The Problem With Modern 'Self-Love'

Self-love and self-compassion are crucial practices that help us to become the best version of ourselves possible, generating positive ripple effects in the world around us. But if we aren't careful, the modern notion of self-love can be used as a form of self-judgment: an unrealistically high yardstick that we use to measure our worth, success, and "spiritualness."

0:00 - Introduction
0:19 - Self-Shaming and Unrealistic Standards
1:14 - Superficial Self-Love and Being Open
1:49 - Compartmentalizing Self-Love & Going Deeper
2:37 - Loving Yourself Doesn't Mean Being Passive
3:13 - Ask Yourself This Question
3:50 - Conclusion

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#selflove #selfcompassion

[hussaineh]

I totally agree. The other danger of self-love is the hating of others, and making the super ego righteous. The trick is to let go of this alter power, and humbly accept our own flaws rather than shutting ourselves with blame or guilt. Love to Luna and Sol for such wisdom, so simply put

[susannehein]

Your message came with perfect timing for me, just yesterday I fell back into the trap of rejecting myself for my negativity that I have been struggling with all my life and lead to selfhate so painful it let's me dissociate....for me finding self compassion when travelling into the darkest places within myself is key to developing self love. Please know your work has been an essential guidance and anchor on my journey, thank you from the bottom of my heart for inspiring me always to keep going when it's hardest. Much love from DR

[brod_pete]

I think many of us are being conditioned to dismiss our afflicting emotions because the Law of attraction and Self Love movement have put such a negative stigma on those type of feelings. I have learned that Self Awareness is key when we Spiritually bypass the human condition. Settling in the breath allowing these emotions to pass and then transmuting them to a loving thought has helped me.

[kellinawilkinson]

For me, self-love is about the same as reparenting. I understand this may be different from other's journeys, but I find allowing myself to be in little space and comfort myself is very beneficial. I hope as self care becomes more normal it will be easier to do those routine things to take care of my body like brushing my teeth.

[ewa-ulrica-lotus]

Thank you SO much for this video. For your thoughts and profound insights. Thank you for being truly wise, yet humble. And for being deeply sincere, yet accepting
and so tolerant toward our Souls Journeys. You seem honest, so direct, yet very warm. The message is clear, FIRM, but still calming to me. You speak AND radiate true ‘Loving Kindness’. It’s rare.
Rare in the ‘spiritual’, astrological
and psychological world. Even in the world of Healers, LightWorkers, Starseeds and Mediums, It’s rare.
I practice a bit in all of them, yet I feel like something always is missing.. And that I don’t belong anywhere. (Especially since my friends and family don’t share my ‘worlds’’ ) ANYWAY! I’m glad that
I’ve found you, You give me hope. And a feeling of not being alone.
Your videos, the web sight and the emails, makes me feel comforted in a way (THAT’S rare for me) So Thank you for all your work and for putting it out there. And Thank You Universe for guiding me here❣️
I’m sending you lots of winterwhitechrystalclear Light and summergreenorangewarm Hugs. Love from Me in Sweden to ALL of You everywhere. Whoever you are. We are all Divine Souls, multidimensional Beeings, trying to cope with our messy ‘Humanness’ here on planets Earth..
For that, I feel love, compassion and understanding for all of Us....and
a bit of sadness 🤍....
Namaskar. 🙏 💫 🕉

[vunguyentr]

Self-Love is the hardest part of the Self-Realization process as I've experienced so far. The key to Self-love is Acceptance.

[tntreasures]

Hi Luna and Sol . Self -love I have found out is hard to see . I am experiencing this walk for I am an Empath - I do feel pain and seem to attract it . Which I led me to walk a path I've never thought I would even think of .. when I became a nurse in 2003 it has been a journey of Yes I've found my calling to a very dark place and I have made it to the otherside I can see sunshine once more . But there are times when negativity tries its ol scare tactics, this time I know who negatively is. I meet with compassion. I could go on and on about this subject. Thank you both for your time and efforts for all of us . Greatly appreciated 💚

[meredith]

Anything we dont accept becomes personal. If we're alone and we don't accept it we become lonely, if we don't accept ourselves we become ashamed, if we don't accept pain we suffer, etc. Self love has become the objective when it should be a state of being. Self love isn't something to strive for in itself. It's simply what happens when you really learn to know and be compassionate towards yourself. I have done enormous shadow work in the past 4-5 months and that's one of the lessons I've learned and continue to learn every day.

[MyIndependentChannel]

You asked for comments about what awkward / uncomfortable / seemingly unlovable qualities did I observe within myself that I could learn to love. My answer is: my melancholy mood. Because the modern world places unnecessary roadblocks in the way of some healthy forms of self-love, I now have the opportunity to spend more time (than I would prefer to) with practicing being open to this current experience.

