Self-help for social anxiety 3: A cognitive model

Link to worksheets:

Link to the playlist:

[Commander_Cat]

Anybody here went from being confident once and having personality to the opposite?

[Pietrok]

Thank you you're doing this. It's really nice to see somebody is releasing his work and providing help to other people around the world for so they can use it for free :)

[cboi]

I’ve been struggling with social anxiety for the past seven years since I was 14. I never really spoke up about it to others and never really worked towards change, I just thought it was just a part of my identity now and tried to carry on with my life. Yet it constantly got in the way caused me to live in fear due to the stupidest ideas. For me SA gave me severe tightness in my head, jaw, and crybaby eyes. These physical feelings combined with low self esteem have caused to act like an empty shell of myself in public. I’m gonna fix this though by the end of this year!

[She_Wonders]

Thank you so much for making this information not only empirically based but also free for all of us to use. I just printed out all the worksheets, and I can't wait to use them.

[jfpvuox]

Thank you for making this course free and for that you help people not to lose hope completely and show that there is a way out!❤❤❤

[abbeyh]

:( blushing is a huge symptom for me, and it’s strictly because of the embarrassment of being perceived by others. In media blushing is often portrayed as a reaction to having a crush on someone or whatever, (which is never the case for me) so i feel like that assumption makes it even worse for me because then I assume that everyone else assumes that i “like” who ever i’m talking to, but in reality i’m just blushing out of embarrassment 😭😭 i wish i could stop this but it happens in almost every social interaction i have. it’s awful

[Sneakyne]

Didnt give u permission to use my situation as a case example. But I forgive you.

[timnasome]

This felt so personal (self focus) that I started remembering all of my past presentations (rumination) which were destroyed by me pushing down my trembling voice until I just would burst into crying (cognitive and bodily symptoms, safety behaviors).

By remembering all of this about myself (self focus) I started crying again (bodily symptoms). Needless to say since I finished with school I haven't volunteered for any presentations (safety behaviors).

In summary.. ouch, that flow chart tore me apart.

[robsmith]

Thankyou Magnus. Really useful in understanding myself much more and far more useful than any NHS CBT counselling I’ve ever had. - no slight on the NHS in general but they are stretched too thin and less effective as a result.

[pedrol]

Why did my heart beat fast as I heard Peter’s situation😭

[francesbernard]

What a coincidence. This is the same theory I kept in mind while coping with anxiety a long time ago while going through a lot for 17 years the first time I went through a lot. Because I had already taken the course Physiology 101 as a university freshman too. It did help me a lot while learning how to not take things too personally as a young adult at the time. Wish I had done more later in my early middle age to help someone who showed up in the shoe store once to work for us before I was told by the manager of the store that she got hired. That was so long ago now I cannot remember if it was when I was still a manager of a department there before I broke my forearm which needed surgery right away and then requested lighter duties. She had shown up not adhering to our dress code expecting to work. She grew very red in the face, appeared to have a problem with maybe hot flashes and said, "Don't you want me to work for you anymore already on my first day here?" At the time we were all there being expected to carry, set up ladders up to 12 feet or so long alone or in pairs to climb up them to retrieve a box of shoes and then carry the box of shoes back down the ladder while the store was busy. I didn't know what to do at the time so I for awhile ignored her until she gave up and then left the store. After that during the season when parents are rushing to buy shoes for their children before school starts while my arm was in a partly a cast and while I was coping with other health problems too at the time related to menopause too I felt anxiety. The prescriptions offered to me only made me feel light headed and prone to fall. During a busy day the anxiety got so bad I felt short tempered. The supervisors I had there for only awhile were understanding enough while I was healing however after that they kept reducing my hours in an unpredictable schedule while changing the scheduling system at the time. Everyone there felt more anxiety than usual because the music playing on the loudspeaker sounded so mysogonistic and full of hate. In addition before my hours were getting cut back slowly but surely there was one day a woman who looked pregnant at the time who had walked into our store and then admitted that she was in labor unexpected too early and it was for the first time and so she didn't know what to do because a rush of maybe amniotic fluid had just fallen to the floor. Again I felt overwhelming anxiety and maybe didn't handle the situation right when calling for an ambulance, cleaning the floor of the customer bathroom and remaining with her there lying on the floor on coats until the ambulance came to get her. Without anyone there phoning for police when suspecting that some crime was being committed. Then after my hours got cut back to nothing a much younger than me woman who had been assigned to be what was called a supervisor fell off of the ladder when I wasn't around, got a concussion and broke an arm too. Quite some time after my arm which was already healed from an injury some years before that got broken too when I was headed to West Edmonton Mall nearby on my off work hours. I have learned something from all those experiences. How can I apply what I have learned now in different role than what I was at the time studying for too at the time? I try not to stress too much about that while having unreasonable too high of a standard to prove that at age 66 now I am employable too just like the young girl who healed before me.

[peterFamm]

I relate to the story and the name, literally 🤷

[kaitheguy]

Thanks for making these videos. I've been struggling with anxiety ever since I started high school back in 2018 and lately it's been ruining my life. I recently had to quit my job because of the sheer pressure I felt just by being around other people and the fear of how they would perceive me. I'm struggling with keeping in touch with my friends because of my anxiety as well. It really sucks to have to live with this issue constantly trying to ruin my life in every capacity so I'm taking the steps necessary to overcome it. I came across the link to these videos on reddit so I'm hoping that watching these modules and doing these worksheets will help in some way.

[abie]

This is golden! I can't believe I found such a professional video series on YouTube. Subscribed!

[Eevvaann]

I am 27 years old and I experience social anxiety with women, I really want to fix it and get love and affection. There was only one girlfriend and sex in my life, and that was 5 years ago, since then I have been avoiding it. Thank you for these videos, they helped me take the first small steps - do not look away and talk when possible, I also downloaded tinder and will soon start dating. It is very pleasant to listen to you, although you are a translator, your speech is sweet and kind, you seem to accept my deviations through the screen :). Sorry for grammatical errors

[GigatLP]

This video is very helpful. For some reason the comments are full of spam for some random shit though.

[forensicmentalhealthandCBT]

Really helpul stuff - keep up the good work!

[labyfan]

I'm 37 and I only discovered I had social anxiety a few years ago. I had never heard that term before. I just thought I was shy. But after hearing it, I don't know where and reading about it, I realized what I had was more than just shyness. I recently was getting some counselling and that person said something must have happened in my life to cause my social anxiety. But I remember being embarrassed and worried about what my own family thought of me on my 3rd birthday when I got Play-Doh as a present and tried to eat it. Once I tasted it I knew I wasn't supposed to eat it but I was so embarrassed and I remember looking around to see if anyone saw me do that. Thankfully they didn't. But it's frustrating when you are trying to get help and people don't seem to really understand it.

[elfrank]

I hope it helps me anxiety it co troling my life 😪 thanks for taking the time to help

[iamsofia]

I started hyperventilating and ran out of the class when I just had to introduce myself to others, so I wouldn't be able to even give a presentation. I think my issue is too severe for this program.