Will The Dismissive Avoidant Come Back After No Contact? | Dismissive Avoidant Relationship

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Advanced Dismissive Avoidant Attachment Style Course: Your Guide to Thrive in the 6 Stages of a Relationship

In this video, we discuss why the dismissive avoidant sometimes will come back after no contact. We'll explore how they react to no contact and the situations that make them want to reach out again.

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I’m Thais Gibson, welcome to my channel, and thank you for stopping by!

This is a channel designed for you, to be used as a resource to create lasting transformation in your personal and professional life. Here you’ll receive an ongoing series of personal development and spiritual growth videos for you to expand your awareness and find resolution and deep understanding within.

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#NoContact #DismissiveAvoidant #DismissiveAvoidantAttachment #PersonalDevelopmentSchool #ThaisGibson #AttachmentStylesAndRelationships #UnderstandingYourPartner #AttachmentStyles #DismissiveRelationship #DismissivePartner

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[MIMIDSH]

Worst experience in my life- dating a DA. It was soul crushing. And heartbreaking because we could have been a great couple. If only.

[Oh_Nana]

Please save yourselves from engaging in relationships with anyone who has dismissive avoidant traits. Love yourself more. Choose yourself. It’s better to be alone than to be with someone and still feel alone. It’s better to be alone than to long for someone who cannot and will not reciprocate your affections in a way that makes you feel valued. Please just leave these kinds of people alone.

[AlphonseSchwenke]

The problem with DA is that they blame you for it and don't take responsibility for their actions.

[MrBigoncia]

Honestly I gave it up. The "I don't need anybody" mantra is hardwired in that brain

[ST-fpfg]

I am a healthy happy secure person. Years of my life. Cheating, lies, disappearing, left me in an emotional rock bottom state alone. Letting a DA in, will destroy your life. Run

[GazaFloatilla]

😅 my experience with a dismissive avoidant was so incredibly illuminating in terms of who I am. She showed me so much in such a rapid fashion. She was the best and worst of who I am. Feeding my ego, pulling away in such a sudden and childish way, creating a monster out of me in such an undeserving but stereotypical way. And I am dynamic enough to have suffered so massively, but surge into a new form of myself, I've changed. I am better through the pain, and now I can go back to respecting her and loving her without ever wanting her to come back, though she may. I need to be stronger better faster.
We are made more powerful in having our weakenesses exposed by dismissive avoidants. Take the power they show you from the weaknesses they have drawn from the darkest part of your soul

Get lit fam

[leighd]

DA's need to be in therapy - point blank. Other attachment types can heal and get slowly better with incremental changes, but extreme Avoidants just create havoc and destroy relationships stringing people along creating more chains of pain, hurt people hurt people. If they have kids, they avoid them too and don't give their kids affection, and dismiss their emotions. They aren't there emotionally for their kids either - perpetuating the cycle of dysfunctional attachment!! Then that kid becomes the same!
If you know you have DA attachment, you should NOT get into a relationship without working on yourself, going to therapy, and healing as well as being UPFRONT with any partners about where you are. DA's love bomb like they are secure early on when there is less to lose, and then months later BOOM, all of a sudden they are nowhere to be found, can't meet a partner's needs, and then run away every time you mention even the calmest thing about it. Then they act like the other partner is asking for too much! It's like Jekkyl & Hyde, they transform! It's an absolute predatory spider web TRAP for Anxious Attachers, and Secure people GTFO and run because they smell the danger! It's toxic and gaslighting! When really, they haven't done the work on themselves and are just recklessly breaking people's worlds apart, breaking hearts, and then going off to sulk about it alone until they come back out and repeat the behavior again.

Avoidants get SO upset because they get such a bad reputation, but it's like YOU KNOW WHY, because none of ya'll are actually healing yourselves! There are SO many walking around not doing anything about it! The divorce pool and dating pool is FULL of Avoidants! They are all over dating websites. The secure people already got snatched up. If you DA's don't want that bad reputation, then be the change you want to see! Heal yourself DA's. Then go talk about how you healed and have better relationships and teach other DA's how to do it too! ‼

[howtosober]

The only reason I want any DA coming back around is to give me the epic amends they owe me for how they treated me- especially on their way out. Second chances to these types is just signing on for more of the same after you already depleted yourself doing ALL the work of the relationship the first time. Going 'no contact' was for me to take back all the energy and investment I wasted on the DA and become clear on who they really are instead of chasing the highs of the few times they actually showed up as a partner. And, since I know they will never bother hearing or empathizing with anything I tried to say, it's the loudest statement I could make that they crossed the final line with me.

