Overcoming Resentment: Healing Emotional Wounds in Your Marriage| #marriageproblems

Overcoming Resentment: Healing Emotional Wounds in Your Marriage | #marriageproblems #thestruggleisreal //

Are you struggling to overcome resentment in your marriage? Are you wanting to heal the wounds in your marriage? Watch this video to learn how to heal old wounds and overcome resentment.

Next, watch 🎥 Balancing Parenting Roles and Maintaining a Strong Marriage | #marriageproblems #thestruggleisreal

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00:00 Overcoming resentment
00:30 Resentment comes from unmet expectations
04:34 Spoken vs unspoken contracts
09:00 What does real love look like
10:20 The path to peace
14:00 Love yourself

#couplegoals #healing #mendedlight #jonathandecker

[melissabaysinger]

What touched me was: We were doing things to get love and doing things to protect from losing it. This was me.

[Miss_Lexisaurus]

this is so relatable - I'm so similar to Alicia in that I will give and give and give of myself in the belief that if I give enough then they will show up for me too, and actually so often they don't. It's so hard to stop that.

[MorgueInTheVoid]

Those little back handed comments from Alicia always break my heart because I know what it's like all too well to be in Jono's position and even if it's a joke, there's a past that can definitely confirm for us that those little comments are not jokes, but based off of genuine opinions from the other person about us and for some reason they feel like it's necessary to make those comments when it's hurtful and adds nothing to the conversation whether it's a joke or not....

[mikameeks]

This touched something. I'm sobbing.

[mariaana]

You are so Brave... I am repiting myself, but is so true.
Quote of the day: love isn't changing who you are for the other, it's expanding it.

[colt]

This video got me. My situation sounds so similar to your marriage. My wife wanted “space” a month and a half ago and she still looks at me like she hates me. We can talk about the kids and stuff but she has 0 interest in me otherwise. I was guilty of the same thing. I spent years telling her I do my best when she told me her needs that I wasn’t meeting. I feel so foolish now that my eyes are open. I heard her but didn’t HEAR her. I really hope that we can get to your level one day. She sees my changes that I’ve been making and says what I’m offering sounds so nice to her, but she doesn’t think she can trust it.

[walkingwith_dinosaurs]

I've watched just the half of it and already this video is so deep and thought-provoking. I'm in love with this series! I don't have an example of a healthy marriage relationship so your videos are very precious and really beneficialfor me!💖💖💖

[indigo]

I respect both of you so much. Most people avoid telling stories in ways that require them to acknowledge anything unflattering about themselves. You doing a great job not only of explaining healthy relationship dynamics, but of demonstrationg how it's okay to work together and acknowledge both that each of you can be wrong/behave wrongly and that listening to negative feedback is not only okay its necessary so you can take responsibility for your choices and correct yourself, and then that it's okay to share those experiences with others.

[s_napps]

I'm 21. I've seen and recognized myself in Alicia's place of self-sacrifice to the point of betraying myself. And frankly it's because I am so young and still not fully established that I never even realized I was betraying myself. Seeing that it genuinely hurts and that it's a very real thing makes me feel less crazy about the idea that I can betray myself, or that I can and have been so self-sacrificing for so much of my life. I'm currently trying to find myself and learn to love myself and accept and recognize everything I am. You say it all the time Jono and I feel I can say it too, I am valuable.

[SelkiesSong]

Heya Jono; the random interjection of media is fine and fun but the volume difference at 8:15 just about made me jump off my chair lol; just something to watch for in future videos?

Y'all are amazing and I love both this channel and cinema therapy; it's been so incredibly helpful so thank you for all the effort!

[sylviawhite]

Id love to see a video elaborating on the process the wife went through with her overly showing up to get love. It resonated with me and sometime it’s hard to see where and how I do it and make reasonable adjustments and yet maintain as a mother, a partner and still show up for responsibilities id like to keep up for myself.

[meganc]

There were so many points in this video that were like “Oh, yeah, this is SO true.” So much so that I can’t really comment more fully as I am still processing. It’s like looking in the mirror and saying “Wow, I just noticed I have a giant gaping wound in my chest. I’ll bet I’ve been suppressing a whole bunch of pain. Huh…”

[SafetyatHome]

I left my ex husband 12 years ago, and I have just finished listening to the Resentment session. A lot of emotional baggage is being dissected and put into perspective for me and the reasons I left. I lied to myself, my ex and our beautiful children because I didn’t have the courage or the confidence to trust them to help me heal and learn to love. What a great big stupid thing I did!!!! 😢😢

[terrymark]

My wife has resentment from my past infidelity over 18 yrs ago as well as our careers. I have carried guilt with me from that situation and my past trauma Ms of being abused self esteem and self loathing. I have rubbed her of trust and she has resented me for it. We have 26 yrs together and she has said she is not in love with me any longer. I have been working on myself for 8 months through counseling and I have finally accepted myself and love myself now. I have given her space she asked for in hopes she will see my changes. Thank you for this video.

[stoneadventures]

I was taught that resentment was out of jealousy.

There have been several times that i was upset/angry at someone for doing something or not doing something that was agreed they'd do, but it wasn't until they had something that I didn't that i becamd resentful. Example: I wanted to do projects around the house and it led to argument after argument, but someone else jumped in and started doing a project and person i was trying to communicate to do other project with jumped right in with the other person when there was little to no conversation about it happening and they were joking the entire time. I was jealous because I wanted it to play out in such a manner i could joke and goof around and it didn't happen that way. That's what I felt lead to resentment.

I'm okay with being wrong, i just want clarity or if I'm right, to enlighten.

[sofijarogan]

Hello, guys! Alicia, I just gotta say I have always thought that I have nothing in common with closer personality. My mom is a closer and we fight a lot, but I am closer with her than my dad who is a dreamer-thinker. Mom is also a healer. I am a healer-thinker. Today listening to you, I realized I had felt the same way about my romantic relationship like you described. Wow! You are the person I look up to. I admire your humility, if I can describe it like that, and rational thinking. I would love to be like that. But like Jono, I find discomfort very challenging so I got my way to go. Thank you, guys, so much for having these segments and opening up. I really learned a lot and I feel very thankful for that. I am sending you my regards ❤

[TNHawke]

Mmmmm, some good, deep stuff here. I actually paused and rewound and replayed a few times to write down some quotes.
The stuff about these are the choices you've made and are making, and that's fine. But, I need thi, if this dynamic is going to work.
With the implied, if the dynamic doesn't or can't work, that is ok too. Maybe we need to change the dynamic. If not spouses, perhaps just friends. We can still be loving and respectful and acknowledge that this just isn't working as it is.

Good stuff, guys. Thank you.

[stephanierodriguez]

Love the series!!! So many things to consider. Thank you!

[jaginaiaelectrizs]

💜
Wonderfully said, through-and-through~

[sarahlandis]

Alicia's little squeak at the beginning was adorable 🤗