Do Narcissists Know They’re Narcissists? The Truth Revealed!

**Do Narcissists Know They're Narcissists?**

Narcissists often lack self-awareness, which prevents them from recognizing their own narcissistic behaviors. This is due to impaired insight, where they fail to see their flaws that others easily notice, similar to not noticing food on your chin while everyone else does. Narcissism can be a normal phase of development, but if it intensifies and isn’t outgrown, it can lead to Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). Individuals with NPD use defense mechanisms like denial and projection, and cognitive biases such as self-serving and confirmation biases, to maintain a distorted self-view. These strategies shield them from facing their shortcomings, often blaming others for mistakes.

Daniel J. Fox, Ph.D., is a licensed psychologist in Texas, international speaker, and a multi-award-winning author. He has been specializing in the treatment and assessment of individuals with personality disorders for over 20 years in the state and federal prison system, universities, and in private practice. His specialty areas include personality disorders, ethics, burnout prevention, and emotional intelligence.

He has published several articles and books in these areas and is the author of:

Complex Borderline Personality Disorder: How Coexisting Conditions Affect Your BPD and How You Can Gain Emotional Balance. Available at:

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00:00 Introduction
00:53 Narcissists lack of self awareness
01:32 Impaired Insight
04:14 Degrees of narcissism and their development
08:29 Defense Mechanisms - Denial & Projection
10:00 Cognitive biases
10:45 Confirmation bias
13:19 Capitulation of the Narcissist’s Social Circle
15:47 How working with a professional is different

[mcawesomest]

The fact that they won’t hurl narc abuse in front of certain people shows they have some insight on what they are doing

[janberger]

Narcissists tend to know who to abuse - and who to NOT abuse. My ex-husband was well behaved with his boss, his co-workers, and people he perceived to have more power.

[leeboriack]

Narcissists aren’t in reality and you just can’t expect or hope for them to change.

[camiversa]

Thanks again for the insightful video, Dr. Fox.
It is so sad it breaks my heart.

Obviously it is sad also for the loving partner/family member. You see they are not aware, you try to help them, they blame you, discard you in the worst way because you dared question their self-awareness. You are heartbroken but you feel, at least, at peace with your conscience: you tried everything you could to help them. Slowly you will put the pieces togheter. But an enourmous sadness for the narcisist remains. They can buy the biggest house, the newest car, go to the most elite places, but you know they are not living an authentic life, and that basically the life they chose is unhealthy and at the end counterproductive. I have my doubts the majority will ever take accountability, maybe only at the time of death, for a short time when they realise they just destroyed instead of enjoyed life... For me it is one of the saddest thing a human being could do. Thanks again Dr, you help a lot of people with your work ❤

[Lultschful]

I've heard it so many times from my father, whenever I'd point out a behavior he has it's "And what about you?" and when I'd tell him the pain he's caused me "Oh you think I'm not suffering too?" He's 78, now and I have zero hope of him changing, as senility is making his behavior even worse. Just waiting for him to die, at this point. As callous as it may sound. He's not happy, anyway, he drew every relative away except me and he's profoundly lonely.

[Narc_Hunter]

Proof they're self aware are the lengths they go through to hush and silence the victims!!!

[James-mchc]

They know they are evil but they do not know they are narcissist.

[joyshipley]

I think when their behaviour is pointed out to them inside they probably know but will defend or project it back 🥴

[nugget]

They often know. But not always... The worst ones are not self aware.

[MrTodayistheday]

This is the best description of the narcissistic behavior that I have ever seen. It describes the full cycle.

[jamesrasmussen]

We shouldn't have to learn about these people, I'm sick of their shit.

[ooolrait]

It so crazy to be able to learn these things for free. Helping out with a like button smash on every video. Thank you, Sir, and greetings from Scandinavia.

[Handlethisss]

My narcissistic ex husband would scam people and I would ask him if he doesn't feel bad and he said he can sleep at night because he actually did them a favor by teaching them a lesson.

[kirkstewart-vfhg]

Absolutely not !
They think you are the Narcissist ...

[Parvatimehmi-nw]

I have narcissistic traits and I am watching videos to remind myself that I can be treated. This helped

[ramonaharter]

😮. My mom's a grandiose narcissist and everybody at the table just sits there like waiting for her to wipe food off her face and she never notices it's there. I know it was an analogy but that was wild that you said that. It shows turn level my self-awareness

[MarkLupson-itxu]

If you think that a narcissist trusts you, you’ve played yourself.

[JayJeyBo.]

The problem is, in my experience, the people who are most likely to notice and gently point out a narcissist's bad behavior, are also the most likely to already be a scapegoat of sorts in the narcs eyes. They/we are authentic, open about our pain and shame but unburdened by it, and highly adept at noticing shared pain in others. I've found that narcs resent our openness and feel threatened by any attempt at intimacy.

They know that we know who they really are and it terrifies them. No amount of proving you're a safe, trustworthy person can change their mind. Unfortunately, the people they value most are usually those who fall for their act.

I've had to let those people go after years of trying to help them accept and overcome their shame. Each time, they chose a path of destruction (character assassination, assault, lying, etc.) over healing.

[deepaknambisan]

Really clear breakdown of core elements (in varying degrees, obviously) of narcissism. This video gave me food for thought, thank you 🙏🏾

[briandonovan]

Probably best explanation ive ever heard of this. Because of my experiences growing up i see some of these behaviors in myself throughout my life. Im 60 now and have begun in the last 3 yrs to become self aware after having a profound awaking only after some intense suffering. I have been doing some shadow work to try to uncover these traits. Its helped me see how they developed in the first place. Im not sure if i wd be described as narcissistic But i wish i cd work with someone like yourself that cd help me navigate this
Currently i have been working on deconstructing my ego, shadow work and have studied differsnt spiritual content such as meditation, yoga Buddhism, Hinduism, Christianity and have found all of these practices and comtent very helpful. Having someone like yourself could also be very helpful to understanding all of this
I plan on watching more of your videos. Thank you for sharing your knowledge on this. Most of the channels i find about this have not explained it as thoughly as you have.