Re-Parenting - Part 21 - 12 Needs

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Re-Parenting involves learning how to meet my 12 needs. When do I need help from others? When am I totally responsible myself for my needs? What exactly are my needs?

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DISCLAIMER:
Tim Fletcher is not a doctor or licensed therapist. Tim’s videos are for informational purposes only to provide understanding, learning, and awareness about complex trauma. No information published here can replace professional evaluation, diagnosis, or treatment.

[LDXReal]

The 12 Needs for anyone looking for a list
3:33 pleasure
4:52 physical
7:14 sex
8:58 relationships
11:43 love
15:32 security
17:40 purpose
19:13 rest
20:38 beauty
21:39 sense of wonder
23:26 spiritual
24:11 contentment

[GCA-zzuk]

I am so grateful the algorithm has brought me to Tim Fletcher's channel. In sharing his wisdom, I feel armored with tools and inspired to continue this lifelong journey with complex trauma. Thank you 🙏🏾

For those of us returning to this video, here are the chapters:
1. Pleasure 2:46 & 3:59
2. Food and water 5:59
3. Sex/procreation 7:12
4. Relationships, belonging 9:00
5. Unconditional love 11:40
6. Security 15:00
7. Purpose 17:20
8. Rest 18:50
9. Beauty 20:00
10. Awe 21:11
11. Spiritual 23:22
12. Wholeness 24:12

Reparenting begins at your toolkit age not your biological age.

[chilloften]

So much insight given with patience & love. Thank you Tim Fletcher. You videos bring a wealth of understanding to my soul.

[eyestotheskiesreality]

I learned About Tim around 2005... he helped me so much during my 10 years of therapy... I am now a LMHC...I would run a huge group once a week with homeless veterans ... the first group was listening to one of Tim's videos... at the end I would turn the lights back on and half the clients would be crying...2nd half of the group would be processing the video and clients thoughts and feelings. Today, I tell the majority of my clients to listen to Tim which they AIRWAYS thank me and tell me their"aha" moments. As I listen to Tim today, my heart still grows sad both for myself and my grown children that the intergenerational "small t" traumas continue to be passed down. I pray with each generation (for all of us) that the traumas will decrease... THANK YOU TIM!

[ReneeMichellercvGrace]

Yessss! Adult children! Many of us listening, especially those of us with CPTSD, are NEEDING these basic needs that have not been met in childhood or adulthood.

[SueBolton]

This makes so much sense to me; as a child, I was surrounded by abuse and narcissism; a very dysfunctional family. When I finally moved away, I went through a period where life was all focused on pleasure as I had none growing up; somewhere after that I found balance through counselling and transformation. Fascinating.

[theparkers]

Tim Fletcher, you are incredible! Your wisdom is changing my life! I’m so grateful!🙏💗

[Metaphysics-for-life]

I'm Jewish and just happen to be watching this in March 2024 - Purim is on March 24th 🙂. The Book of Esther isn't in the Torah but it is a very important part of the Judeo-Christian story because it's the only one that doesn't mention God, and is totally dependent upon people doing the right thing. Making the connection to the Bible and other important books is the most valuable part of your teachings. Thank you very much 💖

[gloriahylton]

At 61 your information is very enlightening to me. Thanks for your help in understanding the process of resolving hurt and healing..

[beesilva]

Mr Fletcher, I often listen to you at my high anxiety times & you are so soothing to my worries & anxiety. I can relate to everything you say.

[Videotime-buhu]

I realized a few months ago that the only needs I ever had consistently met or met at all even in adulthood so far except for a couple of years after grad school were physical. This video helps me better understand what I was beginning to realize on my own. I’m glad I found it. I’ve been shamefully guilty of wishing I had a “real trauma” to explain my emotional struggles and discontentment. But now I have a whole new understanding.

[voyagehome]

Some people's sex drive is a white knuckled drive in the fast lane with destruction all along the route and a horrible crash at the end. Many are affected, and not in a good way. 😥

[MyHidingPlace]

Tim, I always feel welcomed by your Friday night greeting. No matter what day it is. ❤🎉

[susuyaag]

I didnt even know that I as a humanbring had all these needs in the first place. Doing my healing so I can heal my relationship and heal my kids so they dont have to suffer starting from scratch when they are in their mid thirties (Im 35 now). Hopefully I succeed. This has become my reason to live. To heal and taste the beauty of living. I also want to help others like me so praying to accomplish those goals in my life. 2024 has brought a huge insight to my life and so much work needs to be. Your prayers for me

[Klonzo]

I love these presentations so much. I was geting ready to spend a ton of money on a therapist but so much of it was so simple once someone logically put words to it. Exciting to think about what the outcome will be

[yuliaantonenkovolkova]

Dr Fletcher, you are saving my sanity and my life.

[bodhischierpaine]

I have just completed the first journalling exercise in the ALIGN course about these 12 needs, and identified that each of these needs was either unmet or met in an unhealthy way in my childhood. Therapists have been telling me for years that I have complex trauma and I've had trouble accepting it (my upbringing was "normal" according to the standards of 90s Australia) but this helps me see clearly that there is a cause for the relational difficulties and addictions I have lived with my whole life. I am grateful that Tim has started to map the way out of these trauma symptoms and I'm very much looking forward to learning how to meet my needs as an adult ... there is light at the end of the tunnel 🙏

[Rebecca_light_artist]

I have so much difficulty with meeting relational needs because it's not a need I can meet myself. It requires the willingness and interaction of others and most of us are so screwed up that reaching through my trauma to another person reaching through usually just becomes a big mess

If I didn't need other people I'd be just fine lol

[LynnRank]

WOW, glad I am not the only one finding these talks incredible!!! To address what went on., ..so good to really be validated for that horriblr horrible time.

[__Fatimah__]

Hope you get 1m subs soon. Deserve it

Thank you for sharing and do what you do