[jennybruner]

Perfect timing. I have been turning every "should" into "self-love"...exercise is self-love, eating right is self love, sobriety is self love, keeping up with my school assignments is self love, managing my money is self love...so your video helps me see that this is self shame more than self love.

[lauriehaisley]

Thank you, I think this an important message. I often forget that. I think there are quite a few aspects of myself which I have come to acceptance with. However, I have a difficult time accepting the fact that I am shy, awkward and introverted. It is hard in this society to be those things. Working on accepting those things and also not to let my shyness define who I am as a person.

[jennyyyy]

Yesterday I made a big mistake that I finally understand the meaning of 666 number the universe sent me all the time. I had taken your "Inner Child's Need test" and also got the message "Slowing down", but yesterday I still made that mistake. I felt regret, blamed on myself, but during the shock I tried to discover which lesson behind it. I spent 10' to meditate to calm myself down and realize the thought: "Don't look back at what you loss, focus on what you have". And I feel that I should show the compassion to myself, even to my big mistake. That's is the true self-love. If I can do that for myself, I can also do that for others. Thanks you for your videos.
Although English is not my mother tongue but I always follow your content (by turn on CC subtite), thank you for your hard work.

[kukundrela]

My capacity for feeling pain. This is what I have issues loving within myself.
I feel deeply everything. Positive, negative, and in-between. Additionally an INFJ according to the official Myers-Briggs. Having retaken it multiple times through the years. Empath. Makes such sense :) It would be very curious if you could maybe speak about the ability to both accept what you are feeling and experiencing, and not fearing it. Since sometimes feeling pain deeply makes me scared that this pain may cause illness in the long run.

Thank you 💜

[rodneyalmeida]

After watching this video I went and inquired deep within if I truly love myself....I found a shocking revelation. I was running away and rejecting the fact that I was a victim of abuse and shame in my childhood and I was not accepting that and it was coming out in the form of an addiction.i have battled with self abuse and self hate for a very long time. Hopefully now I will come to the terms that I was a victim of abuse and that it was not my fault as I was only a child and helpless. Thanks for your work and presence in this world. Love, peace and kindness.

[ragingraven]

Thank you for this video. I believe that it is very important to make contact with all parts of ourselves. Your Shadow work journal has been very eye-opening for me. As a helper, I must continue to remember that all emotions have value. Currently, as I navigate big life changes I realize that my suffering has a purpose as it creates opportunities for growth. Your work is very authentic, relatable, and intimate. Thank you....

[garycollins]

Ps through you I realised I am an ENFP - Extrovert, intuitive, feeling and perceptive and this has helped me accept my sensitivity not as weakness but as a strength - like being gay - not a weakness for me but a strength that fits me perfectly. I now feel so blessed in life. All about perception ? Amazing how a year can feel so very different.

[rallapallinirmala]

Self love has a very important dimension of validation on regular basis in every season of life

[erikagargis]

Thank you 🦋 The I shoulds “ still trip me up at times-sometimes situations arise where I “should” have been more this or that, and stories I create around the incident begin going around and around in my mind. Staying in the present moment truly does help, and for me, meditation as well. Thank you again for sharing🦋💖

[elanorasweetheart]

Thank you so much with love, it is important topic
As for me I started the journey of self-love back in 2017 and I am still in the process
I cleaned all of my relationships, anything that brings harm for me I end it, I changed some of my friends also, and the way I react to others.
My personality changed and I learned how to say no to those who take advantage of me and I cut them off.
Knowledge is power, I learn and read more.
My health is priority so I workout
No more junk food like before, I care about the quality of what I eat, I cook my own food, it is very rare for me to eat from restaurant, I can sense the energy of the person who made it, so I don`t like the idea of eating outside home like before, and I still search of other ways to show love to myself because I love myself.

[rainprize]

i always get a bit tired of being sensitive to everything and sometimes say to my roommate i wish i wasnt like this. i have to constantly weed out whatever toxins from the environment are causing me illness or rash or fog etc.. having to always ask her to make adjustments to the life she brings into the home for my sake. she's nice about it. and inside i am sort of glad i am sensitive because it alerts me to toxins i might not of been sensitive to before. health is a hobby so it serves me.

however i still reject it sometimes, even though i dont think i do inside... it comes out when i talk to roommate. it just slips outta nowhere.. "yeah i wish i wasnt like this 'cus it's so tiring to deal with".. i used to think i say it just to be polite to her and reduce chance of conflict over my needs.. but indeed now i am starting to glimpse that i reject it somewhat... just because it's so difficult to get along daily sometimes. but thanks to this videop i am staRTING TO see all the ways it has been a blessing, showing me more about myself and which habits, lifestyles, jobs, and which people, and entertainment, even personal practices were healthier for me.

i guess in a nutshell it's all connected to my relationshsip with my personal intuition and how often i listen to / conveine with it... on the surface i called it a tiring sensitiveity to "worldly" and societal toxins though