9 things we grieve as we heal from narcissistic relationships.

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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.

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[marcella]

It's also the embarrassment that you've been played multiple times. and asking yourself "How did I not see this??"

[pinkmeadows]

I grieve lost opportunities, lost time, lost youth, lost confidence, lost healthy mentality, and lost innocence. Recovery is sometimes more painful than the abuse itself.

Edit: I thank you all for the ❤️’s and well wishes! Means a lot to me and much blessing’s to you all as well 🥲🙏

[JeanneTarrant-up]

I grief the "death" of the person I thought I loved. But he did not exist.

[Heather-xzfk]

I grieve the wasted time, energy, lost peace of mind, lost community and the loss of what I believed I had. I grieve that I didn't pay more attention to the red flags and not get involved in the first place. I grieve that I stuck it out for so long and let myself be taken advantage of and taken for granted. I grieve that I refused to see the truth.

[jokendrick]

And there will be no justice. For me injustice is the hardest pill to swallow.

[laurachowanski]

I’m in the grieving phase of my healing and it is excruciating. Somewhere along the line I realized the abuse was worse than I remembered. I grieve the inability to see what was really happening and stand up for myself all these years thinking I was the problem. I’m 56.

[CTHou]

9-things we grieve or have to give up to heal

1. Hope
2. Healthy childhood and a soft place to land
3. Time (lost time)
4. Grieving a future (it may look empty)
5. Sense of family and belonging
6. Stability(consistency)
7. Narratives (stories about our lives - or that some day justice will be served)
8. Loss of innocence
9. Loss of any sense of justice

[TimetoWonder]

The grief has been so overwhelming that I cannot imagine returning to the status quo. I can't unsee what I've seen/ learned.

[AminataWoods]

The most painful thing that I am grieving is the loss of my innocence. I was so sociable before being aware of narcissism. I don't like how terrified I am of the world and people now

[bisquts]

I left and divorced my husband 6 years ago. It ended a 41 year marriage. I was 69 and the Mother of 2 wonderful daughters and blessed with 2 precious granddaughters. I am so angry that I didn’t leave 30 years earlier. I grieved for the loss of family. Now I am rebuilding my life. I really don’t know how to start. I miss so much and I am scared of making mistakes. Peace and love ❤️

[sushmayen]

We should first give up all hope that some day things will get better. They cannot and will not change..that's what we grieve

[nilaja-itsmylife]

He who increases wisdom increases sorrow

[ColinKuan]

I grieve more for my narcissistic partner more than myself, I grieve for the life we could have had, I grieve for the fact that I couldn't save my partner from himself, I grieve that all the love I gave to him wasn't enough to break out of the hell he made himself, and I grieve that I can no longer be a part of that life.

[elizabethsprecher]

I am grieving who I used to be, my carefree self, my trust in others, my not knowing so much, my love for friendships and close connections. Someone took all of that away and I don’t know if I’ll ever get it back.

[Wb-iswi]

I grieve the dream I thought I lived….

[Ominous]

After 19 years of trying to cope with a narcissistic mother, I got framed, blackmailed, betrayed and ditched on the street. I lost my family and girlfriend at the same time. The grief was so overwhelming, it caused a high functioning depression that lasted for over a decade, alcoholism and self medicating with MJ. The depression caused a decade of hoarding. And the decade of hoarding resulted in 30K debts, homelessness, more family conflict, and ultimately also cutting ties with my father's half of the family after brutally betraying me while I was homeless. I was reborn as an orphan. Once I came home, I woke up to narcissistic 'friends' and also cut ties with them. And while I was at it, I also completely quit alcohol over a year ago after a few years of fading it out. Next year my debts are done. I'll be 36 years old then. Only the last 3 years I have been been able to live a somewhat normal life.

I just took out the trash and started with a clean slate. It was a long way coming.

[Ina-wnjd]

Hope no more. It is difficult to realize that the only best thing to do is to avoid them.

[KeishaWoodbridge]

I feel like I'm dying inside. It's overwhelming. I have good days and bad.

[SparkleAndShine-hhvv]

I’m grieving my lost childhood my lost opportunities as a child and my identity(I still am) my hijacked soul(I still am) the little girl inside of me is literally crying 😭 so much right now. I don’t know 🤷‍♀️ who I am in today’s world and it’s the most terrible feeling in the world for me 😭😭😭.

[carolynkepler]

I’m grieving the FACT that I never had a family. It is a fact. As I’ve gotten to know other people where I live, I realize how little actual love I received. I’m alone now; I have two older brothers but I went no contact with the oldest one and seldom talk to the other. I never fit in with any of them. My mother stole my life from me. The brother was that I still talk to invalidates me every time I bring it up so our conversations are superficial. I’ve never had a real relationship with anyone.