Why do I Feel So Angry??

As you know, anger is often a secondary emotion. Meaning that it’s used to protect us from something else we are feeling, such as humiliated, hurt, scared, rejected or anything that’s hard to admit we feel. Anger can seem safer than those emotions, and when asked what’s going on or how we are feeling, we can confidently say “I feel angry!” Or even if we aren’t comfortable feeling angry or saying that out loud, we can stew in it instead of admitting to ourselves that we are actually very hurt. In other words, whether we express our anger outwardly or not, it’s still there and more comfortable than the primary emotion.
For the most part, anger exists as a way for us to get out of any threatening situation and survive, that’s why when we feel vulnerable, hurt, or humiliated (for example) anger pops up and distracts us. It senses the threat of more hurt or upset and protects us. And if you hadn’t guessed this already, anger is triggered by our amygdala. You know, that part of our brain responsible for our fight, flight or freeze response. That’s why anger can often feel so out of control.

I'm Kati Morton, a licensed therapist making Mental Health videos!
#katimorton #therapist #therapy

MY BOOKS (in stores now)

ONLINE THERAPY

Join this channel to get access to perks:

YOU CAN SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING WITH OUR AFFILIATE LINKS

PARTNERSHIP

PLEASE READ
If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room.

[ossen]

Nothing wrong with any emotion, it's how we choose to act or react upon them that makes a huge difference.

[sherylw]

I was "taught" as a child not to express my own anger, or punishment would follow. I'm only now learning how to even recognize that what I feel is anger. it's never too late to learn and benefit from therapy!

[pvdm]

I love how you say “because I am a therapist, I know when I screw up”. That is so true

[tomatobastardo]

I just feel like there's no justice. People wrong me and get away with it. I can't let it go. I'm always thinking about it. I'm always angry.

[jahinoel]

This made me realize something so important. I’m angry all the time bc I can’t admit that I’m hurt and people did that to me. I was made out to seem like an angry person with issues but I’m a hurt person that, at the time, wasn’t able to admit that I was hurt/wronged.

[KS-nemq]

I’m always angry because my whole life everyone else’s decisions affect my life in the worst ways.

[lisasnoozy]

I wasn’t allowed to have feelings growing up and I’m learning to feel now. Anger is one I don’t know what to do with yet. I genuinely feel angry when I’m hurting. I’m learning to journal and paint my feelings too. Thank you for your videos Kati!

[AngelGarcia-jfzq]

When I’m angry it’s because my own family tries to hurt me when I have nothing to do with their problems.

[Roxy]

I never thought about anger being a cover for another emotion. It made me realize that I’ve been feeling rejected for a while and didn’t want to admit that to myself. Thank you so much Kati your videos are amazing!❤️

[madhavikamble]

So introspective.. I definitely need to find my primary emotion.. I also agreed with you that anger helps us in setting boundaries.. Thank you for the video

[kiawe]

As an artist and psych student here. Just wanted to say how much I love this special format using art as therapy. It definitely helps me. Thank you both for a great and insightful video.

[jennifermorales]

the problem with me is, sometimes, anger feels good or I thrive off of it. Like I dont want to stop shouting or cursing. When I stop I feel terrible after ward and then guilty

[Micheline.Maalouf]

This is a really cool concept Kati! this is an important topic to talk about. Many people are ashamed of their anger and really it's a healthy emotion too. It serves a purpose and thank you for covering this.

[moell]

This is why it's so important to reflect on how we're feeling, and to label it, and to understand why. I loved this video! The part where you talked about anger being important because it helps us to realise when our boundaries are being crossed resonated with me. I had a trauma where I felt my boundaries were completely crossed and it made me feel unsafe, so for years after that whenever someone crossed a boundary I would explode with anger because it was the only way I knew how to make myself feel safe. In the long run it led to me feeling more shameful for how I reacted, and alienated people who I had mutual love and care for. I'm now learning more healthy ways of expressing my anger, this was a really helpful topic and I'm glad you covered it and explained it so well.

[storytellerhut]

I love that you talk about yourself and your own struggles and even your own therapy. That’s so honest and gutsy! It makes me trust you even more.

[SandeepSinghCreator]

You mean deep triggering rage as a result of CPTSD from narcissistic abuse.
I like to talk about my anger. It drives me into right direction. I can't tolerate Sociopaths ruling around. And trauma bond.
Thanks Katie for this video. To be seen or heard is utmost valuable. Love painting!!! It's beautiful and expressive! I love to express my anger emotions.❤️ Graffiti 😊

[pinatajuju]

For me anger is something I never bothered to learn about until now because it's destroying my relationship. Thank you for sharing.

[angelobertolani]

You are amazing Kati, the way you explain things and express yourself . You truly have a gift, and I would love to have you as a therapist. Can only wish .

[Tensolin]

I would say anger has its place. But it’s not good to rely on it.

[sambarta]

Just found your channel as a third-year Psych student living in Australia! You are a beautiful combination of being kind, light-hearted, insightful, funny and cute (whoops).. Subscribed!!