When narcissists expect things to go back to normal

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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.

THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.

[scotttully]

As Lee Hammock says, “Narcs think time is an apology.”

[StillAwakeAwareDiscerning]

Of course they, "want to go back to normal". In narc speak that means they don't have to apologize, introspect or change their behavior. And the target is just supposed to go back to thinking they are wonderful. Leaving this crazy was the hardest thing I have ever done due to being groomed by my parents that this insanity was "normal". If you are born into this it is all you know. Run from these people. They don't love you. They don't care about you. And they don't change they only get worse.

[lightbeingform]

I’m not holding a grudge, I’m learning a lesson.

[jamiepatton]

I never heard that we should go back to normal. He just acted like nothing ever happened and we were all supposed to just understand that we should act normal again.

[yukio_saito]

The only way to go back to normal is to stay away from them.

[Mmax]

Yes. Can’t we just go back to normal where you don’t have any rights, or boundaries, and we get to treat you however we want and use you for the butt of our jokes?

[t.k.]

"This phrase of 'can't we just go back to normal?' is also a tool of the enablers who have no problem with *you* being the sacrificial lamb so everyone's lives can just keep rolling as usual. So 'going back to normal' is just code for 'can't you just keep the _status quo_ so the rest of us don't need to be uncomfortable'?"
No line has ever been this accurate to the current times we're living, honestly.

[kim.mie.]

When my ex and i were together, he once said "why cant you forgive me like you always do?!" I am so grateful to be free from that cycle 💕

[StayTrueToYourTureSelf]

I used to say that to the Narcissist all the time… “It never was normal’”, “I used to say how do you wake up with “selective amnesia” every day?” He’d forget about what happened and he’d just “sweep it under the rug” nothing ever got resolved. I used to say “ there’s so much water under the bridge I’m drowning.” It was a very awful feeling…i felt as though my thoughts and emotions didn’t matter I started to feel empty inside. I ended up in a fight or flight mode for years. The hell (relationship) lasted in eight years… I’m finally out of it and happier than ever. There’s hope. Stay strong!

[africanacity]

Narcissist’s loove being in relationships with forgivers, so that they keep abusing them and they keep forgiving and hopefully keep them for as long as they can 🙌🏼

[bobbiekinns]

My grandma & mom always said to me “don’t be so sensitive”. I no longer need or want to have a relationship with my aunt or anyone else that’s narcissistic. I’m very peaceful.

[loril]

My husband of 31 years was having a 10 year affair with an ex employee. I found out on 1-1. I am now divorced from the full blown narcissist. He never wanted to talk about what he did. Wanted me to forget about it and just move on! How in the world am I supposed to just forget about that? I now suffer from cptsd but getting stronger and stronger everyday! Thank you for your videos! To all the people suffering from narc abuse my heart goes out to all of you! You are not alone!

[patriciapaulineguevara]

When we won’t go back to normal we have “changed”. 😘

[JC.Realm]

This channel is very important. Most people around us just don't understand how serious narcissistic abuse is... I'm so happy people like Dr. Ramani are sharing their insights.

[wordswordswords]

In my family, they don't ask if things go back to normal, they just do it like nothing ever happened. They don't even acknowledge it enough to ask.

[hannaclue]

He never asks that. He simply acts like everything is normal again.

[SueP-D]

I get chastised for only remembering “the negative” when recounting past experiences. What he refuses to grasp is that his sh*t behaviors ruined or at least tainted almost every event we ever attended or experienced.

[AromaticSympathy]

I’ve definitely heard it. I’ve also heard “let’s not talk about it” and “don’t hold grudges”. These people think saying sorry fixes everything. I’ve come to realize their apologies are as empty and meaningless as they are. It’s just a manipulation tactic for them to go back to their “normal” with you.

[lizard]

The narcissist I'm living with doesn't even ask for life to go back to normal. After an argument or disagreement I'll receive the silent treatment or worse, condescending or viscous comments for a day or up to a week. Then flips a switch and acts like nothing had even happened and feigns confusion as to why I'm unhappy. Thanks for sharing these videos Dr. Ramani. You've helped me immensely in this long, scary journey to personal freedom. I'm dealing with this situation so much better these days, knowing this person will likely never change for the better. Cheers.

[taviastroup]

In couples counseling the therapist told us we need to just let everything go, and start over from scratch. I made sure we stopped going to that therapist after that.