[Revolution-tlwo]

Matthew Hussey says it best: "You have your reasons, but I have my reality [experience]. And what *I'M* interested in is my reality [experience]." In other words, who gives a f**k about the DA's reasons. It's useful to understand and process what you went through with the DA, but it doesn't excuse the behavior. Being constantly dismissed, invalidated, and used is a reality I don't have time for any longer. DA's can work their stuff out alone or with someone willing to put up with it.

[MellowBellow]

One of the most important insecure attachment messages:

Our feelings are telling us something, but not about the thing we THINK it is. Not about the person in front of us. Not the attachment figure. The feelings are telling you something about YOU.

[jodieneal]

I'm just discovering I'm a DA....at 51. I finally met a secure man who tried so hard to love me...truly and unconditionally. He taught me about boundaries and safe spaces and being vulnerable. I didn't get it until it was too late. Now I'm working hard to heal myself and getting therapy. I see clearly now and know I can change 🙏

[Truncali]

I consider myself a fearful avoidant. I've experience two DA relationships where they pulled away and instead of being able to wait for them for a month I blocked them and resolved to never let them back. Seemed like the only way to protect myself from a repeat. I just wanted to move on and find the girl who doesn't need to walk all over me to prove to herself that she isn't being controlled and randomly abandon me when ever her fears get the best of her. Thats all just too painfull for me to allow myself to go through more than once.

[lavitadilaura]

just to talk about my own experience. i was with my DA ex for about a year. we fell in love and got into a relationship very fast. he broke up with me because we were fighting a lot. I couldn't cope with his DA behaviors (I'm anxiously attached). I only texted him twice after the breakup, he wasn't interested in talking about anything. 4 months after the breakup he called me once. 10 months after the breakup he started to try to get in touch again. texting me, calling me. when we made plans to meet he often canceled spontaneously. it lead to nothing. it was disappointing but it's okay. the thing is, he didn't work on himself. he still doesn't know what he wants so this time I broke off contact. it's not worth it.

[CommandoMaster]

No contact could work on a DA if they just need a bit of space/time to themselves, so they make up a reason to leave u temporarily. But the problem is that DAs can move on pretty easily, since they don't get emotionally attached to anybody, so another person could easily replace u in their mind.

[lianavibes]

This is really great Thais. If a DA is willing to do the work, heal their insecure attachment, they become very healthy to intimately bond with. However, I also find if they are staunchly disagreeable—and accompanied with highly Narcisstic personality traits—it’s best to avoid them.

[improseen]

After 7 months of confusion with this girl im seeing, these videos are kind of bringing Me closure. She’s for sure avoidant. Even though we share so many intimate moments, it seems like we are taking the smallest steps possible forward if any at all. That’s what confuses me. I can feel the love between us, but it’s like we pretend it’s not there and we ignore it. I’m tired of ignoring how I feel for her. It makes me insecure and think I’m not good enough, or that she’s really seeing someone else.

[edenevermore]

I’m about to go no contact because I just can’t keep doing this shut down/out, can’t communicate, unwillingness to accept and work on themselves cycle. I’m a healthy person to be in a relationship and I hate to say this but his coldness eventually drove me to relapse after 6 years of recovery. I guess it triggered the heck outta me. I’m sober now and we are still having the same issues, I have been focusing on myself and becoming a better, more whole, healing person. However, I feel I’m growing apart from him, like he’s still stuck back there in the mud. No matter what I attempt to gently suggest, or show him methods of how I’ve been working on myself…he just calls me crazy and completely shuts me out. This used to bother me, but now, I’m aware of his way of processing and I just go about focusing back on myself. If he is truly happy with the way he functions in the world…so be it. But I no longer allow it trigger me. I come from a place of understanding, which makes this next decision very difficult because I do love him, but I MUST start living for me and stop living for someone else. I do not desire a relationship like the one I have with the unhealed DA. I desire mutual respect, honor, loyalty, healthy communication, healthy conflict, being direct, physical touch, and much more….but not what I am getting from the unhealed DA. It just hurts too much…the constant rejection, neglect, disregard, abandonment, walking on eggshells…it’s not worth my soberiety, I hate to say this, but the juice is not worth the squeeze. 😢

[konvict]

Thats the thing though, DA's dont like to have indepth intellectual conversations. Theres no talking to these people! Anything that sounds like a "heart to heart" will trigger their coward behavior and theyll go stick their head in the sand again.

[TheCupcakeicecream]

I sometimes feel my ex only started wanting and even respecting me after I went no contact and left for good.

[mathews]

If i was about to buy a house with someone and they disappeared for 4-12 weeks, that would be the end of the relationship