The Narcissistic Wife’s Playbook: 10 Ways She Treats Her Husband! | NPD | Narcissism

The Narcissistic Wife’s Playbook: 10 Ways She Treats Her Husband! | NPD | Narcissism | Behind The Science

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If you're attracted to this video, chances are, you might be going through a tough time with someone who is controlling and manipulative. You might feel lost and confused, unable to trust your own thoughts and feelings. We are here to support you.

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Narcissistic Personality Disorder

[johnkauppi]

I was married to a wife like this and I used to think, 'what is wrong with this woman'? The words 'sorry, please and thank you' never passed her lips. Boy, did I suffer. She destroyed my faith in women. They can be so charming and friendly with the love bombing. Then once a man is in love with them, they show their true self.

[Platttraining]

29 years of marriage with a quiet narcissist was death by a thousand cuts. Financial control, gaslighting, master of blame-shifting and the queen-servant dynamic knocked my psyche and self image to my knees. I divorced her, left the state & 7 years later I'm removing her emotional wreckage from my head. Great video and so needed!!

[davidtaplin]

I was married to the woman you described in your video . She threatened me with divorce I said don’t you threaten me with happiness! I’m divorced and happy 😃

[jcnlaw]

Experienced divorce attorney here (PA and NJ). Get educated BEFORE marriage. If you get a whiff of narcissistic personality disorder from your partner, RUN. The divorce will be brutal. You can thank me later.

[peterflynn]

That accurately describes all the tactics used by my ex-wife. In the later years she repeated many times "you don't make me happy; I want a divorce". She withdrew all intimacy and constantly created fights. After 14 years I walked away. My wife was in complete shock, believing she had total control of me. My two kids do not communicate with me even though 30 years have passed. I have grandchildren I have never met. My ex-wife is that vindictive and full of malice. Marrying her was the biggest mistake of my life, but I had the sense to leave. I have had peace of mind for 30 years although I miss my "kids", now middle aged.

[charleswatts]

18 years of pain and anguish. All 10 points on point. Just quietly pack and go. No... RUN!!!

[georgesontag]

A young man getting married will not believe his wife will turn into this. But some do, and divorce is on its way.

[johnnytoronto]

As a survivor, here's what I think after watching many, many videos on Narcissism.
Videos that describe their behaviour are fine but they describe what you have already experienced.
Those that detail how the narcissist works are also OK, but they hardly help rescue anyone.
Videos that help survivors recover are also OK, but once again they come after the fact.
Videos that tell how to identify a narcissist are also OK, but you don't know what you've got until
you're already in the trauma bond, or you've been discarded, or even until many years after you've
left the situation. See what I mean?
What the world really, really needs is a way to keep these monsters out of our lives altogether.
We need to teach our youngsters not how to identify or to endure, but how to REPEL them from the start.
Now, the narcissist's fish is caught in the love bomb stage, so we need to resist the tactics of the love bomb.
If we can do that the narcissist will leave us alone.
In other words, we become trapped by our own lust. Does anyone out there agree with me on this?
I may be a bit old fashioned but I admit and confess that if I had remained pure,
resisting my Narc's seductive behaviour at the get-go, none of the disasters that hit me over the
ensuing years would have happened. Just thinking out loud here. Your thoughts?

[robertjohnston]

You are not alone
Many of us get trapped with the love bomb and learn too late we have been ensnared.
We wish we knew before what we know now.
The important things to remember:
1 Get away from her and stay away. Do it asap. Your health is at stake
2 God wants you to be happy. She will get her karma
3 when dating keep a good lookout for red flags and if in doubt, backout
4 Do not marry again. You can get wiped out once and recover, not twice.
5 Second marriages fail more often than first ones.
6 Don’t worry about your vows. Don’t worry about the kids. Get a divorce asap
7 If you don’t worry about yourself, nobody will. Love yourself and be grateful for your health and your freedom
Best of luck friend.

[jds]

I am 59 years old and only know have I figured out that my mother was / still is a narcissist. I look back at my life and now see that the "family" meetings that we had were only for her to rage against my dad and my sisters and myself that we were not doing everything perfect for her and praising her. She could do no wrong. Now I understand why my dad had an affair and they divorced. She can never take blame for anything going wrong. I made the mistake of sending her a letter once about things that she did to me as a child and as an adult. Of course she blew it all out of proportion and she played the victim which I know see that she always does. I had a very close person friend of mine pass away unexpectedly. She showed me zero empathy, yet she likes to say that she loves me with all of her heart. she has absolutely no clue as to what she is talking about.

