Find Yourself After Heartbreak

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Losing someone you love after a break up is like finding yourself out alone in the wilderness wondering how you’re ever going to make it home again.

You know things are going to get worse before they get better.

But the beautiful realization comes when we realise we can always come back stronger and still be open-hearted in our attitude to love.

In this week’s LOVELife, I speak to a caller who feels completely alone after a rough break up, and needs to find herself again. I talk her through some practical steps and mindset changes that anyone can use who feels lost after a relationship has ended.

The dark periods are always there in life, but we can also choose how long we’re going to remain in them.
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Video links at the end -

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[vacationboyvideos]

I WAS comfortable "alone" before ...but to be alone after a breakup being "alone" now sucks

[cjmckaena]

The hardest part isn't the break up, it's the memories you're left with. It's extremely hard loving someone and letting that person go.. But time is your friend and you will get through it! Good luck!

[maribelcarranza]

Sometimes I'm sad and sometimes I'm ok. Sometimes I cant sleep. Sometimes I cry and wipe my tears away. Then I say to myself, you can do this it's not the end of the world. Then i get sad all of a sudden. I guess this is a process that heart breaks go through. It hurts very much. Like a piece of me is gone.

[merybethancourt]

the way she said ''being alone'' broke my heart a little cause i feel the same

[atreju]

Creating yourself instead of finding yourself - love that!

[NCGirlify]

"Date yourself" is a great concept. I'm going to try this. Thank you.

[llCakes]

I tooootally wish I stayed single. I lost myself in a relationship before ever truly discovering myself. Now I’m more lost than I was before the relationship and don’t even know where to look to discovering the real me.

[andybrown]

one of the saddest things in life is having made so many happy memories with someone who is now just a memory. :-(

[charlottemaison]

The worst is seeing your ex already in a relationship .... :( after they told you they loved you and asked you to marry them in only 2 months after the relationship. :(....how can someone be so heartless ?

[zuhaabid]

I wanted to become an interior designer but I was engaged to a stupid man & when i broke up with my fiancée the first thing I did, I got myself an admission for interior designing & now I'm a professional Interior designer. I got my fiance's text one day about being sorry & everything, instead of accusing him for anything I thanked him for the break up. (I think that's the best thing happened to me)
I gave myself a few years without running into anyone else because I didn't want sympathies or stupid advices. I took a decision & act accordingly. It's just a phase guys, please respect yourself first & try to take care of your emotional health aswell like you take care of your appearance.

[Ketuna]

I was very comfortable and happy with my single life, then came he, made everything upright, made me feel loved and wanted to love and be loved and then pushed me away for someone else, left me with all my feelings destroyed...

[lauraheidorn]

my mom was suprized how fast I moved on from my divorce. She said I am a very strong woman and she is so proud of me.

[aneeznovelist]

Sending healing vibes to all of us going through such a painful situation.

[sarahdavies]

Rejection and loneliness is really tough ❤️

[kelseyneapetung]

hardest breakup ever. I think I'm handling it well. I believe today was as worst as it can get. I literally cried all day and I only got two hours of sleep. I'm spending a good amount of time with family and also with myself. I started writing music, I always wanted to do that. I don't like the fact that I know I have to be alone.. I jumped into this passed relationship 9 months after I got out of a 5 year relationship. and this one only lasted a year but it hurts so much more and I think I'm grieving the loss of my last two exes because I never gave myself that time to be alone. I'm scared but I know I'm strong enough to do this. I'll be okay.

[krissyp]

Everytime I get my heart broken. I think "Well I always have Matthew and his crew... The videos, the advice, and the time they spend telling people this to shall pass. And it gets better.

So, thank you. For everything...

[evie]

Retreat, regroup, rediscover who you are. One of the best things that ever happened to me was a break up a few years ago. It led me on a new path of re-discovering who I am and ended up on a road I would not have dreamed. Use it as an opportunity to see your life as a blank canvass & to create whatever you want. I thank that ex every day for breaking up with me. It turned out to be one of the best gifts in my life so far. Good luck!

[addieflowers]

I've only been in two real serious relationships..but now that I think back I never really gave myself time to learn how to be happy on my own in between those relationships. I was always trying to seek approval from a new guy to make myself feel better. This time around I am healing on my own.. yes it feels like a lonely road at times and missing the person comes in waves but with the pain I feel growth. Heads up ladies, your broken heart will heal and the best is yet to come.

[JulesyRS]

My 11yr marriage ended a couple of months ago, this is exactly what I'm going through. Love having teammates like Matthew in my corner. The road seems alittle less scary.

[alanaadams]

After being in a relationship for two years my boyfriend (now ex) broke up with me over the phone for no apparent reason... simply because he didn’t love me... this was just over a month ago now and I remember that day too well... I cried like a baby all day and night... I smashed things... I felt like I wanted to die for that whole entire first week... then suddenly I felt sad but that scary suicidal mindset seemed to shift... I was so grateful for that because I can’t even describe the pain and sadness I felt during that time... the reason I’m commenting on this video is to say thank you to Mathew for posting this... I’ve watched it so many times during this break up... I’m trying to do exactly what Is said in this video, to create myself and become comfortable with being alone. Let me tell you after a month of working on this I’m starting to get there... it’s worth it guys, stay strong. If you’re going through hell right now please keep fighting don’t give up like I nearly did. 🖤