8 Things Parents Shouldn't Say to Their Child

Have your parents ever told you something that, to this day, still makes you tear up every time you think about it? Our words hold so much more power than we realize, especially over others. But most of us don’t even realize that we’ve said something wrong until it’s too late and the damage has already been done. That’s why we’re taught from a young age the importance of thinking before we speak, a lesson we ought to remember even as adults and especially as parents.

DISCLAIMER: If you can relate to any of these signs, please do not take this feedback as an attack on your character. This video was meant to be a self-improvement guide for those of you who have been feeling a little stuck.

Writer: Chloe Avenasa
Script Editor: Vanessa Tao
Script Manager: Kelly Soong
VO: Amanda Silvera
Animator: Sun Biscuit
YouTube Manager: Cindy Cheong

References:
Burnett, P. C., & McCrindle, A. R. (1999). The Relationship Between Significant Others’ Positive and Negative Statements, Self-Talk, and Self-Esteem. Child Study Journal, 29(1), 39-39.
Colonnesi, C., Draijer, E. M., Jan JM Stams, G., Van der Bruggen, C. O., Bögels, S. M., & Noom, M. J. (2011). The relation between insecure attachment and child anxiety: A meta-analytic review. Journal of Clinical Child & Adolescent Psychology, 40(4), 630-645.
Jadon, P. S., & Tripathi, S. (2017). Effect of authoritarian parenting style on self esteem of the child: A systematic review. International Journal of Advance Research and Innovative Ideas in Education, 3(3), 909-913.

[NightcoreChase]

Before I even watch, I have been told by my mother that “I wish I never gave birth to you” I didn’t cry but I think about it a lot, im a guy if it matters or not

[anika]

**offers virtual hugs to everyone down in the comments section who’s been mistreated by a parent** <3 much love for y’all

[FriendlyZoey]

Having BPD and being told to "Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about" while going through a split as a child and getting hit for "not complying" completely messed up how interacted with people permanently. I'll never forget how much fear I felt in that moment.

[AydenNH]

The sad thing is that there will barely be any parents watching this or any related video and the viewers will mostly be kids who wish parents could see this themselves, abusive or not.

[lonewolfnergiganos]

It's true that some parents only care about their children's grades, they say nobody's perfect but expects perfection from them.

[ivy_nightshade]

Seriously, Parenting needs to be a subject at school, so that kids will know how to look after a younger person. Would be a lot more practical than teaching things you will never use in life....

[sanatwice-iwnf]

it always hurt me when mom tells me "you're the worst thing that happened to me."

I hope that one day I can come through this! and thank you for this video.

[APRSN]

"Man up." i was having a panic attack

[indigofenrir]

"I wish I had never given birth to you!"

"You never did, Dad."

[borablooded]

"everyone have problems, your problem isn't a big deal"

everyone has problems that doesn't mean my problem is less important I deserve to be loved.

[.Felix.]

Growing up being told ‘I’ll give you something to cry about’ when you’re crying just makes something click in your brain, linking crying to something troublesome. So you end up not crying, and bottling it up. Turning that into a different bad emotion.

[Lilyannes_way-fuvg]

"What happened to my strong little girl"?
She grew up dad and got emotions, got more vulnerable, and started to try to accept herself

[therianprincess]

"Because I said so"
"This is stupid."
"You're being ridiculous."
"You need to grow up."
"I never had this problem with your sister when she was your age."

Yes, I have a very loving mother.

[adambomb]

Parents often say things that they'll never remember...but their children will never forget.

[trashpandaeli]

"youre my strong one I know I can always rely on you for support"
You're a parent I'm supposed to be able to rely on you

[Otrudillgt]

I struggle from Autism and ADHD so it’s hard to get things done. I do school work all day for five days, I study, I pay attention in class, but my parents still nag me about my low grade in science. My parents want me to be a doctor or a scientist, but I want to be a content creator. They said “content creation is useless and won’t get you anywhere, it’ll just put you in the streets.” That sentence shattered me to the core. I didn’t cry because they’d say “deal with it” or “you’re 14, you can handle it”. I can’t handle it, I’m just a kid, I can’t just deal with everything at once! Sorry to waste your time on this comment, I’ll just be ignored anyway

[katsuo]

The funniest conversation I've had with my parents went something like this:
“You don't deserve half of the things you have.”
“Does that include my PTSD?”

[soapybagle]

“You’ll experience worse, toughen up”
Whether it’s emotional or physical pain, you’re allowed to feel it. Just because someone “has it worse” doesn’t mean you can’t feel it. Pain isn’t a competition

[Lil-Beetle]

"It's not like we're abusing you"
Is a big one my folks used when I started to cry after they were screaming at me

I'm really sensitive to noises btw

[lilacroberto]

"Every time I see you you, you are eating."


Yeah that was what my mother said to me