remember that glint of pleasure in his eyes when he'd watch people, especially me, in pain. Disrespect for people and their property was his way. And the denial when he got caught breaking things or hurting children.

[yvetteandjorgenlarsen]

Dear Darren, because you took the time to explain the elements of the dark tetrad here, I now know that my soon to be ex-husband is definitely a dark tetrad covert narcissist. This certainty really, really helps me because I no longer blame or doubt myself, and I can now understand why he was so very mean and hateful, without the slightest concern for my welfare or feelings. I endured a harrowing few months of marriage, and barely made it out alive! He made fun of ne during my very difficult time in the hospital, even the fact that they couldn't diagnose the illness for over 2 months. The new knowledge you've imparted here makes me just that much more relieved to have been kicked out and to be far, far away, no contact except through the attorney who has filed our court case. (He seems to be a perfect gentleman, but it probably doesn't hurt that my daughter works for a judge in his state.) God bless you, Darren!

[scottwwsi]

I was entangled for 1-1/2 years....the worse encounter I've ever had.

[GordonPavilion]

Parental Alienation really IS a thing, and you are correct, the act of alienation can, and often does, start long before a separation takes place.