A Narcissist wants to control You

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Tune in to hear the perspective of a self aware narcissist. That’s me - Ben Taylor a narcissist in recovery trying to promote awareness, healing, growth and change. I do that by these videos on here, TikTok, Instagram and Facebook.

Platforms I am on:

[JJ-widx]

This is scary accurate, especially how they micromanage your time and relationships until they are the epicenter of your life. Then they have you until they are done with you. I didn’t know what it was until after the fact. Glad you are raising awareness and offering perspective.

[Thankful]

My ex narc wanted to reconcile and he straight up said, “ I’m going to have my own life though. It’s not going to look like what we used to do. I’m going to go and do what I want, when I want, and where I want to do it. It’s my life and I want to enjoy my life to the fullest. I’ll be happier that way.”
🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
I was shocked and basically had to tell him, like okay dude, you do you!! but that is not happening for me! You want your cake and eat it too! Nope!!
His response… “Your expectations are way too high. That’s a bar I can’t reach!” Gaslighting and whining about being a victim of my expectations 🤣

‘Wait, Whaaat?? My expectations??
Let me get this straight, … you freely galavant and stay a bachelor?? 🤣😂Thanks for being honest!
Thanks for the heads up!!
C-Ya!! Buh-BYE! Adios!
Reconciliation ain’t happening!!’

Massive Ego Arrogance ! 🤮
Makes me sick!

[beverlytaylor]

It's like floating in space between two places, the narcissistic nightmare's fake love, or freedom and peace - and not belonging to either.

[stevehartwell]

Yes, dominant is a way to protect their false self and protect the inner shame. Makes sense.

[cherrybacon]

I never realised what he was actually doing until I started saying "No" and saw the reaction on his face. 🍒

[nicolasenikxy]

Yes! My ex would say things to me and I thought it was just him noticing and being on my side but it was actually putting doubts in my head about other people and I found myself distancing from the people. He would subtly ask who text me ‘at this time of night’ or if I was in the loo too long he’d ask where I’ve been or what have I been doing but at the time I didn’t think nothing to it. We were together 18 years and I know I’m trauma bonded cos I hurt a lot. He would never apologise unless he knew he could get something out of it. He blamed me for everything but yet told me I never take blame. He won’t take accountability for anything! He thinks he’s perfect yet tells me that I think I’m perfect. I see from videos etc that narcs can cry and show remorse even if they’re pretending but my ex would never do any of that. It’s like he’s different and worse then a narc. He’s so emotionally unavailable. I knew nothing about narcissism until we split and I spoke to a therapist who specialises in narcissism. I was in denial for months that he had been faking loving me for all those years but the timing of the discard pretty much confirms how fake he was. He’s also said so many hurtful things to me and I’ve never had anything like that happen to me before being with him. He did pretend to like everything I did at the beginning of the relationship so I thought we had so much in common but it was all fake cos years later he told me he didn’t like them and just did cos I did.
He throws anything and everything he’s done for me in my face anytime we argue. We still have contact a lot. Sometimes we speak ok but I now start to blow my top really easily which I never did before. It’s like he’s changed me into a different person!

[lpeacelovefaith]

My ex was controlling but his control changed over the years. Tried to put up a camera at my home and when I sad no he accused me of cheating. Then he started doing things to make me question what he was doing, I think on purpose, and I started to question him about things, I felt like I had changed into the person he was. I was insecure when I never ever had been before… it was so ugly.

[monalabelle]

Great message. Just simple dinner out is held over me, the help of changing my daughters tires is held over me. It's sick.

[shade]

Happened to me how we both like photography and i got off work and asked if she would take a photo of me with my film camera. This was a bid for connection on my part and spontaneous. She sneared and said, "i dont want to take a photo of you in here after work; i dont like the setting and it'd be a waste of a shot on the film." I told her calmly it's my camera though and im aware of the conditions and thats why i asked her. And that fell on deaf ears pretty much. Like, this is a small example but she still doesnt do this because *she wants control of this issue. Imagine if a person or couple asked her to take their photo and she replied like that. It's like, yeah we want you to take a spontaneous photo of us on our phone, dont worry its not a waste.

[Nomadic-safi]

Yes they do everything you said ...they like to isolate others to increase their control ...snd if you ask for your freedom they accuses you of control...do you believe this😢

[nc]

This video describes how and Why they r controlling but I really want to know why they seek control or dominance. Pls do a video on this