Dark INFJs

#infj #16personalities #mbti

What happens when INFJs go dark? Well, scary stuff...

[brittl]

As an infj who has recently been in touch with that dark side, I like to visualize it as a long fuse. My last job was always chaotic, and as a manager, i tried to be as kind and compassionate as possible and was successful for a while... until it became toxic. Then it felt like my ability and desire to be kind was being ripped away from me. Coworkers would lie to get me to cover shifts and cause unneccesary drama, and after a while i found myself assuming everyone was lying and it was almost impossible for me to feel any genuine concern for anyone that wasn't immediate family.

I have since quit and am in therapy to try and heal.

[ambrosearts]

VERY accurate as would add that we have extreme swings from being selfless to be selfish but usually only obviously selfish when we are pushed or struggling to survive due to others being self serving in the first place. With age I have learned to make myself be 1/3 selfish just to survive on an average day but mess with me badly and I will be unrestrained in my self determination to even the score and as an excessive planner I can usually out wit anyone but maybe a psychopath....even them I can (sometimes) hold my own with.

[LL-muddy]

Once again painfully spot on. The choice to be respectful and compassionate seems like the obvious one (treat others how you wish to be treated). So we make these choices expecting others to make them too. When this is taken for granted or not returned repeatedly/chronically, we get resentful. Because it IS a CHOICE. It's not as if we're not capable of making a different one. This is where INFJ burnout comes into play. I think maturity and experience is what ultimately morphs a resentful INFJ into one that does it simply because it's the right thing to do without any expectation of return, while still maintaining healthy boundaries.

[luminyam]

The INFJs in my life (including my son) see me the most clearly. I am so grateful that they don't bring the hammer down on my vast flaws, because they totally could.

[ahistoryperson]

This guy is so unique! He reminds me of the person from Smurf’s. In a positive way!

[rockiecheng]

I am an INFJ-A, I do have the tendency to withhold certain poking's most of the times, to avoid hurting others to the absolute! There are moments I cut straight to the point if needed.

[emerald.city.photographyle]

In a toxic relationship this becomes an issue. In healing I am learning to be softer and more reserved after jabbing that stick so many times in defense of myself and to gain space. I know it hurts, don't make me impale you! Lol darkness

[solarisan_]

For me, perfectionism comes from a sense of inadequacy. Could be because of my cognitive process. Or the way I was raised and the impact it had on the way I see things. There are two sides to this : orientation towards change, transformation, and novelty. Or getting fixated on replaying thoughts that have a narrative that follows a premise of: I am not good enough. Neither of these things is "easy" to go through (even if the first option may sound better). Why isn't it? Because you realize that the type of change that needs to occur to achieve true progress will be hard to accept and adapt to for most. So, you have to learn to adapt regardless of how hard it may be for you as an individual. Which leads to the second part. And that slowly turns into thoughts that go like this: What is the point of life? Does an individual's absence or presence really matter?

[havefun]

I've found that my dark side loves me and cares about me so much 🥰 while it's dangerous for almost everyone else who mess with me. I have to try super hard to stop this monster to free itself and do whatever it desires otherwise.. man.. it's gonna be chaos. It's so weird that once i used to be hella kind as a saint and now that I've been in my dark side for a few years, i feel like like a sociopath fighting the urge to not give in to these dark thoughts. I think I won't ever become a bad person tho. I'll never hurt an innocent person. But man those who have destroyed me.. my mind plans something every now and then to get even with them.. and those plans are genius, dark but also justifiable in my situation. But am i going to act on them? Perhaps, no. I'll find a middle way. The voice between the idealistic and dark side. Losing my goodness and becoming like them would be the real defeat for me. I'm fighting the urge to still have my good heart while on the outside I've to keep a cold heart for all of my so called friends and the people i live with and have to deal with everyday.

[Amanita._.Verosa._.]

Exactly why -unless thorough analysis proves the situation to be unresolvable any other way- I do not poke.

[pastelpink]

I'm an infp and idk where to poke and i don't care, in life i just want to be left alone 😅 connecting with infjs had those weird moments where we both recognise how similar we are yet we're very different in our... motivations? The few infjs i met cared way more about status then self expression and i always had authenticity as #1 😅

[artofstoryza]

The background music 😈 love it, fitting! Great content too. Thank you for sharing accurate enlightenment so that we can have words to assign to our natural tendencies and decide to keep, chuck or change 👍💃

[JanineKlingele]

Would you please expand & add examples about *sensory perfection l* & *sensory details*?

Bless you!

[Tontoquienloleation]

INFJs make the best villain protagonists: Tom Ripley, Amy Dunne, Joe Goldberg (and Dan Humphrey lol)

[cazbee]

You speak to the power of the menopause.
Probably for a lot of nice types (FJs, not biased), the switch up in testosterone means they're gunna start unleashing some shite.

[riyajacob]

I have met narcissistic INFJs too.Fellow INFJ

[missdenim]

Sensory Perfection. I'm 49 year old infj woman. I needed to hear that. Thank you 😊 My quest for this Perfection has had me constantly manipulating everything around me. I'm not a dark infj, though I know I could be. I guess in my constant, until now unknown quest for this, maybe I have looked a bit dark from time to time. I feel I've mostly only hurt myself with this. how to stop this quest 🤔

[aiuchiha]

INFJs make the best villains. The kind which make you want to give in to darkness.

[PriHL]

Yeah, it's true with the sensory obsession. But that's not dark. If you say dark INFJs I'd relate it to a whole psychological construct like for example when someone is a psychopath. But the poking exactly where it hurts is a dark aspect if used, because we know but might actually not act on it. I used to warn someone who wanted to fuck around with me that this is exactly what I'm going to do because I know exactly what your weak point is, so better behave. I only stared at them a few times in a prolonged and decisive manner. They never did anything again.

[Heart.headed]

Sup Nate.
In your opinion, what's the quintessential tell of whether or not one is an INFJ, or ENFP? 🤔