How To Deal With ADHD Kids and Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD)

ADHD Dude provides parent training through the ADHD Dude Membership Site, in-person school-year programs, and summer camps. ADHD Dude is not gender-specific content.

𝗔𝗗𝗛𝗗 𝗗𝘂𝗱𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝗥𝘆𝗮𝗻 𝗪𝗲𝘅𝗲𝗹𝗯𝗹𝗮𝘁𝘁, 𝗟𝗖𝗦𝗪, 𝗔𝗗𝗛𝗗-𝗖𝗖𝗦𝗣
Ryan is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Certified School Social Worker, and father to a son with ADHD & learning differences. ADHD Dude is based in Tucson, Arizona.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗷𝗼𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗔𝗗𝗛𝗗 𝗗𝘂𝗱𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗺𝘂𝗻𝗶𝘁𝘆:

ADHD Dude is for educational purposes. I am not serving in a clinical capacity and cannot provide clinical consultation or free advice through YouTube comments, email, etc.

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[heatherjuliet]

It’s a daily struggle that is exhausting!!

[StaceyShaf]

What if it is something you need them to do… like homework or getting ready for school or getting in the car to go to school?🥴

[kristinanderson]

we need a part 2 to this. what if it is something that needs to get done?

[Crabbycancer]

My son, exactly …. It’s so hard to do this…but I see worth it

[sxirifg]

This was very helpful and I agree they are looking for and wanting a reaction. So it is best to not react. However, I do have one question though, how do you get them to do what they are required to do...for example, go to school?

[jacquelineprotka]

But what if this means they don’t brush their teeth for days?! 😩

[qudtigv]

Omg I'm drowning! My son isn't the combative type he's quiet and actually very manipulative and he lies quicker than I can speak. And he doesn't even twitch. Hes stealing from school classmates and stores and only puts on the water works when he's caught. Sometimes. I can't do this 😭😭😭. He doesn't shower, and has been wearing the same underwear for weeks! He was horse playing at school and got into a fight and got suspended for the second time this year. Idk if this is necessary ODD or ADHD. My mommituition keeps telling me it's something else but idk or how to get the doctor to hear what I'm saying. I'm going to email his nurse and try one more time but I have nowhere else to go afterwards. This is horrible.

[DiDi_]

Do you have a video giving us some hope about how and when you’re child grew out of it?

[IleanaPadron-pnro]

I’m currently struggling with my 9 yr old son he wants to tell me no for everything I ask him to do he’s improved at home with using this strategy but at school he refuses to do school work when his teacher asks him to do so he also tells other teachers and adults at the school that he doesn’t have to listen to them I’m so lost on what to do it’s emotionally exhausting

[Natalia-frpd]

What should I do if my son continues using F word or different curses all day long just to get the reaction?when I do not react he repeats and repeats it all the time and he does it louder or towards other people e.g. neighbours. He is 4years old. He does not understand social skills. Thank You!

[NeuroSpicyMomOf]

We just got into an INSANE tantrum again with my 6 year old! Every night to brush his teeth is a complete disaster! Tonight it was “i hate you! You suck!” …. We’ve already had to get him put to sleep for dental surgery 😔
I honestly dont even know how to fix this anymore 😭💔

[nuralanur]

I disconnect by not giving my child an answer for not following my instructions, but he doesn't stop there. He will ignore my silence and pressure me on what he wants me to do for him next. What should I do?

[notes]

Hi Ryan! Our son is 7 and when he is frustrated he can lash out physically until he calms down. My therapist recommended The Explosive Child where its more about skills and I also watched the section on the membership site which is about the behaviors. We dont know which way is going to be more effective - are these tandem strategies and Im missing something? They seem to contradict each other

[cinthyahaneda]

What if they don’t say anything, and just ignore what you are saying pretending they are bot listening?

[holleighlordel]

Need honest answer. Are there any current adults who were diagnosed ADHD/ODD/ASD as children who now can do math & writing, have meaningful relationships and hold down a decent job? Or are they all in jail or unemployed with no friends? If they’re actually doing well as an adult how did they achieve that?