The Science Of Why You're So Awkward

yo

also here's my sources:

i also reference figures from Ty Tashiro's book “awkward: the science of why we’re socially awkward and why that's awesome”

[this.science]

Sorry if I sound like a 40 year old smoker who really needs to clear their throat. I was sick when recording🤠🤠

[Goon_Lagoon]

Awkwardness being labeled as “social inconsistency” was prolly the coolest thing I heard in this video

[andrey.skripnik]

i genuinely wish every piece of knowledge i hear or see throughout my life were presented in this exact form

[SoRaKe]

im not awkward, they are, imagine saying im awkward because i suggested we use the checkered floor to play chess, and use ourselves as chess pieces

[BlackDragon-tfrv]

The last advice, "Don't think what you're going to say. Just try to be interested" is the best advice you can ever get.

[EchterAlsFake]

Don't take life so serious.

A smile on your face always helps.

[Ariste_]

As an ex awkward person myself, i can confidently claim that exposure is the best way. Just a few months ago i moved to another city, where i knew absolutely no one, for high school. Not first grade but third so everyone had their groups. I remember how anxious i was the first few weeks, but still, i did everything i can to talk to people about things - little, meaningless things cuz appearently thats how small talk works- felt like hell but then i began to realize its not as hard as i thought, people are not really that judgy, they share experiences with me and they genuinely don’t care about the things that make me insecure. Now im almost a social butterfly in just a few months! So try to get out of you comfort zone as soon as you can, it will not be easy at all but will worth it!

[jamueI]

Tip: do not think about how much eye contact you're making while talking with people, that's only gonna make you nervous, and then awkward

[elokin]

Alternatively, you could reduce your social contact so much to the point the anxiety loops back around to being confident because you don’t even remember why you were afraid of people anymore

[vanta]

my social-extroverted sister always tells me that if you expose yourself to uncomfortable situations, you get used to it. but that's the problem 😭 I despise awkward situations... so I avoid people altogether 💀

[ava]

Ok so for all those awkward ppl out there (and this is coming from someone that was/occasionally is still awkward), I found that I was super anxious and worried sm abt those awkward silences more than actually knowing how to continue a conversation. I got my first job in 2021, started off by not talking to anyone, and then slowly got more comfortable with my coworkers and just took a risk and started talking. Ended up becoming friends with everyone, became really social and talkative, learned how to continue conversations and keep eye contact, etc, etc.
I think the best advice I can give to those who have paralyzing social anxiety is to just breathe and embrace it. Live in the moment and enjoy the conversation, and force yourself out of your comfort zone (as hard as it is). I feel sm better now knowing I can at least fake confidence even if I’m feeling super awkward.

[miguelangelsb_]

What has really worked for me over the years has been to just be honest and say to the other person: "I'm really nervous", or "I'm not sure what to do with my hands right now" for example, and always with a laughing or similing tone. Everyone can relate to being awkward, and it can help you a lot to break the ice. Being honest about your vulnerabilities and immediate feelings in turn makes others more comfortable being with you, in my experience.

[handsoapjack]

Im not socially awkward or struggle in social settings, but this is still good advice to keep in mind when talking to people.

[existentialbowlofnoodles]

It’s best not to overthink how to not look awkward. The best and only relevant advice is to first be confident which is its own complex issue and secondly understand social cues. When it comes to social cues it’s virtually impossible to achieve social fluency by consciously implementing “tactics”, this will lead only to even more awkwardness alongside a debilitating serving of social anxiety, believe me I’ve been there. Truly socially adept people are never stuck in their own head about how others around them are perceiving them, they are present and in tune with those they are conversing with rather than trying to control how they are seen. Now if your not naturally receptive of the necessary cues your either one of two things, severely autistic or lacking in consistent exposure to social environments, the latter is more probable. Best thing you can do is be around more people daily to train your subconscious mind to do the work for you so your conscious mind has room to spare for engaging the complexities presented in the mutual topic at hand. Social interaction is far too complicated to try and control, you must develop the power of your social intuition through the reluctant means of exposure if you ever want to attain charisma.

[guikentaro]

I can assure you that exposure really helps against anxiety! You just gotta remember people really don't care about you and the more you socialize, less anxious you'll be!

[Frog_Wizard]

Me: “My autism can me feel really awkward in social situations, I’m gonna watch this video and see if there might be a solution”

Video:” one way of measuring awkwardness is by using an autism test”

Me: “welp, guess I’ll die”

[Brambrew]

I'm not awkward but I do frequently remember awkward things I said and did.
My brain serves me embarrassing memories on a platter and I cringe with every bite.

[alexandrud]

OMG, you condense valuable information into a short time and explain it in a non-boring, fun and simple way that anyone can understand. What a great discovery 👏

[KlearlyJonas]

You are a big motivation for me - you prove that you can make it from zero to hero in literally months. Keep up the great work dude

[kaelanmcquerry]

Im curiously uncomfortable to be around so this is perfect for me. I decided to help with this to go to a club on my birthday, by myself, I didn't drink, and I just danced. Stood in the middle of the crowd and just moved with those funky beats. Didn't go out with the expectation of meeting anyone. I went home alone but it was the best feeling. I highly suggest this to anyone and everyone (sorry teenagers, you cant) Im in know way "better" but now im a little more comfortable in my skin, and I can tell that in my everyday interactions with people.