How to Forgive Others | Coffee with Hampton

Learning to forgive others has been one of the most powerful skills for my happiness, success, and mental health.

I used to think it was bogus, but a MAJOR turning point for me was learning that forgiveness wasn't necessarily to help others, but to help ourselves.

I talk about 2 stories where I was wronged. One was an inconsequential story back when I was in college, and another was a very serious wrongdoing from a case worker at the hospital when my mother was sick.

Using these 2 stories as context, I talk about how learning to feel love and compassion for those that hurt us ultimately make us stronger and more resilient.

I hope this can help!

#forgiveness #hybridcalisthenics #coffeewithhampton #podcast #forgive

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[HybridCalisthenics]

UPDATE: Had to run, but thank you to everyone who dropped by!

Hey all! Doing a live audio room in our Discord at 6:30 PM Central Time (30 minutes after posting this) to hang out with some of you wonderful people and do Q&A.



Have a wonderful weekend!

[jamesellis]

Man's is really helping us heal body and soul

[GaryPwner]

"Holding onto anger and resentment is like grasping a hot coal just to throw at someone, you yourself will get hurt"

[javelin]

Hampton, you are a precious cinnamon roll who is too pure for this world. It's rare to find content makers like you. Thank you for being here.

[FlygonSal]

Saw that title, and i instantly clicked. Got a person i wanna forgive just to move forward myself, but damn is this tough.

[ApexHerbivore]

Thanks for this, Hampton. You're so right.
I held a grudge for 20 years against a family member who wronged me.
It bothered me deep down even though I pretended it didn't. I was holding out for an apology that never came.
Eventually I decided I had to forgive him and let go. So I did. I didn't tell him. The act of forgiveness was for me to let go, not for him to be absolved of guilt. But anyway, after I forgave him he noticed a change in me but couldn't put his finger on it. Something inside him clicked and the guilt became too much. After 20 years of nothing happening, that internalised forgiveness that I gave started something in him and he ended up writing me a 10 page letter apologising and asking for forgiveness. I told him I'd already forgiven him. Our awkward family meetings were over and it brought our family back together. One of the best things I've done.
All the best to you and thanks for your continued quality content. Much love.

[buddycollier]

I absolutely understand not wanting to make a situation worse. I understand letting it go emotionally so that it doesn’t damage you as you live your life. However, people who abuse their positions need to be stopped. If they did it to you they will do it to someone else. Sometimes you have to wait until you are out of their line of fire before you act but if you have documented everything you should use it to protect those that may have to endure what you did.

[dawoudalam]

I refuse to believe this guy hasn't been enlightened in some way this dude an angel

[timothye.]

The fact you grew up in the American Bible Belt and not only maintained your faith into adulthood, but developed such a humanistic, loving, Christ-like worldview is astounding, and it makes me so happy. I'm glad to have access to your wisdom and encouragement through Youtube, and I hope you continue to do well in life.

[zachtrek]

Well, I started out with pullup advice and ended up here! Great video. Forgiveness is a favorite topic/practice of mine. Here are a few of my thoughts: First, when I set out to forgive someone, I find it important to first acknowledge in minute detail every way I feel the person has wronged me. If I forgive the action but not the bad attitude, I may find later on that I haven't really forgiven. Second, I only feel justified in forgiving what has been done to me. If you punch me, I'll forgive you. If you punch someone else, I'll probably come swinging to their defense. Third, I completely agree with "forgive, but don't necessarily forget." Lastly, forgiveness isn't always a one-time process for me. If I try to forgive, but later on find out that I'm still holding onto that grudge, I repeat the process. When I forgive successfully, even for small things, it often feels as though a physical weight is lifted from me. Not that that makes pullups any easier...

[outorii]

We’ve all been Alex the baby dropper at one point in our lives, I generally choose to forgive because I’m sure I’ve done things I don’t even realize that someone had to forgive, and I should show the same generosity to them. It helps me to think in most cases people don’t do things out of malice alone

[cde]

oh my... this man gives proper workout and relationship advice... all we need now is business advice. A good full circle.

Keep up the awesome work.
Best regards from Portugal

[Pinkfrosting]

I’m so sorry for your loss Hampton. She surely was an amazing woman by the man you turned out to be. God bless you! Thank you for being here.

[GabesHacks]

24:50 - "Someone who hurt you is often hurting themselves. Someone who has gone through abuse is much more likely to abuse you."
Very timely. I'm going through this right now. It's hard to let go, respect that person's free will, and let them make the decisions they're making even though it's hurting you and everyone around them, while at the same time feeling like you need to protect yourself from someone you love.

[narakabladepointplayer]

so sad to hear that your mother died :( hope you are doing well my friend, if you mentioned it before my bad. you are a great man i wanna strive to be more like you

[thehypest]

We hear about and discuss the concept of forgiveness in the CPTSD communities a lot, it's a very difficult concept to wrap your head around when you've had unforgivable things done to you, I myself haven't been able to navigate past the anger yet but I hope to find peace one day,

if anyone reading this can relate to a general aversion to even just the term forgiveness, try working with acceptance instead, that's what I've had to switch over to,

Really appreciate your take on it Hampton, hope you're keeping well

[dustinmurphyable]

God bless you. Sorry for your loss. I can only imagine how proud your mother was of you and would be now. I really appreciate all you do. It’s nice to be able to slow down and actually put some things in perspective! Again thank you sir 🙏

[kati-ana]

Bravo Hampton. Forgiveness is giving oneself life and freedom of the soul. It's not about giving the hateful person a pass, it's about giving yourself love and respect.

[dalemcgonigal]

Forgiveness is not about the other person. It's about you letting go of the pain. The need for acknowledgement, or restitution. You don't need prove that you have forgiven to anyone

[antokaknee]

I swear you always know what I need. I’m currently going through a mental shift of how two of my closest friends have hurt me but I want to get back together with but I can’t pull myself to forgive them when I know we both want to be friends again. Thank you Hampton for your words and affirmation.