The Covert Narcissist’s Criticism Disguised As Advice. (Understanding Narcissism.) #narcissistic

11 Reasons Why Narcissists Hurt You. (Narcissistic Relationship.) #narcissism

The Difference Between Going No Contact And The Narcissists Silent Treatment.

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[Understandingnarcissism]

For more information about understanding and overcoming narcissistic and emotional abuse, click the links below.

[boogie]

By the time we separated I had zero personality or self left. I had no idea who I was. No hobbies, no friends, was BARELY able to communicate with my family. I felt like an object instead of a person.

[involuntarilycelebrate]

Every time I would go to the grocery store late at night my mom would have to make sure to let me know that she prefers to go during the morning because it's less busy. Wouldn't matter how much I told her that it was actually less busy at night around 9 p.m. that it is at 8 in the morning. It was like she was constantly looking for me to justify her choices. And I couldn't care less what time she went to the store!

[lauranminney]

Yes…. Sabotaging your efforts or trying turn your accomplishments into less or accent negative aspects to crush your happiness and feelings of success. Always jealous. Cannot be truly happy for anyone else’s successes.

[skymeadow]

Thank you sweetheart, he's definitely a covert, I am really seeing him now

[SuperBlakes]

This woman explains abuse so clearly. So good to see how all this works

[kellydavis]

And when your feelings are hurt by their 'advice' they tell you that you can't take criticism. "You've never been able to accept criticism".
"Well now that you mention it I don't have any plans to accept criticism from you multiple times per day".

[Justadudeman]

THEY WAIT UNTIL YOU FALL TO GIVE YOU ADVICE ! THATS CRITICISM !

[ericalagrasta]

Yep, my narc mom 💯. This was one of the catalysts for cutting her off. I have a severely disabled daughter and was venting to my mom about one of her specialists, and my mom interrupted me and said with her fake “caring” tone: “See...you’re problem is that you just ramble, you have to call and just tell them like this” (basically tells me to demand info from whomever answers the phone) ...This is coming from a woman who won’t hang up the phone until I tell her I have to go 5 times.

I’m so glad I went no contact (almost 3 months now!)

[trevornever]

Constantly questioning every little thing you do until u push back and then claim theyre just innocently curious n ur just SO defensive is a classic

[GloriaGonzalez-zzwp]

THAT'S WHY I MOVING ON NO MORE TOXIC NARCS IN MY LIFE 🙏🙏🙏🙏🧬 THANK YOU MS.SHAW ❤🎉

[artmeacademywiththesaltyse]

I call it, in the early stages, conditioning. They want to get a feel for how much they can criticize and what fuel they get from it.
Decades later they can go to the bone or have the children do it too.
Stop it early and plan to get out.
Good content. Thank you

[chrish]

That's the conditioning. Feeling a lack of confidence he tells me what he wants me to do for me. If I don't he's critical and predicts that I will fail. The satisfaction of sticking to what I want and it becomes successful even a little bit is tremendous. But I see his disappointment when he should be supportive.

[rubberbiscuit]

Oh yes. My mother and my sibling are experts at this. Invalidation in the form of "helpful" advice.

[marthaghioctanzania]

Yes my ex husband exactly did this and said your too sensitive. You don’t want to grow. I’m just trying to help you get better 🙄 yeah you don’t have to try and help someone by yelling at me nearly every night.

[gregriddle]

Elizabeth’s information has really opened my eyes albeit 12 years late, but my ex-was a narcissist in our marriage which destroyed it. It was so bad for me personally I have not dated in those 12 years. I’m a musician and just focused all my energy on work and music. I’ve had women who have been interested but I’ve always never really pursued a relationship because I still feel like damaged goods. I have always thought I was the main issue in my divorce and it’s only way after the fact that it all adds up, plus when I was married to her, my friends would say “dude she’s a narcissist “ but when you married to one, you tend to not believe what others say or you don’t see the situation until you are deeply caught up in it. It’s really caused me a lot of self esteem damage. Regardless thank you Elizabeth for the continued education and awareness. 😊

[annmcneal]

I have had this happen with ministers toward me!

[ninewectawski]

I got really good at golf, my husband is who I golfed with and who taught me pretty much. It got to the point where I started to beat him sometimes, and he would start to treat me shitty, he’d stop going with me as much. Yet the years I sucked he’d complain that it take longer cuz I was newer at it, then when I could play at his speed then that was an issue as well.
Last summer we were camping with his sister & brother in law, I was telling them how I outshot a few holes and how I had one a game by 2 strokes. I was so happy about it, that I could play as good as him. My BIL is a golfer too, so he’s like wow that’s awesome, then says to my husband “no way did she really win?”, instead of my husband saying yeah she won, she’s gotten really good, No, he says back “I mean she cheats and takes extra shots, so I mean she didn’t really win”. And I got really upset, went back to the campsite and started to cry. To them I probably looked overly dramatic, but it was just another thing he put me down, he couldn’t speak positively on me, he couldn’t congratulate me or say he was proud of me, way to go, etc., instead he chose to knock me down once more.
And for the last year in a half I have played just as him, I hadn’t taken extra shots, no repeats, like nothing other than playing the game just as he does.

[robertovss]

This reminds me of when the ex wife and I moved to the UK in 2007 and I applied for a job at Tracker Network UK. For 2 months I had the ex wife and her mum saying I will never get the job, I am being messed around by the company, you should apply for a job as a bus driver. When I did get the job they were 'we told you that you would get the job, we told you' but they were not happy as they wanted me to get a job as a bus driver and not an installation engineer. They were not happy as I proved them wrong.

[stefaniamirri]

ATTENTION: This is of ALL NARCISSISTS, not only the Covert, because they have always to appeare as the good ones, or because they are of your family if origin and they play to stay in that loving role even if they dont really care a dime of you. They dont do anything to HELP YOU because they appreciates you and see you, instead they do to maintain their apareance as THE GOOD ONES and to secure you as their supply because at that point you OWE THEM BACK! Covert Narcissism holds and hides resentfulness..means they are not going to tell you if they did not like something from you, but you can bet they will make you pay for it when you could most need their help eventually. And they can act out their resentment in the moment of your need by doing something by their own, or by joining who is attacking you in that difficult moment. THIS is a coverly narcissistic behaviour, "ADVICING FOR YOUR GOOD"(mostly when their advice isnt neither requested from us!!!) instead is a COMMON BEHAVIOUR in every narc.
Watch Out!