[DHW]

I feel so sorry for our father, the horrors to which he was subjected by our mother. It's insane all that she projected and provoked, blaming Dad and all us kids for her own perceived failures in life. It tears at my heart to hear a family member say, "I hope Mom's not in Hell, but...." And it tears at my heart equally to know their sentiments are justified. She was easily the most difficult person I've ever known.

[BigNope]

1:00 gaslighting and self blame
1:43 lack of support and constant opposition
2:34 intimacy manipulation
3:13 isolation and alienation from support
4:07 undermining your worth
4:49 projection of past traumas
5:29 Queen/servant dynamic
6:11 master of blame shifting
7:00 emotional absence
7:39 persistent threats of divorce

[gregorycarlson]

I am a Professional who has dealt with these matters for over 30 years. It is a myth that all men who cheat do so because of a pretty face or a nice body. I have learned that most men cheat for the same reasons women do. They need to hear words of love and encouragement and a sense of value from a woman. They need a woman who lifts them up, not one who knocks them down. Unfortunately, very few women know this, and drive their man into the arms of another woman.

[garygiff]

Just went through all this. The peace i now have is incredible after 28 years.

[joelandrum]

I'm still married to my narcissist, after 34 years. I have experienced much of what you say and, along the way, found methods of dealing with it.
The big one to me... Opposition to whatever is said. I forget, over and over, and express an opinion or observation only to be opposed. You don't really hold conversations with a narcissist - you just sort of grapple with them, trying (and failing) to find a position they are comfortable with.
Others:
The "blame game" is not too bad; she demanded a divorce and I readily agreed - that never came up again; she tried to wrest full control of finances, but has given up.
You can actually work through a lot of this if you want to. I won't travel with her anymore and am careful where I go with her, but all-in-all I like my life. I am 78.

[michaelc.]

spent the last forty years living this way never knowing where to place the blame Daaa! I never even heard the word narcissist until just recently. What a life!

[chrissanchez]

I was in a narcissistic relationship for 42 years without realizing what was going on when I found out all the stuff that was happening. She asked me for a divorce thinking I would not accept it that I would beg her back and actually I did it. I am so happy now I feel so loved by so many other people where I felt alone, no family no love. She’s even turned my family against me but it’s all right. I found Jesus Christ and he has carried me through this and I feel blessed. Praise the Lord Jesus Christ for opening my eyes and letting me see the light amen.

[Whiskey.T.Foxtrot]

My ex-wife to a tee. Divorced her as soon as our kids were done high school.

Both my kids call or text me daily.

After a long interruption my daughter finally got some counselling and learned some coping skills when dealing with her mother. But as her therapist said...she'll never be a mother to you.

My son also sought counselling but chose the simpler path...he hasn't spoken to her in years.

[dynomike]

Spot on. The hard part once you break free is questioning yourself when you realize some of their narcissim rubbed off on you because for all those years you were trying to defend yourself. You unwittingly wind up adopting some of their tactics. Takes time to learn to be normal again. I'm 51 and don't know if I will ever be able to trust any woman again after 30 combined years of multiple horrible women.
Am I the problem? Partly, of course. But all these NPD videos sure hit the nail on the head with these women, so I'm gonna say that so many things I can look back on and blame myself probably wouldn't have said/done had I not been conditioned by these textbook narcissists for 30 years.

[terryklaus]

Married for 33 years. Children were grown and out of the house. One day she said she was moving out and said she would not tell me why but for me to figure it out. I was left to pay off loans to pay that I was forced to take out and she still expected me to assist her financially while we were separated. Since I was not able to give her enough financially she filed for divorce and got an attorney with the help of her family members. I could not afford an attorney and consented to the divorce and to agree to pay her alimony.
The divorce was granted a year later. But that wasn't enough. Two weeks after the divorce was granted I was summoned to court on an order of protection hearing where she falsely accused me of physically abusing her during our marriage. Why did she wait a year after we separated to throw this on the court? She wanted to continue to punish me and get her retribution for me going through with the divorce and still have control and power over me.