Why You're So Awkward And Never Have Anything To Say

Tips for having small talk and getting into deep conversation.

#socialanxiety #smalltalk #sociallyawkward

𝙎𝙤𝙘𝙞𝙖𝙡𝙨

Intro: 0:00
The Approach: 1:08
Extra: 3:24
Small Talk: 4:50
Getting Deep: 9:19
An Important Note: 11:22

𝙈𝙮 𝙂𝙚𝙖𝙧

𝘼𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩
Hey, I'm Cole Hastings. I'm a vegan athlete/content creator with a passion for videography/video editing, among other things. I try to help people through sharing my experiences and evolution through life.

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[wander]

Honestly, my awkward/ shy/ nervous/ anxiety self is ruining my own life… it’s sad and when I think about it more it just makes it worse.

[marioncarbonell]

I've always felt like one-on-one conversations end up being more profound because you actually get to know the person more in depth.

[DemetriPanici]

*“It’s time you realized that you have something in you more powerful and miraculous than the things that affect you and make you dance like a puppet.” – Marcus Aurelius*

[ashleykathryn]

I can start conversations pretty easily, my problem is leaving the small talk. I get stressed trying to find a topic to branch off to. I keep trying though! It's definitely a skill that has to be built

[michaelfeddema]

All you have to do is really genuinely care about every word the other person is saying. Focussing on their words and the meaning behind those words will keep you out of your own head. Never think about what you are going to say and never hesitate with saying what comes to mind. Everyone has the natural ability to converse together, really care about the other person when you are talking with them

[kimaya.]

i got small talk going, but my conversations never get deeper, im like that person in class who everyone talks to, but nobody hangs out with because I have nothing interesting to say

[germangdll]

Someone recently gave me the same advice and they phrased it in a way I found really powerful: letting fear 'wash over you'. accept that there is no immediate way to rid yourself of that fear other than to experience it BUT by letting go of resistance towards that fear you discover some new kind of resilience within yourself.

[BrunoRibeiroComboios]

I can totally relate to what you said in this video. I’m always anxious about social interactions because I feel that nothing on my life is really interesting to other people. As a result, what usually happens is others sharing a lot and I don’t share that much. I remember that my friends in school saying “Your are always quiet, you dont say anything. Say something” but I honestly did not know what to say. I was able to improve since then, but I still struggle with social interactions now with 23 years-old. I try to focus on the other person and ask questions about them, but eventually I ran out of things to ask and I dont want it to feel like an interrogation. But your content has been helping a lot, I wish I found your channel earlier. Thanks a lot!

[marioww]

Thank you Seriously thank you.
I'm 23 and been struggling with this for a while and felt like giving up with relationship. On top of that, I never knew how to explain this to others so some people thought I was faking and just hated others. Now I feel empowered to give it another go. I'm showing this video to my parents and relatives so they get what I'm been trying to convey.

[ELP]

My thing is at work. Ppl CONTINOUSLY ask me what I'm doing on the weekends, and I always feel like my weekends plans are never are interesting as theirs. And it's the constant comparison that makes my social anxiety worst

[bram]

I’ve been diagnosed with Autism and try to communicate better (people w/ autism are often socially more awkward) but still the things you say really could be helpful! Thank u Cole🙏🏻

[xpertaab]

Even when I actually want to talk to someone and feel comfortable, I still don't know what to say. Mind is completely blank

[kertkoljada]

I'm actually very confident and happy about myself when I imagine the conversation, but right when I begin to talk, I stutter and fail

[sarahbarnett]

This guy knows how it feels to be carrying old trauma around. It fucking sucks and you isolate yourself out of fear of rejection and negative things happening again. Thank you for this video, you helped me a lot.

[del_fino]

how you handle rejection will reveal aspects of your character. turn that L into a learned lesson. keep improving homies! 🤙🏼

[slasher]

I think I've gotten fired from like 10 jobs this year because of my awkwardness. Which is now turning into anxiety because I can barely afford rent despite being the hardest worker at many places. I'm hoping this video helps. Thanks again Cole.

[valerianotval]

My loophole for getting over awkwardness was viewing the inability to tolerate it as weakness. I’ve always hated weakness, and never wanted to be perceived as weak. As such, it was a point of pride for me to be able to tolerate awkwardness longer than anyone else, even if no one else thought of it that way.

Of course, if you don’t mind being weak this doesn’t really help you…😬

[tos]

Cole, i gotta say out of all the advice channels out there your content is the most consistent, relatable, effective, and digestible that I’ve seen. Keep up the great work

[MrRocksW]

I am 29 now, when I was 18-24 I used to be extremely shy. Tbh it is a cliche but I did grow out of it. It was not pleasant at the time and I am sympathetic to people going through it.

[IsaacJoshi]

The fact that you are watching this video means you are at least part of the way to creating a better life for yourself. All your regrets are in the past, this is your oppurtunity to make the decision to start creating for yourself the life that you want!

Good luck friend!