What is learned helplessness?

Learned helplessness is a phenomenon where individuals feel that no matter what they do, they can't escape pain or negative outcomes.

A lot of times this comes from abusive situations, harsh criticism, or even internal struggles like depression and anxiety. These beliefs can stick with you, even when circumstances change.

If you've experienced inescapable pain before, you might not realize when you have opportunities for safety and happiness now. Don't assume you're still in the same situation; test the floor of your life for safety and change your perspective.

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Hear the Podcast:

What's covered:
00:00 Learned Helplessness in Life

03:11 The Study of Learned Helplessness

06:21 Learned Helplessness: Lessons from Dogs

09:24 Reevaluating Your Life's Cage

Disclaimer: This content is not intended to be a replacement for receiving treatment. It is purely educational in nature. My relationship with you is that of presenter and audience, not therapist and client. But I do care.

[Outlawsrevenge]

I was emotionally abused since early childhood, and as a kid I tried everything to make it stop. Then in my 20s, I lost hope in everything. I gave up, because there was no escape. Now as an adult, I don't try anymore. I feel like I am just going with the flow, instead of building a life that's worth living.

[richtea]

I'm so tired of nothing leading anywhere; no reward or recognition, no matter the risk. When you have no evidence that things can get better, it is next to impossible to believe otherwise.

[Job.Well.Done_]

I have self-sabotaged my entire life because of my insecurities.
I always hit an imaginary limit and sabotage it.
Once I started therapy and doing the work it slowly got better, but I’ve lost out on so many millions of dollars and beautiful relationships/opportunities because of my trauma and insecurity.
I’m so sorry to anyone who has suffered.
I love you all.

[OnlyOneName]

"there's nothing I can do to make them a SAFE person" - I had to pause there. You just gave me a step forward in my healing process with this statement. Thank you!

[Laz_RS]

This study defines my life. Yes life is pain and suffering, but it's the relentless knock down when trying for something better that breaks you.

[siobhanmairii]

I have a close friend in my life who is experiencing this. They have been depressed since they were a kid, and they’re in their early 30s now. They’ve pretty much given up on getting better or improving their situation. What is even more heartbreaking is that they are incredibly intelligent and have a lot of potential. I want to help them but I myself feel helpless.

[AprilMears-jq]

Well....this really hit home for me. My sister and I grew up with a very critical, harsh, narcissistic mother and verbally and emotionally abusive father. To this day....NOTHING I DO IS EVERRRR "RIGHT". Nothing I do is ever good enough. And I mean NEVER. I believe that I gave up on many things years ago because....as you said...."why even try?" I'm 53 years old now. I have chronic health problems and chronic pain. Gee?! I wonder why?!! I've been invalidated my entire life. Mocked. And called every despicable name you can think of by my own father. My mother never stood up for me. But she did for my father. Sick. Right now I'm actually staying with my parents because I'm looking for a new place to live. I had nowhere else to go. And I'm still being treated like a kid. Still being invalidated and mocked. And now I have an ulcer. Hmmm. But there's a door that I can walk in and out of anytime, everyday and I don't. Or I haven't 🤔. So...my good friend who lives in New Jersey asked me to come stay with him. Because now I realize....yes it took this long!....that no matter how much therapy I get Nothing is ever going to change. My parents are toxic people with toxic behaviors. So I have to literally save myself from them. Sorry for the novel! But thank you for this truly insightful video! 😊

[miriam]

Doc! I’ve probably watched 6 to 8 of your videos. I’ve actually felt some healing emotionally and mentally. I went to bed the other night and actually had the thought…oooo I’m excited about waking up tomorrow…..with nothing exciting planned for the day. 😮 keep going with your videos…. You’re making breakthroughs in lives. Thank you so much. ❤

[suzanneshephard]

Wow! I've always wondered why I am so nervous about putting forth effort towards something...the fear has always been "What if I put in all this effort and nothing comes of it, or it fails, or my effort is disparaged?" Thank you for solving that for me!

[michaelcox]

I've gotten a lot more useful input from your videos than anything else I've found. I wish I could find a therapist as good as you are.

[asgardianews]

I know the 'cage' is gone now, but just lay there and do nothing, and can't find the will to complete anything. I try to do all the things I enjoyed before, and every one of them feels just as empty as the cage.

[imjustsam]

I'm 38 just realizing my full potential. Where there's breath there's opportunity. It can and does absolutely get better if you want it to and you're willing to put the work in. You're already here getting informed so you've already started doing it 😀.

[CMoore]

One of the sad things about depression is it makes people feel so isolated and all alone. Depression lies to us. Many many people are suffering. Not just us.

[EtherTheReal]

I like how the message isnt that its completely safe now but there is a very good chance, that whatever caused you pain in a certain area of your life, has now gone...thank you Dr. Scott...

[maxsheerin]

This is so accurate. Im currently in survival mode on the couch for over a year now. I cant afford trauma therpay so these videos are helping somewhat in recognising things about me. Im 44 and spemd my time wondering wtf was i put on this planet to do.
Thank you for your videos 🙏💝

[gaiagoddess]

This describes me perfectly, however I AM still trying to find the non-electrified parts of my cage, even in my 50's, and still getting shocked. I have been struggling my entire life with everything about life because I am autistic, and this is why life will always be a struggle for me because autistic people are treated poorly in our society and not given the support we need. I'm practically at the end of my rope after so many decades of not just trying but getting real legit responses that I cannot be helped, every single day there are multiple examples of this where I am trying to escape the pain but I'm thrown back into it by society, by friends, by the government, by my therapists, by other professionals assigned to help me, and now I'm realizing that my learned helplessness was right, that I am stuck and things will never get better.

[dead_eddy]

I feel like in my life I'm the electric floor more so than my environment. My struggles with anxiety, and ADHD make engaging with close to most things in a day painful and exhausting. The most frustrating part for me is that every time I try to improve my life and fail, the learned helplessness and depression get a little worse. These days I find it hard to get myself to do anything because I never seem to improve, grow or learn. I'm just trying to keep trying at anything healthy and productive; I just feel so exhausted.

[rahrahrobbbieee]

When your Mom does this to you, the powerlessness and depression are overwhelming. After decades of not understanding, as I begin to understand, if feel staggering hopelessness.
I know which dog I was.

[haydenlee]

this is a topic that everyone needs to learn more about. I’ll also add that people cannot overcome Learned Helplessness alone, the brain that has learned the “learned helplessness” needs to be “taught” that there is an unelectrified floor. You cannot just “find a way out” from Learned Helplessness, the brain won’t let you. It has to be broken, not overcome

[LouLou-wgbe]

I would love for you to make a video on how to find a therapist that suits you according to your needs. After watching hundreds of videos all over YouTube and years of therapy you are the only therapist I’ve been able to relate too because you’ve been there and are honest about it. I’ve always been a strong believer that I should be able to interview my therapist before I decide to move forward but I’ve never been sure how to do that without being insulting or disrespectful. A few times I’ve tried to ask questions and been told that I was there for me not them and I felt very dismissed. How can you accomplish anything if you’re therapist can’t relate and is just treating you by what a medical book says. I’ve also been told that it’s unethical or unprofessional. I’ve wasted so much time with a therapist to only realize it wasn’t the right fit and that just makes me more discouraged. Suggestions?